When You're Ready
by jax514
Summary: That morning, it was her first clue. But then again, she could be reading the signs wrong. She wouldn't know for sure until she picked herself up off the ground and looked. Then she could figure out what came next. Rogan, post S7.
1. The Math Test

Chapter One – The Math Test

Her first clue that something out of the ordinary was happening was the apple that Rory grabbed to eat for breakfast on her way to the bus.

She'd slept through her alarm that morning, which should have been her _real _first clue that something was amiss. Rory was usually not the kind of person who slept through alarms; in fact, she was normally annoyingly punctual. But she'd been so tired lately that the sound of the alarm clock blaring at 5:30am (an unfortunate wake up time, but the bus had an early departure that day, what with the fact that they had almost 10 hours of driving to look forward to before reaching that day's function) did nothing to rouse her from her sleep. That morning, Rory's roommate, Claire, was forced to shake her awake.

"Whaa?" she said sleepily, pushing her hair out of her eyes.

"Rory, wake up!" Claire insisted. "The bus leaves in 30 minutes and you haven't even showered! Why are you still in bed, anyway?"

Rory had bolted out of bed in a panic, stumbling into the shower and getting dressed without even glancing down at what she'd chosen to wear that day.

Unfortunately, Rory's late start that morning meant that she had barely any time to have breakfast. While Claire dragged Rory's suitcase down to the bus for her, Rory ran down to the lobby to see if she could at least grab some coffee from the complimentary continental breakfast buffet. There was no _way_ Rory was going without coffee that morning, especially if she didn't have enough time to eat.

It was there that she saw the assortments of fruits piled neatly into a basket. Rory stared at the arrangement, barely even paying attention to the coffee she was pouring for herself. (Of course, this almost caused her to spill it all over the blue table cloth.) Her eyes zoned in on a beautiful, shiny red apple. The only thought that crossed Rory's mind was how delicious the piece of fruit looked. So without even really thinking about it, she grabbed the apple, tossing it into her laptop bag before carefully placing the lid on her coffee cup, and ran out to meet the other reporters on the bus.

She'd only been on the bus following Barak Obama's presidential campaign for a couple of weeks. It was fast paced and hard work, but Rory would be lying if she said she wasn't enjoying herself. Of course, adjusting her sleep schedule had been difficult, but that was to be expected, right? There were some days when the bus left at a perfectly respectable hour, and then there were others, like today, that only allotted a few hours of sleeping in a bed, while the rest of Rory's shut eye was destined to take place on a bus. Of _course_ she'd be tired all the time – that was to be expected. Maybe she seemed a bit more worn out than the other reporters were, but all that meant was they were better at adjusting than she was. It wasn't a big deal. It was certainly something that Rory could handle.

At least, Rory didn't _think_ it was a big deal, until she started eating the apple.

She was about half way finished with it when she suddenly remembered a time, about two years ago, when her mom had told her about a situation in which _she'd_ eaten an apple. For normal people, eating an apple wouldn't normally be a huge event. But Gilmore Girls did _not_ eat fruits or vegetables, _ever. _

It had happened the day that Sookie went into labor, before she had Martha. Lorelai had called Rory from the hospital, needing to tell her daughter that she'd just eaten an apple and liked it. Lorelai was a little freaked out, because the _last_ time she'd enjoyed eating an apple had happened when she was sixteen, over twenty years ago. It was the first sign that Lorelai was pregnant with Rory.

Of course, that day had turned out to be a fluke. Lorelai wasn't pregnant. Rory, on the other hand…

She dropped the apple in disgust, suddenly not hungry in the slightest.

No. It was impossible. She'd always been so careful. Rory couldn't possibly be –

But suddenly, she started doing the math in her head. She'd graduated from Yale almost three weeks ago. Normally, she tried hard not to think about her graduation day. It held too many unpleasant memories. Like the image of _his_ disappointed face as she handed him back the beautiful engagement ring he'd offered to her. She'd been unable to say yes at the time, and turning him down had nearly broken her heart. It was watching him walk away from her that really shattered it.

She tried to remember the last time she'd had sex (without actually thinking about the person in question, because the thought of him still caused a stabbing pain in her stomach). It must have been right before her graduation party; about three weeks ago. Had anything unusual happened that day? Rory couldn't remember once forgetting to take her birth control; normally, she was obsessively precise about taking it on time. She couldn't remember _ever_ skipping a birth control pill. Occasionally when the box was empty they'd go without a condom, but Rory couldn't for the life of her remember the last time they'd done that. Had it been recent? She didn't think so.

Panic started to set in when she realized her period should have come a week ago. In all the tumult from being on the bus and finally getting to be a real reporter, Rory hadn't even noticed that she was late.

"Are you okay?" Claire asked from the seat next to her. Rory had almost forgotten that she was there. "You look a little pale."

Was she? "I'm – " Rory started to say that she was fine, but she couldn't quite bring herself to finish that sentence. She _wasn't_ fine. Either this was all a fluke or she really was…oh god, that would be even worse. She couldn't even _think_ about what that meant. Not yet. Not until she knew for sure. Not until she had some perspective.

"I need to call my mom," Rory said instead. "Now."

"Are you crazy?" asked Claire as Rory fumbled through her purse in search of her cell phone. "You're from the East Coast; it's barely six in the morning back home!"

"I know, but it's important. I need…" her thought trailed off again. "I just really need to talk to her right now."

Claire stared at her blankly. Rory wasn't really surprised at Claire's confusion. In the short time she'd been on the bus, Rory had only acted this tongue tied and psychotic on her first day. Normally, Rory was much more composed and put together.

Claire rolled her eyes. "Whatever. Go take the Phone Booth if it's so important to you. But don't come crying to me if you're mom doesn't want to talk to you. I'm going back to sleep."

The Phone Booth, as the other reporters had named it, was the area in the very back of the bus. No one liked to sit back there. It was impossible to sleep, because every bump would jolt you awake. So instead, the last two rows of the bus were always kept empty, thus making it possible for someone to escape for a short amount of time to make a private phone call. Of course, it was impossible to have a _truly_ private call in such close proximity, but it was the best they could do under the circumstances. Most people who sat close to the Phone Booth were courteous enough to put in headphones whenever someone went to make a private phone call, but you could never be too sure that privacy was really being achieved.

Luckily for Rory it was still early, so most of the bus had already gone back to sleep. The previous night had given them a grand total of four hours to sleep in a hotel room after a very long day of covering a rally, so everyone was just as tired as Rory always seemed to be. She was grateful for that, at least, as she settled herself into the seats at the very back of the bus, scrolling through the contacts on her phone, and pushing send when she reached her house number.

"I hate you," was the mumbled response of her mother. "Whoever this is, I hate you."

"Mom?"

There was a shuffling sound as Rory waited for the response. She imagined that Lorelai was rolling over in her bed to check what time it was. Then, upon realizing how early her daughter was calling, Lorelai would probably sit up as the concern washed over her due to Rory's sudden phone call.

"Rory?" Lorelai questioned. "Honey, is everything okay? What's wrong?"

"I…" For what must have been the tenth time that day, Rory's thought trailed off. "I'm not sure."

"You're not sure if everything's okay, or you're not sure what's wrong?"

"Both, I guess." Rory let out a sigh. She didn't know exactly how to start this conversation.

There was silence on the other end of the phone as Lorelai waited for Rory to continue.

"I just ate an apple. And I liked it."

She was met with more silence.

"Are you trying to tell me what I _think_ you're trying to tell me?"

"Well, I don't know," said Rory, hugging her knees to her chest with one arm as she held the phone to her ear with the other, her back resting against the window of the bus. "I can't seem to think straight."

She listened as Lorelai took a deep breath. "Okay. Let's look at the facts here. Have you been feeling nauseous at all? How's your energy?"

"A little motion sickness sometimes, but nothing too bad. Usually just on the bumpy roads with lots of potholes. And I slept through my alarm this morning, but again, that could mean anything. Our sleep schedule has been awful."

"Okay. What about birth control? Have you missed any?"

"I don't think so; I can't really remember. It's been three weeks since the last time we…" Rory couldn't bring herself to say it. Images of that morning, the two of them getting ready for the graduation party, were already flashing through her mind. They were running late that day, having gotten bit distracted while getting ready, all their clothes winding up back on the floor before they'd even finished putting them on. She tried not to picture his smiling, happy face staring back at her as he –

She banished the images quickly.

"When was your last period?" Lorelai finally asked the blunt question; the one that Rory was dreading the most.

She tried to swallow the lump that was forming in her throat. "I should have gotten it a week ago."

She could almost hear Lorelai's thoughts ticking in her head through the phone. She was quiet for a long time.

"Well hun, I don't think there's really much I can tell you. Not until you take a – "

"_Don't_ say the 'p' word!" Rory insisted, a hint of panic rising in her voice. She wasn't ready to hear that just yet.

"Okay, fine. Let's call it 'math' for now."

"Math." Rory took a deep breath. She could do that. "Math is okay. I can call it math."

"Sweetie, here's what I need you to do. The second you can, go to the drug store and buy a…math test. Then lock yourself in the bathroom when you have some free time. Call me the _second_ you can, no matter what. You won't know anything until then, so try to relax a little. Get some sleep. Try not to obsess over this too much."

Rory was too freaked out to even argue that she wouldn't obsess over it. She let out her breath shakily.

"Mom…I don't want to pass this math test. I can't."

"Rory, I know you're worried, but don't over think this. You won't know for sure until you take the math test, so I want you to stop making the lists that I know you're already making with plans for what to do next _if_ you pass your math test. Try to take your mind off it, okay hun?"

"Okay." She pulled her legs in tighter, trying to squeeze the worry away. It wasn't working.

"And call me as soon as you can, even if it's the middle of the night."

"I will. Thanks, mom."

"Oh, kid," she heard Lorelai say with a sigh. "I promise you that it's going to be okay, no matter what happens."

* * *

><p>At the first rest stop, Rory hid in the aisles of the convenience storegift shop, waiting for all the other reporters to return to the bus. She then grabbed not one, but five different 'math' tests from the shelf, blushing furiously as she handed them to the cashier. She refused to look up as she handed the girl her money, and didn't even wait around for change. Rory buried the bag deep within her purse as she ran back outside to meet the bus.

She had trouble concentrating at the event she was supposed to be covering. Her notes were scattered at best. She'd have to stretch a bit in order to write a decent article. She might even have to recycle some older material, but for the first time, that didn't really bother her. She was too distracted today.

They were checked into their hotel by nine that night, with a full day off the next day. Many of the other reporters, including Claire, decided to take that opportunity to have a night out. Rory declined the offer, feigning a head ache (which wasn't that hard to fake; everyone else saw how off Rory was acting that day), and the minute Claire closed the door to their room behind her, Rory downed five large glasses of water in quick succession. Taking a deep breath, she dug the bag of 'math' tests out of her purse, and locked herself in the bathroom.

She lay down on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor, curled up on her side in the fetal position, while she waited for the allotted amount of time to pass.

She called Lane. She wasn't ready to talk to her mom yet; that would make it too real. She needed someone who would freak out with her. She needed her best friend.

"Hey, you have great timing," Lane said upon answering the phone. "I just got the kids to sleep. How are you? How's the campaign going?"

"I just took a math test!" Rory exclaimed, panic rising in her voice.

"Okay, you're gonna have to fill me in here. What are you talking about?"

Rory took several shallow breaths before beginning her explanation. "I'm a week late."

"Late for what?"

"Lane! _I'm a week late_."

There was a muffled silence on the other end of the line. Rory assumed that she was telling her husband, Zack, who was about to leave on a two month tour, to hold on for a minute. She heard the soft click of what sounded like a door closing.

"Okay, I'm outside," Lane continued. "Start again. You're a week late…"

"Right. I'm a week late. And this morning, I ate an apple."

"Oh, god."

"And I _liked_ it."

"_Oh_ my god!"

"And the same thing happened to my mom when she was…with me. It's how she knew."

"But wait a minute," Lane interrupted. "I thought you're taking birth control. You and Lo – "

"_Don't say his name_!" Rory exclaimed. "I'm sorry but…I'm barely holding it together as it is right now. I can't say his name, and I can't call it…what it is. Not until I know. So I'm calling it math."

"Got it. Hence the math test."

"Exactly," Rory said with a nod. She realized that Lane couldn't see her right now, but she needed to do _something,_ at least; otherwise she'd go crazy.

They sat in silence for a while, Rory attempting to get her breathing under control. "I'm freaking out, Lane."

"Just take a deep breath. Where are you right now?"

"I'm lying on the bathroom floor. Waiting. Or hiding, depending on your perspective of the situation."

"Hiding from the results of your math test?"

"Tests. I bought five of them."

"Sure, sure. Because five is more thorough than one."

Rory shivered slightly. The tiles were cold against her skin. Maybe putting on shorts and a t-shirt hadn't been the best idea, despite how warm the hotel room was. But then again, at the time, she didn't think she'd end up curled into a ball on the bathroom floor while she waited. "Lane? What happens if it says yes?"

"If it says yes then you'll figure something out. It's what I did. It's what you're mother did."

"Do I even tell…_Larry_?" She couldn't bring herself to say his real name.

"Rory, of course you tell him! He'd want to know, you know that."

She did know that, deep down. But she still couldn't get his crestfallen face out of her head.

When he proposed to her, Rory had wanted so much to say yes. But she couldn't bring herself to do it. Saying yes to him could have meant saying no to the rest of her life. She wanted to be an overseas correspondent, just like Christiane Amanpour. It hadn't been an easy decision, making that her priority. She thought that he would be supportive, just like she was when he went off to London, or when he left his father's company and had no clue as to what he was going to do with the rest of his life. He'd _told_ her to make her decision on her own, and he'd factor _her_ in. She thought for sure that he'd let her do just that.

Turns out, he didn't. He wanted all or nothing. She wasn't ready to give him everything just yet, so she was forced to choose nothing. And it broke her heart.

Rory missed him, _god_ did she miss him. Not nearly enough time had passed for her to be dealing with this. Keeping busy with the campaign had helped a bit. Most of the time, Rory's mind was so full of Senator Obama's speeches and her articles that she didn't have time to think about him. And when she did, she fell into the habit of quickly banishing his face from her mind. She wouldn't even allow herself to think his name. Sometimes she'd slip up, and a sinking feeling settled into her stomach. Shortly after the break up, she described the feeling to her mother as big waves coming really close together. After awhile, it was like she'd gotten so used to that feeling that it didn't even register to her anymore; she had become numb to it. It was the only way she'd been able to cope with the sudden loss of no longer having him in her life. She'd gone from having him in her life every day for three years, even when they were apart, to complete radio silence.

Maybe she was freaking out over nothing. Maybe she wasn't…going to pass her math test. Maybe everything was fine, and she could go back to the way things were. She could keep her amazing job covering Barak Obama's campaign for president. This was her first step to making all her dreams come true; she didn't want to give it up now that the thing she'd been working towards ever since she was a little girl was within her grasp. Maybe she'd still have this chance to go on to do amazing things.

She could be reading the signs wrong. A week was nothing to worry about, not really.

But she wouldn't know for sure until she picked herself up off the ground and looked at the results of her math test.

"I can do this," Rory whispered to herself, clutching the phone tightly in her hand. "I can get up and look at my math test. Any second now, I am going to stand up and look."

"Just remember that no matter what it says, I'm here for you," Lane encouraged.

"It'll all be okay, right?" Rory asked. To her own ears, she sounded a bit like a child, pleading to the one far more experienced in this area for some form of comfort.

"Rory, it'll be fine. Trust me. You just have to _look_."

"Okay." Taking a deep breath, Rory rolled onto her stomach, pushing herself up into a standing position. Her eyes closed tightly involuntarily, trying to put off the inevitable for a couple moments longer.

"Well?" Lane asked.

"Hold on."

Rory took one more breath before looking down at the five sticks lined up neatly in a row on the bathroom counter. They all brandished the same results.

"Oh, god. I'm pregnant."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I know that pregnancy fics can be a bit overdone, but this story would legit not leave me alone. It kept bugging me to write it. I've got a lot of great ideas for how I'm going to do this, so I hope you enjoy it.


	2. Godzilla and Apples

**A/N: **WOW! Can I just say, in all my years of writing fanfiction, I've never gotten such an enthusiastic response from a new story I've written. Those reviews you all left for me are some of the best I've gotten. Thank you all so much for all the positive feedback. Because of you, I put all my other updates on hold in order to bring you a new chapter sooner. Don't expect this kind of treatment all the time! Since I'm currently working on three different stories, all with very enthusiastic readers begging for updates. I won't always stop working on them just to update this one. But I wanted to do a little something for all of you who have left me so many kind reviews, and so I rushed through this update for you.

With that, I hop you enjoy it!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Two – Godzilla and Apples<span>

The first thing Rory did upon reading the positive results of her five pregnancy tests was throw up.

By some miracle, she managed to say goodbye to Lane, hang up her phone, and place it on the counter _before_ actually throwing up. But immediately afterwards, Rory lunged for the toilet seat, emptying the contents of her stomach. She wasn't sure if she was just reacting to the news that she was pregnant, or if she was finally allowing herself to give in to the nausea that she'd been feeling for the past couple of weeks.

When she finally finished, Rory remained seated on the floor, hugging the toilet bowl. She didn't care that it was dirty on the bathroom floor. She felt weak and tired. Tears were streaming silently down her face. She was pregnant. _Pregnant_. With a baby. There was a baby growing inside of her. She didn't want it to be true, but there were five little sticks telling her it was.

The second thing she did, once she was ready to stand again, was clean herself up. Rory took a long, hot shower, letting herself be comforted by the steam as it swirled around her. She closed her eyes and let the water wash all her thoughts away for a couple of minutes. When she got out, Rory put on a fresh pair of pajamas, pulled her damp hair up into a pony tail, and brushed her teeth. Then she got a fresh glass of water from the faucet and crawled under the covers with her cell phone.

She was starting to feel a lot better about the situation, although she was nowhere near okay just yet. Whereas all day her thoughts had been so jumbled Rory couldn't even think straight, she was now beginning to organize them to the point where she was almost ready to make a plan. That thought alone was comforting enough; Rory might be able to deal with this if she could calm down enough to make a list.

At least she was able to say the word now. She was pregnant. It hovered over her like a hawk waiting to attack its prey. Or maybe it was more like a monster out to destroy an entire city, like Godzilla.

The third thing Rory did was call her mother, as promised.

"Well," she said when Lorelai finally answered. "It's been confirmed. I'm pregnant."

There was a slight pause before Lorelai responded. "And you're sure? You didn't read the test wrong?"

"I'm sure." Rory sat up in the bed, hugging one of the extra pillows to her chest. "I'm five pregnancy tests sure. Seriously, if I never have to see a little pink plus sign again for the rest of my life, then that would be okay by me."

"Yeah, those things tend to mock you, don't they? They think the pink makes it all happy, but it doesn't!"

"I can't believe this is happening. I'm _so_ careful! I guess it wasn't enough for…the two of us to break up, was it? What am I going to do, mom? I can't be pregnant! I have a job, a really good job! Now I'm never going to be a real journalist! I can be the girl who answers Christiane Amanpour's fan mail, but that's it! Might as well pack your things up now, Gilmore! Because – "

"Whoa, hun, calm down! Take a deep breath and stop talking for a minute."

Rory obliged. She was trying hard not to spiral, but her mind was working in overdrive.

"First of all, you _will_ still get to do all those things that you want to do; it's just going to take you a bit longer to get there. This is not the end of the world, I promise you. I did when I was much younger than you, and so can you."

But Rory was having trouble believing that. She didn't know that she could really do all of this on her own, the way her mother did. She didn't know that she wanted to, either. She wanted his help. She wanted him to be there for her. She could have had that, too, if she hadn't chosen her career over marriage. Instead, Rory did what she thought was the right thing for her at the time, successfully pushing him away.

She felt as though she had no right to ask him for anything. She made her choice. Now she had to live with it.

"Okay, deep breaths. Deep breaths I can handle."

"Good. See, you're feeling better already, aren't you?"

"If I say yes, will you believe me?"

"Yes."

"Then yeah, I'm feeling better."

"Good." There was another pause as Rory waited for her mother to continue. "Have you talked to Lo – "

"_Don't say his name!_" Rory hissed. "Sorry, Mom, but I'm still processing the pregnancy thing. I can't…I can't think about him."

"You know you're going to have to think about him, right? And talk to him?"

"I know, and I will. Tomorrow. For right now, just call him Larry, please?" Rory begged. This was still all too much for her. She was already used to the idea of being pregnant, but the only way she was able to process that bit of information was by blocking out the image of who the father was. She would put that off until tomorrow, after she'd had time to sleep.

"Larry it is. Have you talked to Larry yet?"

"I'm going to be in his area in about a week, so I'd like to tell him face to face. And then…I don't know. I don't really think I can figure out what to do next until after we talk. But I think…I think I just want to know that he'll be there in this…in this kid's life. I don't want him to be like Dad. I just want to know that he'll work out some sort of defined schedule. That'll be enough."

"Will it really be enough or you, Rory? Is that what you _really_ want?" Lorelai sounded skeptical, like she didn't really believe what her daughter was telling her.

"It'll have to be, mom. It doesn't matter what I want."

"He's probably going to ask you to marry him again."

"Well, I'll just end up saying no again."

She heard Lorelai sigh. "Are you _sure_ – "

"Getting pregnant doesn't change anything! If I'm ever going to get married, it's going to be because I want to, not because I feel obligated. This doesn't change anything. I made my choice. He said it was all or nothing, I chose nothing. Now, I have to deal with the consequences of my decision. This is me dealing with it. We're not going to magically get back together just because I'm pregnant."

There was a pause. "Okay, I have to ask something here, and I don't want you to get mad. But did your saying no to Larry have anything to do with me?"

That question threw Rory a bit. "Why would it have anything to do with you?"

"I don't know. Something Sookie was saying earlier. I'm not exactly a stellar example on relationships. I just don't want the reason you said no to be because you were too scared."

"Mom, no!" Rory insisted. "Look. I said no for a lot of different reasons. And yeah, maybe I was a little scared, but that's just one reason on a long list of reasons that I couldn't say yes. This doesn't change any of them."

They sat in silence for a few moments, giving Rory time to formulate in her mind what she wanted from Him. Her expectations were low. She knew they weren't going to get back together. Being pregnant didn't change what had happened between them. She wasn't going to ask him for financial support of any kind, although on that front, she was pretty sure that he would give it to her anyway. He was still a gentleman, after all, and he'd want to do the right thing. She'd have to put aside her feelings for him, knowing that they'd only complicate things. That would be the hardest part to deal with. Rory knew she'd want to call him for support every time she needed something, but she couldn't do that. She chose to be on her own, so that's what she'd do. The _only_ thing she wanted from him was for him to be a constant presence in her child's life. That would have to be good enough.

"Mom, I'm really tired. This has been a lot to process. I just want to go to sleep and deal with the rest of it in the morning."

"No problem, kid. Get some rest, we'll talk more later."

"Thanks. And…thanks for not getting mad at me. For being pregnant, I mean."

"Oh, kid," Lorelai said with a sigh. "I know this didn't happen on purpose. You're a smart girl; you'll come up with a plan."

Yes, she would. But that would have to wait until tomorrow.

* * *

><p>Unfortunately for Rory, she only managed to sleep for an hour before Claire came back. It wasn't the sound of Claire's return that woke her, but the shrill scream coming from the bathroom.<p>

Rory shot out of bed, running to make sure Claire was okay. "What's wrong?"

The bathroom door was closed, but Claire yanked it opened, staring at Rory in disbelief. "What?" Rory asked.

But she didn't need Claire to explain herself. Sitting there on the bathroom counter were the five pregnancy tests Rory had taken earlier. She had forgotten to remove the evidence.

"Oh my god!"

Rory sighed, turning away from Claire and returning to her bed, burrowing deep under the covers.

"You're _pregnant_?" She heard Claire ask, Claire's voice slightly muffled due to the sheets pulled over Rory's head.

She pushed the covers away from her face and looked up at Claire, who was now sitting on the opposite bed. "Yes. Apparently."

"Oh my god!" Rory really wished that Claire would stop saying that. "I didn't even know you were seeing anyone."

Now, Rory _really_ wished that she wasn't having this conversation; she couldn't handle it. "I'm not. Not anymore."

"Then who – "

"My ex boyfriend," Rory explained. "We broke up right before I took this job."

"He didn't break up with you because you wanted to go on the road. Did he?"

Rory shook her head, pushing herself into a sitting position. Despite the fact that she didn't really want to be talking about this, she realized that Claire wasn't going to let this go without some kind of background information. "No, it was nothing like that. He'd just gotten this new job in California and he wanted me to follow him out there, but as his fiancée. But I had just graduated from Yale, and I wasn't ready for that. I needed time to figure things out; work on starting my career. He didn't want to wait, so we ended things."

"Oh my god, oh my god."

"Please stop saying, 'oh my god.'"

"Sorry. It's just…does he _know_ yet?"

Rory shook her head. "I'm going to call him tomorrow; try to convince him to see me when we're at that event at Stanford."

They sat in uncomfortable silence for a while. It wasn't that Rory didn't like Claire; she was a nice enough girl, and probably the person she talked to the most on the bus. The problem was that Rory didn't really know Claire. She was uncomfortable sharing this much of herself with a complete stranger.

"Are you okay?" Claire asked. Rory's unease must have read on her face. It wasn't that surprising really; Rory had been acting off all day.

Rory shrugged. "I will be."

* * *

><p>Rory didn't sleep much that night, her mind flooded with dreams about Him. She couldn't turn them off; it was like her brain was a TV and he was on every channel.<p>

She dreamt about the day at the Life and Death Brigade gathering, where he had somehow convinced her to jump off of a seven story scaffold with him. He'd grabbed her hand just before they jumped, and as they floated back down to earth, the wind rushing by, she had started to think that there was something more going on between them than just witty banter and a few sarcastic comments.

She dreamt about the night of her grandparent's vow renewal, when they'd first decided to begin dating. He had been right when he told her that they would be something right away. Even when they were still seeing other people, they were always _something_. She thought about him getting jealous when she went out with someone else, someone who wasn't him. He wanted them to leave together, go to New York, and blow off everyone else. She thought about him pulling away from her shortly after that, but refusing to let go when she tried to break it off completely. Because, at the time, he couldn't let go. He had wanted to be with her too much.

That had changed, obviously. He didn't want to be with her enough to wait for her to be ready to move forward.

She dreamt about the times he surprised her by showing up unannounced. He never liked to announce his visits, always preferring to see the surprised look on her face over letting her count down the days until they saw each other again. It was sweet, the way he was always surprising her by being unexpected.

And then, when she had exhausted dreaming of all the good times, she started dreaming about how he'd react to the news. She imagined his anger. She imagined him telling her that he never wanting to see her again, and refusing to have any part in her pregnancy. Deep down, Rory knew that wouldn't happen. She told herself that he would want to do the right thing. He'd want to be the kind of father that his own father never was. She would deal with whatever anger he felt towards her (because she was positive he'd be angry at her for turning down his marriage proposal), just as long as he promised to come around more often than her own father had. She wanted a set schedule. She wanted to be able to tell her child when he would be there, and have him show up. She didn't want him to be a Holidays only kind of father.

She was sure that, at the very least, he would be able to do that one thing for her. It was the only thing she'd ask of him.

But first she needed to call him and set up a meeting.

Rory woke up late that morning, a note from Claire sitting on the nightstand.

_Rory – _

_I figured you'd want to have some privacy to call the ex, so I went out early to get some breakfast with the others. I'll stay out all morning, so you can have the room to yourself. I even put up the "Do Not Disturb" sign so housekeeping won't bother you. Good luck!_

– _Claire_

_P.S. I brought you some breakfast – eat something! _

There was an apple sitting next to the note. Rory smiled. Claire had correctly guessed that, due to Rory's current state, apples were suddenly the most delicious food on the planet to her. She ate the fruit gladly; the contents of her stomach having been emptied the night before, and Rory was starving.

She smiled as she ate the apple. She may not be best friends with Claire or anything, but the girl was certainly behaving like one.

Rory stalled for as long as possible. She took a shower, despite having taken one the night before. She dried her hair. She read the complimentary paper that had been left outside the door to her hotel room. Finally, having run out of things to do, she sat down on her bed, picked up her cell phone, and dialed his number.

Her heart was beating frantically in her chest as she listened to the sound of the phone ringing.

"Huntzberger," was the curt answer.

It was the first time she'd heard his voice in weeks. Her pulse quickened.

"Logan," she said with a sigh, her voice breaking slightly. "Hey, it's Rory."

* * *

><p>It wasn't easy for Logan, moving across the country and starting a new job. But then again, he had never expected that he'd be doing this on his own.<p>

He got the idea to propose to Rory while he was in California having meetings with the guys whose company he now currently worked for. A secretary had just come into the conference room to refresh everyone's coffee when his mind began to wander. He wasn't daydreaming about anything specific really; just the image of Rory standing in the kitchen of his old apartment in New York wearing nothing but one of his button up shirts as her hands wrapped around a steaming mug of coffee. Her eyes fluttered closed in delight as she took a sip, a small smile spreading across her lips. He remembered thinking that she looked beautiful. She had then caught Logan staring at her, her face flushing in embarrassment.

The other guys had given him a funny look at the goofy grin on Logan's face as he remembered what could otherwise be thought of as an insignificant moment in their lives, but it was really a turning point for Logan. When the meetings closed that day, with promises to have contracts ready to sign by the next morning, Logan knew what he had to do. He needed to make sure Rory would come here with him. He wanted to be able to wake up to her next to him every morning, drinking coffee in _their_ kitchen while she wore his shirts. And he couldn't wait to make that happen.

He wondered why it had taken him so long to realize that she was the _only_ girl he wanted to be with. But once he came to that realization, Logan knew that he couldn't wait any longer. He had to make her his wife, and he had to do it now.

So immediately after leaving the meeting, Logan drove to a jewelry store. He spent an hour sizing up different rings before finally settling on the perfect one. He was already formulating the proposal plan in his mind. Now that he had come to the realization that he wanted to marry Rory Gilmore, he wanted to let everyone know. There wasn't a doubt in his mind; he was so sure that she would say yes.

Of course, it hadn't worked out that way. Rory wanted to keep her wide open future. She wanted to do long distance. To Logan, she may as well have said that she no longer wanted to be with him. What was stopping her from having that wide open future with him in California? He would _never_ hold her back, she had to know that! If she wasn't ready now, would she ever be?

He had never hated a piece of jewelry more in his entire life than that ring when she handed it back to him. This is what he got for falling in love. It was his own fault, really. He had been resistant to the idea of Them since the very beginning, always one step behind Rory. She had been the one to admit to her feelings first. She'd kissed him first. She'd said 'I love you' first. And now, when Logan was finally the one to make himself vulnerable first, she shot him down.

He should have known better. His entire life had been about keeping him from exactly this situation happening. And then Rory had come along and changed everything. He was so sure that they were on the same wavelength with this one. He thought for sure that she wanted to be his wife, that she loved him just as much as he loved her. Instead, she said no. He couldn't stay with her after that.

Soon, his sadness turned into anger. How could she turn him down, after everything they'd been through? After the way he'd opened himself up to her emotionally? Logan had never opened up to _anyone_ before Rory. He often fought it tooth and nail, and right when he finally was willingly handing her his heart, she gave it right back to him. 'No thanks,' she said. 'I don't want to move to California with you, so I'm not going to.'

He thought she was being selfish. And he hated her for that.

Of course, he still missed her, but it was all rather bittersweet. He was more struck by the loneliness that the absence of her presence created. He was constantly reminded of her choice not to be with him. He moved into the house he picked out for the two of them alone. Every day he woke up to an empty bed. He started his new job, and he didn't have her to come home to and talk about this new chapter in his life. She was the one who had encouraged him to do this in the first place, who made him believe that he even _could_ do this. But then she chose not to be part of it. She had to do her own thing, separate from him. He hated her for not wanting to experience this with him.

Well, fine. If Rory didn't want to be with him any longer, he didn't want her to be in his life anymore either. So Logan had deleted all of her contact information and thrown out everything he owned that reminded him of her. No pictures remained. He didn't even have a single memento left of her. This is what she wanted, a life separate from his own. He started by removing her completely.

Logan was already in a foul mood that morning as he made his way into the office. He had been up late fielding phone calls about the project that he was working on, because apparently he was the _only_ person able to deal with the issue they were having, and the problem couldn't wait until morning. It was frustrating, especially considering the fact that the project had just gotten started, and already he was being harassed at all hours of the night to deal with problems. Because of that, Logan had decided to come in late that day. He'd have to a discussion with his team about the many phone calls; they needed to figure out how to work things out without him, so that they wouldn't be calling him with every little hiccup.

"Morning, Tracy," Logan said as he walked by his assistant and into his office. Tracy was in her mid 30s with two little boys, ages 3 and five. She was a sweet woman, always inviting him over to her house so her and her husband could cook dinner for him. She always worried that he wasn't eating enough.

Tracy already looked a little frazzled as she followed him into his office, a stack of papers in her arms.

"Mike and George have been calling all morning," she told Logan, placing the stack on his desk.

Logan sighed. "Of course they have. They can't do _anything_ on their own. Can you send out an email to the whole team requesting a meeting at one?"

Tracy nodded. "Also, IT called. The server keeps crashing; it's being overloaded. You need to meet with them to coordinate everything. They're getting really tired of me calling them to fix things."

"Give them a call; tell them to come by when they can. Anything else?"

Tracy hesitated. "Jessica from HR has been bugging me to get an update from you. I can put her off if you want."

"Please do," Logan said gratefully. "I've told her a hundred times that she'll get an update when I have one to give her."

"Not a problem."

Just then, his cell phone started ringing. He didn't recognize the number, but then again, Logan still hadn't programmed everyone's phone number into his cell phone just yet. He sighed heavily at the sound.

"It never ends," Logan muttered.

"I'll bring you some coffee," Tracy said with a sympathetic smile as she backed out of his office. He nodded in thanks as she closed the door behind her.

"Huntzberger."

There was no response at first.

"Logan," said a hesitant voice. He'd recognize that voice anyway. "Hey, it's Rory."

At first his heart speed up. _Rory_. It was good to hear her voice again. He couldn't deny the fact that he missed her; it hadn't even been that long. But she'd made her decision loud and clear to him; she wanted her wide open future, not him.

Anger surged through his veins. She had no right to be calling him right now.

He hung up the phone quickly, not giving her the chance to say anything else.


	3. Desperate Times

**A/N: **I'm sorry this update took so long! In all honesty, updates on all of my stories are probably going to slow down a bit for the time being. My semester started up again last week, so things have been a bit hectic, what with getting used to a new set of courses. But I'm trying to find the time to work on all of my stories, so don't think that I've abandoned them! You'll just have to be a bit more patient in waiting between chapters.

So on that note, I bring you chapter three!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Three – Desperate Times<span>

Rory was numb, there was no other way to describe it. She'd expected Logan to be angry, to refuse to speak to her. But she didn't think that he'd flat out hang up on her, thus making it impossible for her to even set up some way to see him.

She felt slightly disheartened, but she wasn't going to give up that easily. She had to let him know.

Rory waited a minute before calling him back. This time, his voicemail picked up immediately.

"Logan, hey. Look, I know you're mad at me. I'm sure you never want to speak to me again, and I understand that. But I really need to talk to you about something, it's important. I'm…I'm not hurt or anything. I just really need to speak with you. Please, if you can just…" She paused, swallowing the lump that was forming in her throat. "I'm going to be in your area on Sunday covering Obama's rally at Stanford. I'd really like to meet for coffee or something afterwards so we can talk. I won't be in town for very long, I leave the following morning. Please just give me a call back so we can set something up. It's _really important_ that we talk." Rory didn't really know what else to say. She hoped she'd impressed upon him how important it was that he call her back, but Logan was stubborn. He might not care. "Well, I guess that's all I had to say. I hope you're doing well…I just want you to be okay. And…I hope we'll talk soon. So. Bye."

When Rory didn't hear back from Logan by the next day, she decided she had to take drastic measures. There were three people she could call who might possibly help her, although she highly doubted that any of them would do so willingly. At the very least they wouldn't hang up on her the way Logan had, but that wasn't saying much.

She was clinging desperately to this need to talk to Logan; it was her lifeline. She had no real plans formulated yet, no ideas as to what she would do next. She didn't know where she'd live, or what she'd do about her job situation. Rory was particularly trying hard not to think about what this meant for her career. She was terrified that getting pregnant meant she'd never get to be a real reporter, that everything she'd worked so hard for was about to fly out the window. The only plan she had was to talk to Logan and ask him to find some way to be part of her child's life. If she couldn't even get him to do that, she'd have to face the crushing reality of what came next alone, always wondering what kind of father he could have been. She didn't want that at all.

So the next day, after she piled back onto the bus, Rory dragged herself to the back seat to claim the Phone Booth to make a humiliating phone call, begging the closest people in Logan's life for help.

Her first call was to Colin. He was usually fairly rational, so Rory's hope as that she could talk some sense into him. On the downside, he was incredibly loyal to Logan.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Rory Gilmore," Colin said upon answering the phone.

"Hey, Colin," she replied, letting go of the breath he'd been holding. At the very least, he didn't sound mad. But then again, he also didn't sound too thrilled either.

"I have to say, I'm a little surprised to be hearing from you," he continued. "Is there any particular reason behind this phone call?"

"Desperate times call for desperate measures, my friend." She bit her lower lip. She was nervous. "Look, Colin. I'm sure I'm one of the last people you consider doing a favor for, but I need your help."

He didn't respond right away, as though he was weighing his options. "What do you want, Rory?"

She took a deep breath, trying to steady her breathing. "I need you to talk to Logan for me."

"No."

"Colin, it's important."

"I say again: no."

"You don't understand the situation!" she practically whined. "It's really important that I get in contact with him, but he won't return my phone calls. Please, Colin. I'm practically on my knees begging you here. You know I wouldn't ask you this if it wasn't really important."

"If it's so important," said Colin, "then you won't mind telling me why you need to talk to him so badly."

She couldn't tell him. If Logan was going to find out she was pregnant, then it was going to be from her, and her alone. Colin didn't have any right to know this piece of information. But she had to tell him _something_, otherwise she wouldn't get him on her side.

"I..." Rory stuttered. "I…I really can't….I can't say."

"You know what I think?" Colin asked. "I think that you want Logan to take you back, even though you _turned down his marriage proposal_, and you're so desperate that you're going to beg his friends to talk to him for you."

"No! Colin, I swear, that's not it at all!"

"Then tell me what it is, Rory! Otherwise, you're out of luck."

Her silence was answer enough.

"Goodbye, Rory."

Perhaps this was a bad idea. Maybe she should have found some other way to get in contact with Logan. Maybe she could find some way to track down his address and show up on his doorstep, forcing him to talk to her. Unfortunately, Rory didn't know how she'd go about doing that, leaving Rory with no choice other than to continue making these humiliating phone calls.

That first failed phone call managed to freak Rory out about being pregnant even more than she already was. She wasn't ready to have a _baby_! She couldn't do it! She had so many things left to do in her life. She could see her career disappearing before her eyes; it would never happen now that she was going to have a baby. On top of that, Rory was now going to become a single mother. Her mother had worked so hard to give her every opportunity so that Rory would _never_ have to go through what she went through. And now, despite all that careful planning, despite the fact that Rory had taken every precaution, Rory was pregnant. With a baby. That she would have to raise alone. And she might not even get to tell Logan, the father, about it.

Her hands were shaking slightly as she called Finn next. Perhaps she shouldn't have even bothered calling Finn at all, because trying to reason with a less than sober Finn early in the morning was like trying to reason with a brick wall.

"What?" groaned Finn as he answered the phone.

"Um. Finn, hey. It's Rory."

There was a slightly muffled sound coming from the phone as she waited for a response. Rory assumed Finn was attempting to get his bearings before speaking with her.

"Rory Gilmore, as I live and breathe," he finally said. "To what do I owe this pleasure?"

Rory rolled her eyes at Finn's tone, smiling slightly at his politeness. Despite his sudden change in tone, he could not mask his hangover from her, not even over the phone. "I need a favor."

"Of course you do, love. I take it this favor is of the Huntzberger variety."

Was it really that obvious? "I really need to talk to him, Finn. Please, it's important."

She heard him sigh. "I hate to break it to you, love, but he doesn't really want to speak with you at the moment. And to be quite honest, I can't really blame him."

"Yeah, I kind of picked up on that when he hung up on me. And from my unreturned phone calls."

Rory appreciated Finn's frankness. He'd always had a bit of a soft spot for her. Whereas it was obvious that Colin was playing the role of loyal best friend, Finn was making it clear that he didn't want to get into the middle of whatever was going on between Rory and Logan.

"Well then, I suggest that you take the hint and leave him alone."

"I can't do that, Finn."

"Why not?"

"Because I can't!" Rory cried, fighting back the tears that were threatening to fall down her cheeks.

"Look, love. I want to help you, I really do. But if Logan doesn't want to talk to you right now, there's not really much I can say to him to convince him otherwise."

She wished that there was more she could give him, that there was some way she could convince Finn to help her out. But just like she couldn't tell Colin, she couldn't let Finn know the reason behind her desperate attempts to contact Logan.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I wish I could tell you why…"

There was a long silence. "Just let things cool down a bit. Try again when he's not so angry."

But Rory didn't have the luxury of waiting. She was pretty much banking on Logan's reaction to help her decide what to do next. She was putting her entire decision making process on hold until she spoke with Logan. She needed to let him know, needed to tell him. She was incapable of even making a list to figure out what needed to be done next until spoke with Logan. She was stuck, clinging desperately to this one thing because she wasn't ready to face anything else just yet.

"Thanks anyway, Finn," she said, her voice breaking. She hoped that he wasn't able to discern how upset she was.

"Bye, Rory."

The last person on her list of phone calls also happened to be the one person she hoped she didn't have to beg for help: Logan's sister Honor.

* * *

><p>Logan was barely fazed by the voicemail Rory lad left for him, deleting it without even bothering to listen. In all honesty, he didn't want to hear whatever it was she had to say. He wanted to talk to her, he really did, but it was too soon. Everything was still too recent, the wounds left from her denial still too fresh. He'd barely had time to get over her. He was still far too hurt and angry, his ego too bruised for him to talk to her again. Not now, anyway. The only way he could move on was to cut her out completely, so that's what he planned on doing. After deleting Rory's message, he put all thoughts of her from his mind, concentrating instead on the busy day ahead of him.<p>

So he was surprised, of course, when Colin called him and brought up the subject of his recent ex girlfriend.

"You'll never guess who I just got off the phone with," Colin said the morning after Rory's attempted contact with Logan.

"The President," Logan guessed sarcastically. He was in a good mood that morning, a much better one than he had been the day before. He'd managed to fix most of the problems going wrong with his project after a busy day of meetings, and he hadn't received a single call that night with a panicked employee informing him of something else that was going wrong, meaning Logan had actually slept through the night.

"Not exactly. Rory Gilmore."

His good mood disappeared. "Oh," Logan responded coldly.

"You're not curious as to why she called?" Colin asked.

"Not really, no."

"She seemed pretty desperate," he continued. "Said she needed to talk to you, but wouldn't tell me why."

"Well, good for her."

"Come on, man. Why don't you just hear what she has to say?"

"Because I don't really care what she has to say. You didn't promise her you'd get me to talk, did you? Because I'm not interested in what she wants right now."

"Don't be an idiot, of course not! I'm just curious as to why she'd go to such lengths to talk to you, but won't tell anyone why."

Logan sighed. His curiosity was piqued a little, but not enough to actually give in and return her phone call. "Did she call Finn too?"

"Yeah, and she was just as tight lipped. Won't tell us anything, but she seemed pretty upset."

Logan hesitated before finally asking the question that was on his mind. "You don't think…she's not hurt or anything, is she?" Despite himself, he was a little worried. He hated to think that he might be dodging phone calls telling him that she or someone in her family was in the hospital.

"Honestly? I think that if something was really wrong, she would have said something. Look, man. I know you're mad at her, and I don't expect you to actually talk to her. I just thought you'd want to know that she contacted us."

That didn't change anything in Logan's mind. As long as she wasn't hurt, he didn't see any reason why he should talk to her. He didn't want her in his life right now. He didn't want to hear any apologies she might be trying to offer. Logan was trying to build a new life out in Palo Alto, one that was not going to include her. That had been her choice, not his. He wasn't going to cave in and talk to her. He couldn't.

* * *

><p>"Hey Honor, it's Rory."<p>

"Rory, hey!" At the very least, it was comforting to hear Honor's enthusiasm. Honor had always loved Rory; sometimes she thought that Logan's sister liked Rory more than she liked her own brother. Honor had taken Rory's side when the two had separated briefly, and had always stood up for Rory during awkward family encounters.

Rory didn't want to give Honor the chance to say how sorry she was about the breakup. Frankly, Rory didn't think she could take hearing about it. So she rushed out what she needed to say before giving Honor the chance to weigh in her opinion of the situation, her words coming out quickly, hardly giving her time to think about what she was even saying.

"Look, I know that I have no right to ask you for help, but I'm getting desperate here. I need to talk to Logan, but he either hangs up when I call or he ignores me completely. And I get it, he's angry at me. But this is so _important_, and Colin and Finn wouldn't help me, and I can't get Logan to even return my calls. So I'm begging you, _please_, is there anything you can do to get him to just talk to me?"

There was a very long silence as Rory waited for Honor's response. Her heart was pounding in her chest, Rory was surprised that Honor could not hear it through the phone.

"My brother's a very stubborn person, Rory," Honor said seriously.

"I know that," Rory answered, her eyes welling up with tears. She felt dejected; she could already hear Honor telling her no.

"So I don't really know what I could say to him that would convince him to talk to you. Not unless you give me some more information."

Rory was about to tell Honor that she couldn't do that when she stopped herself. Perhaps Colin and Finn didn't have a right to know, but Honor was Logan's sister. The situation was completely different. Rory couldn't get Logan to hear her out. At least one Huntzberger, the one who wasn't currently ignoring her attempts at contact, deserved to know the truth. After all, this effected Honor's life as well.

But she was worried that Honor would tell Logan for her, and that was something she did not want. If Logan was going to find out that Rory was pregnant, she was going to hear it from her and her alone.

"If I tell you," Rory said, "then I need you to promise me that you won't tell Logan."

"Rory, I don't think – "

"Honor, _please_!"

Rory hated begging, but she was on her last option. She didn't know what else she could do.

"Alright, I promise. What's this all about?"

Rory swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat. "I'm pregnant."

She heard a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the phone. "Oh my god, Rory – "

"I'm okay," she continued quickly, trying to convince herself as much as Honor. "I found out a couple of days ago."

"And Logan wouldn't even talk to you?"

"He just...hung up on me after I said hello. I want to…I want to tell him in person." Her voice was shaking. She was unable to keep herself from crying any more. "I'm going to be in Palo Alto on Sunday for work, but I'm leaving the next morning. I just…I really need to tell him, Honor." She was full out sobbing at this point. She couldn't hold the floodgates back anymore. Every fear she'd been having was spewing out, unable to be held back anymore "I don't know what else to do. I don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. I gave up _everything_ to be a journalist. I put my career first because I had to, and now? I screwed everything up, and Logan won't even talk to me! And now I'm going to have to give up my job, and I'll never be a reporter! I get to meet Christiane Amanpour, but I'll never get to be her! My entire life I've only ever wanted this one thing, and now I'll never get it because I chose my career over my relationship. Logan won't talk to me; he's _never_ going to talk to me again, so not only will I never get to be a reporter, but my child will never know its father! I don't _want_ that! I don't want it to have the life I had! I just want him to _know_, Honor! I have to tell him! I don't know what I'm going to do, but I _have_ to tell Logan!"

She hadn't meant to pour her heart out like that, but Rory couldn't help it. She'd been holding everything back, trying to remain as calm and rational as possible, but the road block she hit in talking to Logan had brought to the surface all her worries.

Honor sat there in silence, giving Rory a chance to calm down a bit.

"I'm sorry," Rory finally said. "I didn't mean to dump on you like that.

"Don't worry about it," said Honor.

"Look," Rory went on, whipping the tears from her eyes. "I'm not asking for anything from Logan. I don't want any money. I just wanted him to know so that he can find some way to be a part of this kid's life. That's all. Will you help me?"

Honor sighed. "Rory – "

"You can't tell him!" Rory blurted out. "He needs to hear it from me."

"I don't know if I can keep this from him, Rory. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to convince him to talk to you without telling him why."

"Honor, please? I know it's a lot to ask, but I don't know what else to do here. Look, if you can't convince him, then I'll figure something else out. And if I still can't convince him to talk to me, then at least when my child asks me why its father's not around, I'll be able to honestly say that I exhausted every option. But this isn't something he can hear from someone else. Do you at least understand that?"

"I do," Honor said with another sigh. "I'm sorry that my brother's such a stubborn idiot. He'll kick himself if he finds out later that he has a kid that he doesn't know about because he wouldn't answer your phone calls."

"I won't keep _you_ away, if that's the case," Rory told her. "I'd…I'd really like this baby to know at least one person on your side of the family."

Roy was beginning to recognize defeat, realizing that there wasn't much Honor could do to help her. It wasn't a surprise, really. She didn't know what she had been thinking by desperately calling the three people closest to Logan, begging them for help.

"I get it; you're not going to be able to convince Logan to see me without telling him why. This was a stupid idea anyway. Thanks for your help, Honor, but I should probably go – "

"Rory, wait!"

Rory stopped before she hung up.

"I'm going to give you his address," Honor told her. "I think that's your best option. If he still won't hear you out after showing up on his doorstep, then I don't know what else will work."

Rory had to agree. Logan's preferred method of getting Rory to talk when she was angry with him had always been to overwhelm her by simply showing up wherever she was unannounced. He would be a hypocrite if he wouldn't talk to her then.

"Thank you, Honor," Rory said with a sigh of relief, her panic at never being able to talk to Logan lifting slightly. "You don't know how much this means to me."

"Don't worry about it," Honor said sincerely. "Keep me posted, okay? Even if Logan decides to be an idiot and not talk to you."

As Rory wrote down Logan's address, she began to calm herself down. She didn't want to think about this anymore. She had the next few days to imagine every possible outcome. After hanging up with Honor and returning to her seat, Rory tried her best not to think about what would happen when she finally got the chance to speak with Logan.


	4. Promises

**A/N: **These two have been pretty much talking non stop in my head since I posted the last chapter, demanding that I write this one. So here it is!

And now, I must run off and do the studying I've been putting off all afternoon. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Four – Promises<span>

Rory was having trouble concentrating on the speech that Senator Obama was giving at Stanford that day. But then again, that wasn't anything new. She'd been having a lot of trouble paying attention lately when it came to her work.

The impending confrontation she was about to have with Logan remained a constant presence in her mind. She was nervous about seeing him again. She was nervous about telling him she was pregnant. She was nervous about how he would react to finding out that she's pregnant. Rory had time to imagine every possible outcome of the situation; from him begging her to marry him to him denying paternity and slamming the door in her face. Of course, she doubted that the latter would actually happen, but that didn't keep her from imagining the worst.

As if she wasn't already worried enough, morning sickness had officially settled in. Now that she had given herself over to the reality that she was pregnant, accepting the fact that her nausea wasn't motion sickness related, Rory found that most of her mornings (and many of her evenings) included lying on the bathroom floor after throwing up.

Hiding her pregnancy from the other reporters was also becoming increasingly difficult. While Rory was definitely not showing yet, it was hard to keep from such an observant group her odd behavior. It did not go unnoticed the fact that she rarely paid attention to what anyone else was saying anymore; she was so preoccupied with her own thoughts that Rory would often space out mid conversation.

She didn't know how much longer she'd be able to keep her job either. The erratic sleep schedule that came with being on the road did not help matters. Soon she'd need to see a doctor. And once she finally quit her job, she didn't know what she'd do for money, or where she'd live. But she dreaded emailing Hugo with the news that she was quitting, and so Rory put it off, telling herself that she'd figure out what to do after she talked to Logan. She felt unable to even make a pro/con list about what her options were until after Logan knew.

Time was playing tricks on her as the moment when she would tell him grew closer. When she was on the bus heading towards the Stanford event and dreading what she'd say to Logan, time speed up. When she was actually at the event and wanted nothing more than for it to be over, time moved at snail's pace. She waited impatiently to head back to the bus when the event was over, and checking into the hotel seemed to take longer than usual that afternoon. When Rory finally dumped her bags into her room, she didn't even bother to change out of the suit and heels she'd been wearing before hurrying downstairs to get a cab. She immediately regretted that decision as she gave the taxi driver Logan's address, dreading what would happen at the end of the car ride.

She didn't even notice when the cab pulled up in front of the house. The driver had to practically yell at her to get her attention. She didn't care that he must have thought her crazy. She handed him a fist full of bills, not really checking to see what she was handing him, and then made her way up the walkway to the front door.

She stared at it for full ten minutes. Then, taking a deep breath, she rang the bell.

* * *

><p>Logan had actually slept that night. It had been a while since he'd gotten the chance to sleep in, even on the weekend. Ever since moving to Palo Alto and starting his new job, work often followed him home from the office. However, he had been unable to hide the exhaustion in his voice when his sister called to check in with him on Saturday. He had been dragged into the office to take care of a problem. What was supposed to take an hour to fix had turned into one problem after another, and before long Logan was ordering takeout for his entire team so they could work through dinner. Honor happened to call him as he was digging into a container of Chinese food.<p>

"Where are you anyway?" she asked him. "It sounds noisy."

"I'm at the office."

"On a Saturday? Who are you, and what have you done with my brother?"

Logan chuckled. "I had to come in for an hour, and that became five hours. And that became dinner. You get the idea."

"You're starting to sound like Dad."

That statement irked him. "Hey!"

"I'm serious, Logan. I know you're at a new job and getting on your feet is taking some time, but have you even had a full day off since you moved? You sound exhausted!"

There was no use hiding it from his sister. Not that he had minded the work, really. In fact, Logan was really enjoying it. He was tired, sure, but keeping busy was the best way for him to keep his mind off of certain other people he didn't necessarily want to be thinking about at the moment.

"You sound like my secretary," Logan said as he shoved some Chinese food into his mouth. "She thinks I don't delegate enough."

"Well there you go! Listen to her and take the day off. I insist." Honor then went on to threaten to send someone to physically restrain him to his bed so he wouldn't go into the office on Sunday, after which Logan finally gave in and agreed to stay home on Sunday.

He had to admit, it had been nice sleeping in for a change. He had turned his cell phone off so that no one could call him with a problem, and somehow, Logan had managed to sleep to a respectable 9am. Then, for the first time since moving to Palo Alto, he found the time to eat breakfast sitting at the table while reading the morning paper, go for a run, and take a shower all before lunch time. He got to watch TV on the new flat screen he'd purchased when he moved in, another thing he hadn't done before. Logan was just getting around to unpacking the last of the boxes he had still yet to unpack when the doorbell rang.

He signed in frustration. Of course, despite the fact that Logan had turned off his phone, hadn't been answering his email, and had expressly forbidden anyone in the office from bothering him today, someone on the weekend crew must have decided that whatever was going wrong could not possibly wait until Monday for Logan to fix. After being dragged into the office on Saturday, whoever was currently bothering him had better have a very good explanation for coming to his house on his day off.

Logan pulled the door open to find the last person he expected to see standing on his doorstep.

His heartbeat sped up as he took in the sight of his nervous looking ex girlfriend. She was shifting from one foot to the other, dressed up in a nice looking suit, as though she'd just come from work. His body tensed as he stared down at her, unable to speak.

Rory bit down on her lower lip nervously. Logan had looked annoyed when he opened the door, and that annoyance didn't go away when he realized she was standing there. Rory's insides turned to ice as he stared down at her. God, did she miss him.

"Hi," she finally said, twisting her hands together.

Logan recovered from the shock quickly. "What are you doing here, Rory?"

"I needed to talk to you."

"No, I mean what are you doing _here_, on my door step, in California?"

Rory had to guess that Logan hadn't even bothered to listen to the voicemail she left him. She wasn't too surprised. If the speed at which Logan had hung up on her was any indication, he was pretty angry with her.

"I told you, I needed to talk to you. As for why I'm in California, I got a job reporting on Barak Obama's presidential campaign. He had a rally at Stanford this morning. And since you wouldn't take my calls…" Rory shrugged, folding her arms over her chest. "I really need to talk to you," she finished softly.

"But how did you even…" Logan's voice trailed off as he played back the events of the past week. First Rory tries to call him personally. Then she goes after Logan's friends. Then Honor calls Logan and insists that he stay home on Sunday. Rory must have called Honor and convinced her to hand over Logan's address. It made sense; Honor had always liked Rory. If anyone could convince Honor to go behind Logan's back, it was Rory.

"Honor gave you my address," he stated flatly.

Rory nodded. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…don't be mad at Honor; she was just trying to do the right thing. I really needed to talk to you, and since you've been making that difficult…I had to go to Honor."

"Yeah?" He rolled his eyes, almost amused. How dare she put this on him, like it was _his_ fault that he didn't want to talk to Rory. He wasn't the one who turned down _her_ marriage proposal! "Well, I don't really want to talk to you, Rory! I thought I made that perfectly clear."

"Logan, please."

"No."

"Look, this won't take long – "

"I don't care, Rory!" How could she not understand? Her being there was too painful for him to deal with. He couldn't move on with his life if she kept popping up every time she needed something. "Don't you get it? I can't do this, Rory! I can't. So just leave. Go back to your hotel, back to your _job_, and go live the life you wanted."

Rory flinched at the harsh way he said 'job.' It was as though he was trying to hurt her for wanting to explore her career options before settling down. The word stabbed at her sharply, gutting her.

She shook her head. "I can't leave, Logan. We need to talk, and we need to do it now."

Logan laughed. "I don't want to hear whatever it is you have to say, Rory."

She starred daggers at him. He had forgotten how harsh those angry looks of hers could be. Her blue eyes, usually filled with such warmth, could pierce the skin when she wanted them to. "I can't leave until you listen."

"Well then, I guess you'll be waiting out here for a long time." He moved to close the door on her.

Rory started to panic. She didn't want to just yell it at him, but she wasn't sure how else she could convince him to let her inside. "Don't you think you're being a little unfair?" she said quickly.

That stopped him. Logan pulled the door back opened, and stared back at her incredulously. "_I'm_ being unfair? Did you forget that almost a month ago, I asked you to _marry_ me? You turned me down, Rory! You turned me down so you could have your wide opened future. Well, I'm sorry if you can't handle the fact that that future is without me, but you made your choice. You're going to have to accept that."

"I get it, okay!" she said angrily. "But this is how it works with us. Every time that I'm mad at you and you have something to say, you show up wherever I am and force me to listen to you. Even when I don't want to hear it. You follow me around, you go to my mother, you buy me a coffee cart, you fly down to North Carolina. And you wait me out until I have no choice but to listen to whatever it is you have to say. Well, I have something to say, Logan. And unfortunately, I don't have the luxury of being able to follow you around until you let me say it, because I have to leave in the morning and this can't wait. And I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but I need you to hear this!"

She paused for a minute, giving herself a chance to catch her breath. Clearly Logan wasn't in a very receptive mood; he must be much angrier than Rory anticipated. She had been hoping to ask him to have some form of involvement in her child's life, but that was out of the question now. Logan was right; she had made her choice, and now she needed to live with it. She would just tell him, and let him make his own decision about what he wanted to do. She had no right asking anything of him. "Look. All I'm asking is for you to hear me out. If, when I'm done, you never want to see or speak to me again, I will walk away and that will be the end of it. But _please_ let me say what I need to say before you make that choice!"

Logan studied her carefully. Of course, he was angry. He felt hurt and betrayed by her, and he didn't really have any desire to continue talking with her. But she was also right. Any time she was angry with him and wouldn't talk to him, Logan would stop at nothing until she at the very least heard him out. Rory was only doing exactly what Logan had done in the past, in her own way.

He noticed how upset she looked, like the strain of trying to convince him to talk to her was taking a heavy toll. Despite himself, he still hated to see her in pain.

"Fine," he said, resolving to let her inside and then be done with the matter. If this is what he needed to do in order to remove her from his life completely, then so be it. He wished it didn't have to be that way, but just seeing her now had shown him that he couldn't have it both ways; he cared about her too much.

Rory felt relief wash over her as she followed him inside. She tried not to look around too much as she followed him through the house that could have been theirs. She didn't want to dwell on it.

"Still unpacking?" Rory asked nervously as she noticed the boxes on the coffee table.

Logan shrugged, sitting down on the couch. He didn't really want to answer her.

"Do you…do you like your new job?" Rory knew she was stalling, but she couldn't help it. She didn't know how to broach the subject. This was different than telling her mom, or Lane, or even Honor. This is the one person whose reaction mattered the most.

"I don't want to talk about my job, Rory!" he said sharply. "I don't want to pretend like there's nothing wrong. You might be able to act like everything's fine, but I don't want to do that."

"You think it's that easy for me?" she whispered. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to be here?" She was going to start crying, she knew it. "God, I loved you so much, Logan! All I needed was some time. I needed some time so explore my options and work on being a reporter. I gave you time, why couldn't you give that to me? I kept my mouth shut even though I missed you like crazy when you moved to London, because that's what you needed! I let you figure out what _you_ wanted to do when you left your dad's company, and I didn't interfere. And you told me that I'd have that choice! Remember? We were in Stars Hollow, at the hay bale maze, and you told me to make my decision and not think about how you'd fit in, that you'd work something out. So that's what I did, Logan! You changed the rules and made me chose between you and my career. I had to put my career first, don't you get that? But I guess it doesn't matter now, does it? Rory doesn't get what she wants. I don't _get_ to be a reporter! I'm never going to be an overseas correspondent. The only thing I've ever wanted my entire life, and now I'll never get it."

Logan was lost. He had followed her train of thought completely through the entire rant, until she started going on about not getting to be a reporter. Her thinking made perfect sense, Logan _had_ told her not to factor him in. When Logan had gotten the idea to propose, he hadn't even thought about the fact that she might need more time; he had assumed they were on the same page. But that didn't take away the hurt of her rejection. She could have still been a reporter married to him in Palo Alto. In any case, Rory _had_ a job, she told him so! So he didn't understand what she meant.

"What are you talking about? You _are_ a reporter. You got exactly what you wanted." Logan pointed at her forcefully, emphasizing his point.

Rory laughed, although tears were still running slowly down her cheeks. "No. I don't. The universe had other plans. It let me work my butt off at Chilton and at Yale. I dropped out of school and I went back. I had people tell me I wasn't good enough and I did it anyway. I was editor of the Yale Daily News. I did everything I was supposed to do just so I could be a reporter. And now that I've _finally_ got that, the universe is taking it all away from me!" Rory wiped angrily at her eyes, trying to clear them.

Logan shook his head, confused. "But you _have_ a job, Rory! You're living the life you wanted. So what the hell are you – "

"God, don't you get it yet? I'm pregnant, Logan!"

Logan's mouth snapped shut, and silence filled the room. "How?" was all he managed to say.

Rory scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Well, when a man and a woman get sexually aroused, they – "

"I know how a baby is made, Rory!" he yelled, running a hand through his hair. "I mean how are you – you're on the pill! We used protection!"

"Well, tell that to the fetus growing inside my uterus," Rory replied flatly.

_This can't be happening_, Logan thought. "But we were – I don't…we did everything to prevent this."

"And that's a _real_ comfort to me, and the 1% of people birth control doesn't work for." Rory was passed the point of remaining calm and rational, and was instead defaulting back onto sarcasm.

Logan was at a loss. "Are you _sure_?"

"I haven't exactly been to the doctor yet, but…" Rory reached into her purse and pulled out a plastic Ziploc bag containing the five positive pregnancy tests she had taken, passing them to Logan, knowing that he would need proof. "The information's pretty conclusive."

Logan closed his eyes and shook his head, as though trying to convince himself that he wasn't having this conversation. "I..."

"You're taking this better than I did," Rory said flatly. "When I thought I might be pregnant I had a panic attack. Then when I found out I was I threw up, had a few more panic attacks, cried, slept, and had horrible nightmares. I think I would have preferred becoming speechless."

Logan shrugged. "I don't know what to say."

"That makes two of us." Rory sighed, leaning her head back into the couch. A sense of calm had come over her. The worst was over now; Logan knew that she was pregnant. Now she could begin to move forward. "Look. I heard you loud and clear before. We both made our choices, and now we have to live with them. I'm not here because I want anything from you."

"Then why are you?"

Rory frowned. Did he really have to ask that? "You're going to be a father, Logan," Rory said softly. "You have a right to know that. You deserve to decide for yourself what that means to you. I'm not going to force you to do anything."

That statement woke Logan up a bit. What did she want from him? "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that…that I don't know what I'm supposed to do now." Rory looked down at her hands twisting in her lap, unable to look straight at Logan any longer. "I thought that talking to you would help me figure out where I'm supposed to go from here, but it didn't." Rory shook her head.

So it had nothing to do with him, Logan thought. She didn't come because she wanted them to make a decision together. She was there just to dump this news on him and leave again.

"So that's it? You just came to say, 'hey, Logan, you're gonna be a daddy! See you later!'"

She looked back up, pain showing in her face. "Logan – "

"I mean, why are you even _here_, Rory? Were you just going to tell me and take off, do this whole thing by yourself? Were you not going to let me be involved?"

"Of course I was! But after everything you said…I didn't think I had a right to ask you for anything."

"So what, you want money?"

"You know that I don't, Logan!" Rory snapped. She was beginning to get angry again.

"Then please enlighten me as to what the hell you want!"

"Logan, please – "

"Don't do that, Rory!"

"I'm not going to tell you what the right thing to do here is! I was hoping that you'd want to know your own child, but I'm not going to tell you how to do that! You need to do that on your own."

"So then what happens if my decision isn't to your liking, huh?"

She felt like he was baiting her. "I don't know."

"You know what, Rory? Go ahead and do what you want, it's what you're good at. Leave me out of it!"

His words sent an icy chill down her spine. "That's it? You're not going to…you don't want to be there?"

"I don't know, Rory! You dump this on me and expect a decision right now – "

"That's not what I – "

"But we both know that when it comes down to it, you're gonna do what _you_ want to do."

Rory sensed that this wasn't about being pregnant anymore. Now, Logan was talking about the way in which she'd turned down his proposal. In Rory's mind, the two things weren't connected. She would have turned him down even if she knew she was pregnant when he proposed. But for some reason, Logan felt like he didn't have any control over either situation. He seemed to think that Rory wouldn't be considering him when making decisions.

"What do you want me to say, Logan? Do you want me to tell you exactly what I think you should do? We broke up! We didn't have to, but we did. I'm giving you a choice here. You can either choose to be involved, or you can walk away right now, and never look back."

"And what do _you_ want, Rory?" Logan snapped.

"I don't want any of this!" Rory finally yelled, jumping to her feet. "Do you think that I _wanted_ us to break up, only to find out weeks later that I was pregnant and going to have to raise a child without you? No! Of course not! What _I_ wanted was to go off and work on my reporting career. I wanted to be an overseas correspondent, see if I had it in me. And then maybe in a couple of years when I had time to travel the world without worrying about when I'd come home again, we could settle down and get married and yeah, maybe have a kid. But I'm not going to get any of that, am I? You said all or nothing; I guess I'm _really _getting nothing! So now I'm here, and you're mad at me because I'm not telling you exactly what I think you should do, because I can't say that I secretly hoped everything would magically be fixed and we'd somehow find a way to do this side by side, even though we both want different things right now." She was crying again, but this time, Rory didn't care. She wasn't even sure that she was making sense anymore, but she couldn't seem to stop herself from saying it anyway.

"Rory – "

"But that's not how the world works, Logan!" she continued. "So here's the reality of the situation: I'm pregnant, and we're no longer in a relationship. So I need to know what _you_ plan on doing."

"What are you saying, that I need to decide right now exactly how I'm going to precede?"

"Yes, and you know why? Because when it comes to your child, it _has_ to be all or nothing! You know something about that, don't you?"

Her anger had escalated quickly, and Logan realized that he'd overstepped his bounds.

"You're not being fair, Rory."

"Oh, really? So you're allowed to say all or nothing, but I'm not? You know what, Logan? There's no compromising on this! You and I both know what it's like to grow up with a disappointing father that's never there. I thought that for you of all people, this would be an easy decision. You either want to figure out how to be there or you don't, it can't be somewhere in the middle."

"Rory, come on."

But she was so worked up that she couldn't even listen to whatever he was about to say. "Don't even bother, Logan! You've made it clear to me that you're not going to be able to be there the way I want you to be. And I'm sorry, but I can't have that. I won't have you doing to _my_ child what my own father did to me." She put a special emphasis on the word 'my,' as though making it clear that he would have no part in it. "I'm not going to let you just come around when it's convenient for you, only to never hear from you the rest of the time. So if you can't tell me right now that you'll at least come up with some sort of a plan, then that's it."

"Rory, you're not even giving me a chance."

"I gave you _every_ chance! I've always given you nothing but chances! I can't waiver on this one, Logan!" Rory looked him straight in the eyes. "You know, I don't know what I was thinking. I thought that you'd be different from my father. I thought you'd want to be different from your _own_ father. I thought…god, I thought for sure that you'd beg me to marry you, and I'd have to say no again, and then you'd promise that even if we're not together, you'll figure something out. I let myself believe that you'd be different, that you'd find some way to just _be_ there for me like my father wasn't there for my mother when she needed someone. But you can't even promise me that you'll set something up so you can know your own child. What the hell was I _thinking_?" Rory paced back and forth in front of Logan, who just sat there, silenced by her attack. "You know what? _Fine_. I thought I needed you to make those promises to me, but I don't. I can do this all on my own. My mother did it when she was much younger than me, and damnit, so can I!"

"Rory, stop." Logan hated the way her accusations stung him. He couldn't believe the way he had reacted. He had let his anger at her get the better of him, and he was completely in the wrong.

She was right about everything. He should have given her time. He'd told her one thing, only to go back on his word when he proposed. He thought he'd done everything right. He'd made plans, done research. But in the end, Logan had completely overlooked the fact that she needed time.

And what had he done in return? He'd let his own pride get in the way. How did he screw up so badly? How did he let this turn into an argument? He wasn't thinking clearly right now. He just needed her to stop talking so he could think.

But Rory was shaking her head, already set in her decision. She bent down and gathered her purse from where she had placed it on the floor. She then looked at him as she straightened up. "I'm sorry, Logan. I just – I can't…"

Rory left the sentence hanging as she ran for the door, tears falling fast down her cheeks. She left behind the five pregnancy tests, mocking Logan. They sat there as a reminded to Logan that he was going to be a father, and how much he'd screwed up when she tried to tell him.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I hope you guys enjoyed this update. And don't worry, their conversation is far from over. Logan's not going to give up that easily! In fact, he's already yelling at me in my head, but alas. College calls.


	5. What Comes Next

**A/N: **Wow. Let me just say that the overwhelming response I get for this story makes me put all my other stories on hold so I can get an update for this one finished. I've been getting roughly 20 reviews with each chapter, without fail. It's amazing, but my other stories are starting to feel a bit neglected. In any case, I've managed to power through yet another chapter update on this one, so I hope you all enjoy it!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Five – What Comes Next<span>

As Rory stumbled out of Logan's house, she felt her stomach churn. She wasn't sure if it was due to the pregnancy, or if it was a direct result of her argument with Logan. Either way, as Rory slammed the door behind her, trying to shut their conversation out of her mind, she found that she couldn't move past the porch steps; she was going to be sick. Rory collapsed on the hard cement of the top step, placing her head between her knees, trying to get her breathing under control.

Her mind was racing. She hadn't expected Logan to be so angry with her. She didn't think…well, Rory wasn't sure what she'd thought was going to happen. In all honesty, Rory was so sure that Logan would do the right thing. She'd _wanted_ him to. But Rory couldn't tell him what to do any more than she could force him to do what she thought was right. It wasn't her place anymore. It never had been, really.

She hadn't planned on cutting Logan off completely for not being able to give her some sort of promise to be involved, but he'd gotten her so worked up. And once she'd come to the decision that he either needed to me a constant presence of no presence, Rory realized that she couldn't back down. She hated the idea that Logan could turn into her father, coming around only when it was convenient for him, leaving her child wondering why he or she wasn't enough to make him stay, or at least call. But what scared Rory the most was the idea that, if Logan turned into her father, then Rory would turn into her mother. She didn't want to be forever waiting for things to work out between them just because a child was now involved. She hated to think that she'd never be able to have a happy relationship again because she'd always be hoping that the next time he came around, he'd never want to leave. And with Logan, something would always be there, just like something was always there between Chris and Lorelai. Even when they'd both moved on, even when they were in happy relationships with other people, something was always there. She didn't know if that would be the case for Logan, but Rory knew herself well enough to know that, now that she was permanently linked to Logan for good, she'd never truly be able to get him out of her heart. Not in the way she wanted to.

It wasn't going to work out between them, Rory was sure of that now. They'd both hurt each other too much to fix things, especially now. Now, Rory needed to be strong. If she was really going to do this, raise a child all on her own, then she had to be strong. She had to put Logan behind her and move on with her life, for real this time. Even if it hurt. Even if she'd always care for him.

But first, Rory needed her stomach to stop heaving so she could get up off his porch.

* * *

><p>Logan remained frozen on the couch as the sound of Rory slamming the door echoed throughout the house. Her accusations cut into him, and she had every right to say those things. He should have given her more time. He shouldn't have picked a fight with her when she told him she was pregnant. He should have been able to promise her that he'd be there. But Logan's pride and anger had gotten the better of him.<p>

He'd made such a mess of everything.

One thought kept running through his mind as he tried to figure out what to do next: Honor must have known. It was the only reason he could think of that she'd give Rory his address. Honor knew better than anyone how stubborn Logan can be. Rory must have told her, it's the only way Honor would have agreed to help.

Without thinking, Logan fumbled for his phone and dialed his sister's number.

"You knew," he said by way of greeting.

"Hello to you too, little brother," Honor said. "What did I know?"

"Don't play games with me, Honor; I'm not in the mood for it." Logan's energy was draining away fast. "Rory was just here. You knew that she's pregnant."

Honor sighed. "Yeah, she told me. She made me promise not to tell you, she wanted you to hear it from her. She thought that if she couldn't get you to listen, then at least someone in our family would know."

He didn't blame Honor for not telling him; her sense of loyalty ran deep. He understood why Honor would respect Rory's wishes in favor of her own brother. It was a reminder of his own stubbornness. He wouldn't listen, and he'd made the whole situation worse.

"Damnit!" Logan yelled, grabbing the remote from the couch and throwing it across the room. It hit the wall with a resounding crash, the batteries flying out of the back.

"I take it things didn't go very well."

"Not exactly," said Logan. "I yelled. Then she yelled. Then she walked out."

"How in the world did you manage to start an _argument_, Logan? For god's sake, the girl is _pregnant_! Her hormones are going crazy as it is, never mind the fact that she has no idea what to do. She's terrified, she's feeling guilty that she had to choose her career over her relationship, and to top it all off, she's somehow managed to convince herself that now she can't be a journalist. And how do you react? You both yelled at each other!"

Logan frowned. Was Honor psychic? "How do you know all this?"

"Well, she had a bit of a meltdown when she told me she's pregnant. It all kind of came pouring out. She didn't mean to tell me any of it."

"Shit," he murmured.

"She's also convinced that you'll hate her forever and that you'll never know your child, and that scares her."

Logan was beginning to realize exactly how big the mess he made was. "I screwed everything up, Honor. I froze and I couldn't tell her what she needed to hear, so she more or less told me to stay away from her."

"And you're going to let that stop you?"

"Well not really, but – "

"Damnit, Logan. You still love her, right?"

"Honor – "

"Oh, don't even try to deny it to me; you and I both know that it's true. Even if it's not, you're going to be a father, Logan. For the rest of your life, you will be a father and Rory will be the mother. And I swear to god, Logan, if you do not figure out some way to be in that kid's life, then I will never forgive you. I am _not_ letting you become the detached father that Mitchum Huntzberger is. So you had better figure out a way to clean up this mess before it's too late."

He hated how right Honor was. "Do you know where she's staying tonight?"

Honor laughed. "Now that's more like it."

* * *

><p>Logan had no idea how he was going to begin to fix this. But now his anger had subsided, and his mind had gotten used to the knowledge that Rory was pregnant. So Logan gathered his keys from where he'd left them in the kitchen, and went to go after Rory.<p>

He didn't have far to go. Logan opened his front door to find Rory crouched down on the top step, leaning over the side as she threw up into the bushes.

His heart clenched as he watched her. She had removed her heels and tossed them down the steps onto the walkway. She was sitting on her suit jacket, and was using one of her hands to hold her hair back. Closing the door softly behind him, Logan sat down next to Rory and took hold of her hair for her. He stroked her head gently as she finished emptying her stomach into his bushes.

"Sorry," she mumbled as she shifted her position to face him. "Apparently morning sickness is a misnomer, because I've been throwing up at all hours all week."

"It's fine," Logan told her. "You're pregnant."

It was the first time Rory heard Logan say it out loud, and suddenly, the situation became so much more real. Not the fact that she was pregnant, she'd come to terms with that by now. But Rory was suddenly struck with the very real fact that she and Logan were going to be parents. And that was enough to start her crying all over again.

Logan wrapped an arm around Rory's shoulder. She turned into his chest and sobbed even harder, unable to stop crying. Her entire body was shaking, and Logan hugged her closer.

"It's okay," he whispered soothingly into her ear as he resumed stroking her hair. "It's okay."

It occurred to Logan that his sister was right; he did still love her. Some part of him would always love her. How could he not? She was going to be the mother of his child. But that might not be enough anymore. They'd both screwed things up, hurting each other deeply. And now they needed to put that all aside not so they could figure themselves out, but to figure out how to be parents, because their relationship didn't matter anymore.

That is, if Rory would forgive him so he _could_ be one.

"I'm sorry," Logan said when Rory calmed down. She pulled back, and Logan let his arms drop away. "I shouldn't have yelled at you."

"You were mad," She said with a shrug. "I didn't want to – I understand why you didn't want to talk to me."

"Yeah, but even after you told me…I shouldn't have started that argument. I was upset and I let it get the better of me. It was wrong."

"You don't need to apologize, Logan. I understand why you were mad." Rory sighed. "I don't think I ever explained – it hurt _so much_ to say no to you. It hurt us both, and I hated doing it. I just felt like I had no choice. And it _sucked_, Logan, because I didn't want us to be over, and then suddenly we were. And every time something happened, I kept reaching for my phone to call you, and then I'd remember what I did and it hurt all over again. Even when I thought that I might be pregnant, it hurt so much that I couldn't even think your name. It hurts, Logan, and I don't want it to hurt anymore."

Logan wanted to refute her, to let her know that he shouldn't have made her make that choice in the first place, but he could tell from the look on her face that she needed to get this all out. So he let her continue.

"I met Christiane Amanpour, you know."

He raised his eyebrows, smiling slightly. "Really?"

"A couple of days after graduation. She was staying at the Dragonfly. So Mom came rushing home and wakes me up, telling me that Christiane Amanpour is sitting in the lobby, but I don't believe her so she drags me there in my pajamas."

"You met Christiane Amanpour in your pajamas?" Logan laughed. "At least you made an impression."

"Don't start," Rory said with a roll of her eyes, nudging him with her knee. He gave her a weak smile, and the moment they were sharing passed. "I hate this."

Logan snaked his arm back around her, and Rory leaned her head against his shoulder. "This isn't exactly how I wanted things to go either."

"I meant what I said, you know," Rory continued. "I need some kind of constant. My mom and I, we never knew when my dad would come around, or even call next. I can't have that again, Logan. Not from you. I'll do it on my own if I have to, but I want you to be there. I just need you to give me something."

Logan sighed. "I don't even know where to begin in making that kind of promise. I'm out here in California and you're…I assume you're going to move back home."

In all honesty, Rory hadn't thought about that. "I guess so."

Logan knew that if he was going to fix things, it needed to be on her terms. "You should move back home. If you wouldn't move out here to marry me, I don't want you uprooting your whole life to make sure the baby is close to me. You do what you want, and I'll figure something out."

"You've made that promise to me before, Logan."

"I know I have, and I plan on following through with it this time."

Rory pulled away, looking him directly in the face. "I'm not sure if I believe you."

He didn't blame her; she had no reason to trust his word on the matter. He took her face between his hands, stroking her cheek gently. "Rory, I promise you that I will do everything I can to make sure that I know our child."

Despite the intimate gesture, it occurred to Rory that things still weren't okay between them. He hadn't promised to be there for her, and really, she hadn't expected him to. It wasn't about her anymore. But deep down, she'd hoped he would do it anyway. She didn't need his support. If her mother was any indication, Rory knew that she could do it all on her own. But she'd been hoping that he'd give it to her.

She realized that the entire time, he'd been calling her Rory. Not Ace. Logan almost never referred to her by her name. It was a reminder that she was no longer _his_ Ace. She had gone back to being just Rory, and that's who she'd always be. Rory Gilmore, the mother of his child.

And with that realization came the knowledge that she just didn't trust him anymore. His words and promises were empty. She really was on her own. Which was fine; it put her fully in charge.

"I'm going to need you to prove that to me, Logan. Because until you do, I can't let you be involved. It's too much."

Rory stood up, brushing the dirt off the seat of her pants. She gathered up her jacket in her arms, and walked the rest of the way down the steps to pick up her heels.

"I should go. I'm tired, and I have an article to write."

Logan panicked. He didn't want them to leave on bad terms, not again. "Let me take you to dinner."

But Rory shook her head. She didn't think she could make it through an entire meal with him. She might start crying over her dinner, or accidentally confess her love for him. "I can't. I need…I need some time to clear my head. I'm sorry."

Logan nodded in understanding. "Well then at least let me drive you to your hotel."

Rory hesitated, but she couldn't think of any reason to say no. "Okay," she answered softly, and Logan led Rory to his car sitting in the driveway.

They remained quiet as Logan drove Rory back to her hotel. There were so many things he wanted to say. He wished he could reassure her that he'd be there for her, no matter what he had to do. He wanted to tell her how much he'd missed her, even when he was mad at her. He wanted to let her know that it was going to be okay. He wanted to reassure her that she'd still get to be an overseas correspondent, just like she always wanted. But Logan recognized the fact that Rory had lost comfort in his words. Now she needed action. He had to prove to her that he could be the kind of father she needed him to be. The trouble was, Logan didn't know where to start.

"Thanks," she mumbled as he pulled up in front of the substandard hotel she was staying in. She slipped her shoes back onto her feet and reached for the door handle.

"You'll call?" he asked quickly.

Rory took a deep breath before twisting around to face him again. Of course, Rory wanted to promise that she would. But she needed to remain firm. "No, Logan. I won't. I told you what I need. You need to figure things out for yourself."

He understood, even though it would kill him not knowing how she was doing or how the baby was doing until he figured it out. "Are we okay?"

Rory smiled weakly; it didn't quite reach her eyes. "We'll be fine." And as she stepped out of the car and closed the door behind her, Logan hoped it wasn't for good. He needed to find a way to fix this, and he needed to do it now.

* * *

><p>Logan didn't go home after dropping Rory off. Instead, he drove around aimlessly, trying to figure out what to do. But Logan didn't know where to start. He needed guidance; he needed someone to talk to.<p>

Colin and Finn were no good. And Honor wasn't about to tell him how to fix his problems. His parents…well, they'd probably kill him when they found out. Especially when they discovered that they weren't going to get married. Logan had no one to turn to, and he didn't know where to start figuring this out on his own.

Then it occurred to him; Tracy, his secretary. She was the only person he knew in a normal relationship, with kids, who might actually be able to give him some perspective.

"Please don't tell me that something's wrong at the office," Tracy said when she answered her phone.

"Are you busy now?"

"I'm at the playground with my boys. Why? Can it wait until Monday?"

"My ex girlfriend's pregnant."

Tracy didn't respond for a while. "Come to the park, it's the one right by my house."

"Thanks." Logan hung up the phone and took the next exit on the highway, heading in the direction of Tracy's house.

* * *

><p>Rory didn't have any energy left in her anymore. All she wanted was to sleep the rest of the day away. But Rory had things to do. She had an article to write. She needed to make plans for getting back home. She had to call her mother. Rory decided that was the best task to tackle first.<p>

Claire was in their room, already hard at work on her article. Rory nodded at her by way of greeting, changed into a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt in the bathroom, and then took her cell phone out into the hallway to give her mom a call.

"Hey, how'd it go?" Lorelai asked.

"Not well," Rory responded. She sat down on the floor next to the elevators, pulling her knees into her chest. "We sort of got into an argument, and I stormed out."

"Oh, hun – "

"And then, because it wasn't humiliating enough to have to go to my ex boyfriend and tell him I'm pregnant with his baby, or to basically pour my guts out to him with every worry I've been having, I started to feel sick when I got outside and he found me throwing up over the side of his porch."

"Ah, morning sickness," said Lorelai, almost as though she were reminiscing. "One of the many marvelous benefits of pregnancy."

"They should really rename it to all day sickness."

"Nah, doesn't have the same ring to it." Lorelai paused. "Are you okay, hun?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It got better from there. We talked, he apologized. He just…I needed him to promise me that he wouldn't just flit in and out of my life the way dad used to. I wanted a plan, a schedule. And he didn't give it to me."

"Rory, you've got to give him some time to come up with one."

"But he couldn't even promise that he _would_, Mom. That's the whole point." Rory stopped talking as two reporters from the bus exited the elevator. She waited for them to walk down the hall and into their room before she continued. "He told me to do what I want and he'd figure out something, but I'm not sure if I believe him. He told me the exact same thing when I was trying to figure out my next career move, but then when I chose not to move to California and marry him so that I _could_ do that, he walked away."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I haven't decided exactly yet, but I think I'll move back home, get a job at a local paper. Is that okay? I'll get an apartment as soon as I can, but Mom, if I'm going to do this all on my own, I need – "

"Whoa, Rory slow down! You're preaching to the choir here. Of course that's okay, hun. I think you've got a good plan; Stars Hollow can be a great support system. You're walking proof."

Rory groaned. "God, what is the town gonna think?"

"Who cares? I'll have Luke beat up anyone who says anything bad about you."

"If he doesn't kill Logan first! Oh god, how am I going to tell Dad?"

"Look, I'll take care of Luke and Dad. But I think you need to tell Grandma and Grandpa yourself."

That thought terrified Rory, more so than telling Logan did. "They're going to hate me."

"You, their perfect angel of a granddaughter? Never. They'll blame me, but they can never hate you."

Rory took a couple of shallow breaths. "Why are you being so calm about this?"

"Because first of all, kid, you're in a much better position than I was when I was pregnant with you. You're smart, you have a college degree, you're an adult, and you're already formulating a plan. Second, I know you don't trust that Logan will get his act together and figure something out, and I understand why you don't. But I watched him get his act together; pretty recently, in fact. He was very determined to make sure that I knew he could get his act together. So despite my better judgment, I think he's going to surprise you. You are _both _more than capable of figuring out how to make the whole 'parenting' thing work. But most importantly…I know how much you need someone to be calm and supportive of you right now. I'm not going to put you through what my parents put me through. Okay?"

Lorelai's words of comfort made her feel a bit better. "I'm going to let Hugo know that I'm quitting when I email him my article tonight. Hopefully I can get home soon."

"Call me when you know when that will be."

Rory smiled. "Thanks, Mom."

* * *

><p>It seemed like such an odd place for Logan to be, considering his current situation. Walking towards a playground where children were laughing and playing happily did nothing to alleviate his stress. In fact, it only added to his fears. Logan hadn't really had time to fully process what Rory being pregnant truly meant. There was the full scope of the situation right in front of him, running around on the playground without a care in the world. The thought of being responsible for a child terrified him. He had only just figured out how to take care of himself, how was he supposed to be responsible for another human life? But what could be worse than that would be if Rory never let him anywhere near their child.<p>

He had to find some way to fix this. He had to make it up to her.

Logan sat down on the bench next to Tracy without saying hello. She turned sideways to face him, giving him a comforting smile.

"Okay, start from the beginning. Explain to me what happened."

But that was easier said than done. "She…she just showed up on my doorstep this afternoon, wanting to talk."

Tracy frowned. "She showed up, out of the blue?"

"Not exactly. She tried calling me first, but I hung up on her. She called my friends, my sister. My sister gave her my address; she's in town for work now."

"Okay, so she just shows up and tells you she's pregnant?"

"It didn't go like that, exactly. We both have a lot of…unresolved issues, I guess is the right way to explain it." Logan took a deep breath. "You know, I proposed to her last month?"

Tracy shook her head. "I didn't know that."

The memory stung a little. "Right before I moved out here. I wanted her to come with me."

"And she didn't want that?"

"No, there's more to it than that. She had just graduated from college, and she wasn't ready to make this big life decision that would tie her to one place when she'd only just gotten the chance to go out into the world. She's a reporter; she wants to travel."

Tracy nodded.

"I'm the one that screwed it up. She wanted time, but I thought…you know, I had this crazy idea in my head that if I couldn't get her to say yes now, she'd never do it. So I walked away, moved out here. I spent a lot of time being angry at her for choosing her career over our relationship."

"Oh, Logan," Tracy said sympathetically.

"Trust me, you don't have to tell me how much of an idiot I am." Logan ran his hands over his face and through his hair. "If I had just given her time like she wanted, we wouldn't be in this situation now."

Tracy laughed humorlessly. "You do realize that she'd be pregnant regardless, right?"

"Yeah, but if we hadn't broken up, we wouldn't have fought. And now she's pretty mad at me." Logan took a moment to try and explain the complicated situation he was now in. "It's more than just being pregnant. Neither one of us grew up with the best father figures." Logan had already told Tracy enough about his home life to understand what Logan was talking about. It had been the first thing to come out about Logan when he started at the company. It didn't take long for everyone to realize that Logan was connected to the Huntzberger's of Huntzberger Publishing Group. Soon the story became public knowledge, but Tracy (along with Logan's partners in the company) was one of the few who knew the full extent of Logan's relationship with his parents.

"You know what my parents are like, but Rory…her mother had her when she was sixteen."

"Oh, wow."

"And Rory's mom stayed at home for a while, but it wasn't working. Her values were different from her parent's values, so one night she just took off, and took Rory with her. Got a job as a maid working for room and board. She worked her way up and saved as much as she could, creating an entire life for them starting from nothing." Logan smiled. "I really admire her, actually."

"What about the father?"

"Rory's dad…he was never really around. He wanted to do the right thing and get married at first, but Rory's mom wouldn't do it. So he took off and did his own thing. He rarely came around, barely even called. And that's part of the problem. She's afraid that'll happen again, and that's not a risk she's willing to take. And I don't blame her, really. My mind went blank when she told me she's pregnant, and I couldn't tell her anything. So she's cutting me off until I can tell her how I plan to be a father."

They sat in silence for a while, watching Tracy's two sons chase each other around the jungle gym.

"She hates me," he muttered.

"Logan, she doesn't hate you. She's what, 22 years old and about to become a single mother? If that happened to me, I'd be scared out of my freaking mind! She's probably a little hormonal, but she doesn't hate you."

"Well, she's really mad, anyway. I've gotta find some way to fix this."

This is the part where he needed some perspective. He was incapable of looking at the situation rationally anymore.

"You're looking at this all wrong. You shouldn't be thinking about how to fix it, you _should_ be thinking about what you want. What is it you want, Logan? Don't think, just say the first thing that comes to your mind."

"What I want is to marry her."

"Okay, well that's not really an option right now. Take your relationship out of the equation. What do you want?"

He sighed. "I want to be there when the kid grows up. My dad wasn't there, and I don't want that to be me. But see, that's the problem. I'm in California now, and she's going to move back home. In fact, I _told_ her she should move back home."

"Well, then you've got a choice to make. Either you settle for only seeing your child maybe once a month if you're lucky, or you've got to move back home too."

That was the solution he was afraid of. "I can't move back to Connecticut, my job's out here."

Tracy laughed. "So what?"

He stared at her incredulously. "So what? I'm a full partner! I can't just walk away."

"Sure you can. You're going to be a parent now, Logan. You're not the priority anymore. The thing you've got to understand is that, when it comes to your kid you do whatever you have to do. So if that's what you _really_ want, then it's not even a question. So you pack your things, you find a new job, and you go live wherever she's going to live."

That would mean living in Stars Hollow, or at least close to it. Logan wasn't sure if Rory would be comfortable with him living in her town unless they were together.

But that was getting ahead of things.

"I just want her to be happy. And she's not. I don't know if I know how to make her happy anymore."

"Yes you do, Logan. You know _exactly_ what you need to do to make her happy."

Logan thought back on the conversations they'd had. The thing she was afraid of most of all was Logan turning into her dad. Lorelai had done everything by herself, right from the very beginning. So it wasn't just about raising a child with no father that scared Rory, it was having no one else there. And Rory needed Logan to be there. Not just for emotional support, or so she had someone else to share the experience of watching a child grow up with. No, Rory needed someone else there so that, when the time came for her to travel the world as a journalist like she's always wanted, she could do it. Rory needed the help of another parent to make sure that she wouldn't put her dreams on hold for eighteen years, like Rory's own mother had to.

Tracy was right. Logan knew exactly what he had to do next.


	6. Something About Chromosomes

**A/N: **I thank you all for your patience. Sometimes it's hard to find time to balance writing with my course work. Especially when I have 3 stories in progress.

This chapter we get a bit of a break from Rory, and focus a bit more on Logan and Lorelai. I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Six – Something About Chromosomes<span>

Tracy insisted that Logan come over to have dinner at her house that night. "You're going to be a father soon," she said. "It's about time for you to have some practice."

Truth be told, Logan didn't know the first thing about kids. As far as parenting went, he only knew that he wanted to do almost everything completely the opposite of the way his father did. His child wouldn't be forced into a career it didn't want. Logan would celebrate his child's birthday with ice cream cake and maybe a clown instead of the fancy, over the top parties Logan had that weren't even about him. Logan would show up at sports events or science fairs or the school play or concert. He would help with homework.

Logan tried not to think about what he really wanted: to be able to be there every night for dinner. In order for that to work out, he had to be with Rory. He had no idea if that would ever happen again, no matter how much he may want it.

The other stuff, however, was a complete mystery to him.

"I have something for you," said Tracy when they arrived back at her house. "Go watch TV, kids."

While her sons, Alex and Nathan, ran into the living room and switched their television on, Logan followed Tracy into the downstairs office. Along one of the walls was a line of overflowing bookshelves, every last inch crammed with a different book. Tracy scanned the shelf carefully before selecting the book she was looking for, pulling it from where it was wedged on the second highest shelf.

"_What to Expect When You're Expecting_," Logan said aloud as he read the title.

"I've pretty much got it covered by now, so even if Joe and I decide to have another kid, I won't be needing that. Your cause is greater than mine."

Logan smiled weakly. "Rory's probably going to buy every pregnancy book she can get her hands on the minute she gets home."

"Sounds like she'll be prepared," Tracy commented, taking a seat in the large desk chair and swiveling it around to face him. Logan followed suite, sitting down on the couch across from her.

"She likes her research." Logan's smile grew as he remembered back to when they had just met and were dancing around each other. Rory had decided to lend him some of her notes to help him write an article. However, when he showed up at the Pub to meet with her, 'some' of her notes turned out to be three giant stacks of folders filled with research. She'd been cute and nervous, and Logan had almost given up all resolve and asked her out right then. But in the end he'd back down, convincing himself that they were too different, and it would never work out. Funny how, a few years later, he wanted to be not just the boyfriend guy, but the husband guy. Now he was going to be the father guy.

"It's always good to be thorough, especially when it comes to your first pregnancy. You panic over every little thing."

"Thorough is one way to describe her. A little over a year ago we were planning this six week trip to Asia. She bought all these travel books, covered them with highlighters and post-it notes. She got so excited about it." He smiled sadly. "We never did get to take that trip."

"Why not?"

Logan shrugged. "My dad decided that I needed to go to London for a year. I left the day after graduation." Logan sighed as he thought about how hard it had been leaving her. "God, I can't believe that was a year ago. So much has happened. If someone had told me back then that in a year's time I would have proposed only for us to break up and then find out that Rory's pregnant, I probably would have thought it was all some elaborate joke."

"Which part?"

"All of it. I was nowhere near ready to settle down back then. Everything was so uncertain. But then, I dunno, everything kind of fell into place. Things were good, _really_ good. And then…" He let his sentence trail off. And then he proposed, gave her an ultimatum when she said no, walked away, hated her, found out she was pregnant, picked an argument with her, and ruined everything.

"It sounds like you care about her a lot."

He noticed Tracy's use of the present tense rather than the past. He smiled.

"I really do."

* * *

><p>Lorelai sat staring at her phone, willing herself to pick it up and dial. She wasn't exactly looking forward to calling the father of her kid and telling him that their child was about to repeat history.<p>

This was never what Lorelai wanted for her baby. Rory was supposed to have everything that Lorelai didn't. She'd made sure that Rory could have it all. And right at the moment Rory was about to go out into the world and be exactly what she'd worked so hard to become, everything came to a screeching halt. Lorelai still believed in Rory. But she hated to think that her daughter would have to put her dreams on hold, even temporarily.

It was hard not to be mad at Logan. She wanted to throttle that boy. Breaking her baby's heart and knocking her up in the process was just unacceptable to Lorelai. But underneath her anger, Lorelai knew that Logan hadn't meant to do any of that. He really did care for her daughter, despite having screwed things up. Logan had made a point to prove to Lorelai how much he cared for Rory; that wasn't the sort of thing you do lightly. It stuck with her. Lorelai wanted to trust that, in the end, Logan would do the right thing. But her prior experience with getting pregnant out of wedlock made that hard to do.

In any case, being mad at Logan for making the same mistake that Lorelai made when she was sixteen was pointless. She knew that Rory would have done everything in her power to prevent this from happening in the first place. Besides, that one mistake had turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to Lorelai. She could only hope that Rory would have the same outcome.

So Lorelai made the decision to put away the 'angry mom' hat and put on the 'supportive parent' one instead. And that, unfortunately, meant making an unpleasant phone call to Christopher.

Paul Anka jumped on the couch next to her, resting his head in Lorelai's lap. She took that as a sign of encouragement, and with a deep breath, she grabbed the phone and dialed Christopher's number before she could change her mind.

"Hello?"

_Here goes nothing_, Lorelai thought.

"Hey, Chris."

"Lor? Wow, this is a surprise. A good one; I'm glad you called."

Lorelai stroked Paul Anka's head with her hand, switching the phone to her other ear. "Well. Just remember that feeling."

"What's going on, Lor? Is everything alright?"

"Chris, I have something to tell you, and I need you to promise me that you won't get mad. Anger's not going to make the situation any better."

There was a slight pause. "Okay, you're starting to scare me a little. Should I be worried?"

"Just promise me, Chris. Please?"

"Okay, I promise. What's this all about?"

Lorelai took a deep breath. "Rory's pregnant."

She sat in silence as she waited for a response. "Chris?"

"I'm sorry. It sounded like you just told me our daughter is pregnant."

"I did. I wish I were kidding."

"I…are you sure?"

"Well I didn't pee on the stick myself, but the couple of hysterical phone calls I've gotten over the past couple of days seem to confirm it." Lorelai gave Chris another couple of moments to let this information sink in. "Chris, say something."

"I…can I kill Logan? It is Logan, right?"

This, at least, made Lorelai smile. "Don't worry, our daughter's already punishing him enough. Apparently when she told him, they got into this huge fight and then promptly made up. But as a result, Rory won't let him anywhere near her or the baby until he gives her some kind of plan for being involved."

"So basically, she wants to know if he's going to do the exact opposite of what I did."

Although it was the truth, she didn't want Christopher to still feel guilty about it.

"Chris – "

"No, I get it. I was a crappy dad. I never called or came around. I get why Rory wants to know when Logan will."

"You were sixteen, Chris. We were still kids. Logan's twenty five. He's much better equipped than we were to figure out the whole single parenting thing. You can't judge those two on the same scale as you and I."

"Does it help any that I regret it?"

Lorelai smiled. "A little, yeah. You still want to kill Logan?"

"A little. God, poor Rory. How's she handling all this?"

"Very moody. I think she's going to be a very emotional pregnant woman. She was afraid you'd be disappointed in her, that's why she's not the one calling you. You're not, are you?"

Lorelai heard Chris sigh. "Of course not."

"Good. Look, Chris. Richard and Emily are going to have a field day with this one; they'll be jumping down my throat. And I don't even want to _think_ about how the Huntzberger's are going to react. I really think that the two of us need to provide a united front of support here. We might be the only really support system she has."

"You're probably right."

"So you'll be nice to Logan? Just…try to remember what it was like to be in his shoes."

Lorelai waited in silence for Chris to respond. "Yeah, okay. I won't kill him. I'll let Richard do that."

* * *

><p>It felt strange for Logan to be sitting in the old Pub he used to go to back in his Yale days. Logan sat at his table quietly, waiting for Colin and Finn to arrive, taking in the scene around him. It had been years since he'd been to this place; Logan was pretty sure the last time he was here was before he graduated. As he watched the current set of Eli's in his favorite local bar, it was hard not to think about all of the good times he'd had here. Automatically, his mind drifted to Rory. Even though he knew he had memories at this bar without Rory in them, it was impossible to remember them at that moment.<p>

She rarely left his mind lately. Logan was overridden with guilt about the way he'd treated her when she tried to tell him she was pregnant. He'd only succeeded in driving her further away from him. It was the last thing he wanted. Logan couldn't even remember why he was so mad at her in the first place, really. He could hardly blame her for saying no; he'd given her the option to choose, only to go back on his word. His big, romantic gesture had turned out to be incredibly selfish.

Not that any of that mattered anymore. He might not be able to fix the way he'd pushed her away, but Logan would be damned if he couldn't at least figure out how to be a good father. Rory at least deserved that from him. He'd be the best damn father he could be for that kid.

Logan spotted Colin and Finn walking through the front door just as he was finishing his beer.

"You just couldn't stay away, could you, Huntz?" said Finn upon approaching the table. He grasped Logan's hand and clapped him on the back in greeting.

If only that were the real reason he was back in Connecticut. "You know I can never stay away from you guys for too long," Logan said with a nod to Colin before embracing him like a long lost brother.

"So how's it going, man?" asked Colin when they finally sat down, full drinks in front of them. "What are you really doing out here?"

"You can't have really missed Connecticut that much, mate," Finn added. "Is life on the West Coast really that boring without us?"

"Not exactly." Logan took a large gulp of his beer. He wasn't particularly looking forward to telling his friends his reason for returning home. "Do you remember a couple of weeks ago when Rory was trying to get in contact with me?"

"Please don't tell me you came back just to talk to her," Colin said, his face contorted in mock pain. "Come on, man. The girl's just desperate. You don't owe her anything."

"Well, she was definitely desperate. But she's not in Connecticut right now. She showed up on my doorstep last week."

"Tell me you didn't talk to her, Logan?"

Logan let his silence as he took another gulp of his beer speak for him.

"What the hell is wrong with you, mate?" Finn asked, smacking him upside the head. "How'd she get your address, anyway?"

"Honor gave it to her."

"Are those two collaborating now? Is she really that desperate to get back together with you?"

Logan shook his head. "You are so far off the mark."

"Then what is it, Logan?" Colin asked. "Because I can't figure out why you'd even talk to her after she turned you down."

"It's not that simple." Colin and Finn waited for Logan to continue. Finn rolled his eyes, groaning in frustration, and Colin took a long swig of his beer.

"Rory's pregnant."

Colin coughed, chocking on the beer he must have been unable to finish swallowing. "I'm sorry, what?"

"She's pregnant. With a baby."

"Well, gee. Thanks for clearing that one up," said Colin sarcastically. "And here I thought you were telling me she was pregnant with an alien, like in Men in Black."

"Why are you so mad? You're not the asshole who knocked her up. That was all me."

"Sorry, man. Still processing." Colin took another drink, while Finn just sat there staring at Logan, his mouth hanging opened. "Jesus. She's really pregnant?"

"She even brought me the five positive pregnancy tests she took to prove it."

Colin shook his head, as though finding the whole thing hard to believe.

Logan turned to Finn. "You're quiet."

He shrugged. "Congratulations, Daddy."

Logan gave him a shove. "Please don't call me that."

"Do you even know how to change a diaper?"

"Stop being an ass," Logan warned.

"Sorry, mate." Finn shook his head, covering his mouth with his hand in an attempt to hide his silent laughter.

"Well, I'm glad you think the fact that my ex girlfriend is pregnant is a laughing matter."

"Oh, come on, Logan. You don't see the irony in the situation?"

"Of course I do. I just don't find nearly as much humor in it as you two idiots do."

"Alright!" Colin interjected. All three stopped talking, letting silence settle over the table.

Colin continued after several minutes of quiet. "So Rory's pregnant?"

Logan nodded, finishing the rest of his beer quickly.

"How you holding up?"

He shrugged. "Honestly, I'm kind of all over the place on the emotional scale. I was so mad at Rory when she told me that we got into this huge fight. So now she won't even talk to me. That's why I'm here." Logan let out a huge breath. "I messed everything up, so I decided to move back home to prove that I will be the kind of father that both our fathers never were."

Finn shook his head.

"What?"

"Mate, you don't want to hear what I've got to say."

"No, go ahead, Finn. Please enlighten me with your wisdom."

Finn downed his glass quickly, signaling the waitress for another round. "You're like a sad little puppy dog, running back to Rory with your tail between your legs. She's pregnant, Logan. She's not going to marry you."

Logan shook his head. "It's not that simple."

"Of course it is. What do you thinks' going to happen, Logan? Is she suddenly going to want to get married now that she's having your baby?"

"I don't really care."

"Of course you do," Colin interrupted, shaking his head in disbelief. "You never could think straight when it came to this girl, Logan. You're not looking at things clearly."

"So what the hell was I supposed to do, huh? Stay in California? That's not an option anymore! Rory's pregnant with _my_ child, and unless I do something about it now, I'll never get to see it. She'll make sure of that. And I am _not_ going to let that happen to my kid. If I have to spend the rest of my life in love with that girl and not be able to do anything about it just so my kid doesn't have to grow up without a father, then damnit, that's what I'll do!" He pounded his fist on the table, emphasizing his point.

Colin and Finn studied Logan carefully after his outburst.

"I give it a month before you're back together," Colin said.

"No way," Finn disagreed. "Rory's stubborn. Plus, she's got all those pregnancy hormones. It'll take at least until the baby's born."

"Hundred bucks?"

"Deal."

"You better hope Rory never finds out about this," said Logan as he watched Colin and Finn shake on the bet.

They ignored him. "Another hundred says it's a boy," said Colin.

"Are you kidding? It's going to be a girl. Logan would be so lost with a daughter. After all the disgusting things he's done to women, he'd be the most overbearing father a girl could have."

"Do you even know how the sex of a child comes to be?" Colin asked.

Finn shrugged. "Something to do with chromosomes?"

* * *

><p>As Lorelai made her way to the diner that morning, she knew that she'd put off telling Luke long enough. Rory had finally called her with the date of her return. Soon, the cat would be out of the bag. Luke, at the very least, needed to know. She'd figure out how to break it to the rest of the town later.<p>

It had been difficult keeping this information from him, but it wasn't exactly something she could just come out and say. Luke had always treated Rory like a daughter; he was the overprotective father that she never had. He still saw her as that little girl running around town in a tutu and fairy wings. She was almost more afraid of how Luke would react than how Christopher took the news.

But she didn't see how she could put it off any longer, especially with Rory coming home soon. It hadn't been easy, hiding the secret from him. Lorelai had acted like nothing was wrong while her mind was elsewhere. When Rory called, Lorelai would excuse herself to another room if Luke happened to be with her, claiming that Rory needed some girl talk. Luckily, Luke was generally oblivious to sudden changes in mood, which came in handy for the first time in Lorelai's recent memory. However, she hadn't been able to hide her preoccupation from Sookie, who noticed that something was wrong the day after Rory called her with official news that she was pregnant.

"Something's wrong," Sookie said flatly as Lorelai drank her coffee while leaning on the counter in the Inn's kitchen that morning. "You're quiet this morning."

Lorelai shrugged. "Just tired."

"You? Tired?" Sookie, who had been chopping vegetables, pointed a knife at her accusingly. "You've probably had five cups of coffee already this morning. What gives?"

Lorelai glanced around the rather full kitchen. She couldn't say anything here. Even if they cleared the room, there was the risk of someone walking in unannounced and overhearing. "Can you step away for a minute?"

Sookie put down her knife slowly, a worried look on her face. "Okay, what's wrong?"

"I can't tell you here. Let's go to my office."

With a furrowed brow, Sookie followed her friend out of the kitchen, through the reception area, and into Lorelai's office.

"Talk," Sookie demanded the second she closed the door behind them.

Lorelai couldn't hold it in any longer. "Rory's pregnant!" Lorelai exclaimed in a rush.

Sookie looked like her eyes were going to pop out of her head. "No!"

"Yes."

"Seriously?"

"God, how I wish I was joking."

"Pregnant?"

"That about sums it up." Lorelai distracted herself by taking a large gulp of her coffee.

"How long have you known?"

"She called me in a panic yesterday morning, but I found out for sure last night." She shook her head in disbelief. "God, I can't believe this! I could seriously _kill_ Logan!"

"Well I'm glad to see you're taking this so well."

"Oh, I'm totally calm when I talk to her. She's panicking enough for the both of us; she doesn't need me to play the angry mom card. Plus, I lived through that one. If I do that, then I become my mother."

"And we all know how that turns out."

"Right." Lorelai paced back and forth in front of Sookie. "Deep down, I know it's not really her fault. Accidents happen. I mean, hello. Living proof of that!"

"But it's different when it happens to your kid."

"Exactly! I just…ugh!" She stopped pacing, pulling to a halt in front of Sookie. "I just think about everything she's worked so hard for. No kid is more deserving than she is."

"She'll still get to do all that eventually. She has it a lot easier than you did."

"And I know that, I told her as much. But Logan…he just leaves her! One minute he's asking for my permission to marry her, and the next he walks away because she's not ready. And I know she's pretending like she's okay with it, but she's not. She's freaking out, and I'm being the calm and rational one because that's what she needs right now, but I'm _not_ calm! I am definitely not calm!"

"Whoa whoa whoa, calm down!" Sookie put her hands up as though telling her to stop talking. Lorelai took a couple of deep breaths. "Okay. I know this is a terrible situation, but it's Rory we're talking about. She will face this head on like she faces all new challenges. And she has a great support system. You're here, Jackson and I are here, and she has Luke, and Lane and Zack. Plus the entire town is going to treat that baby like an angel, just like they did with Rory. She'll be fine."

"I know. _God_, I know that. I just need someone else to remind me. I hear myself telling Rory all those things, but I didn't have anyone else reminding me that she'll be fine." She took another couple of deep breaths, shaking her head. "I really want Logan to do the right thing here; the thing Christopher was incapable of doing."

"He really loved her," Sookie reminded Lorelai. "I don't think that goes away overnight."

Lorelai shrugged. "We'll see."

So Sookie had allowed Lorelai to have her freak out moment, effectively calming her down in the process. But now it was time to tell Luke.

The diner was filled with the usual breakfast crowd that morning. Luke looked up at the sound of the bell as she opened the door, giving her a half smile.

"Morning!" Lorelai said cheerily, leaning over the counter to plant a kiss on his mouth.

"Morning," Luke replied. "Coffee?"

Lorelai nodded. It was best to pretend like everything was normal for the time being.

Babette and Miss Patty were seated at a table close to the counter. "How ya doing, Dollface?" Babette asked.

"Oh, you know. Tyra Banks called begging me to be on America's Next Top Model. The usual."

"With those legs? You'd be a shoe-in," Miss Patty replied.

She smiled as Luke filled her mug. "Do you have a minute to talk?" she asked him quietly.

"Caesar's got everything under control. What's up?"

"Um…let's go upstairs for a minute."

With a puzzled look, Luke followed Lorelai out of the diner and to the apartment upstairs.

"Everything okay?" Luke asked when the door closed behind him.

"Luke, don't get mad."

He frowned, folding his arms over his chest. "So everything's not okay."

She took a breath. "Rory's pregnant."

"What?" he yelled.

"Shh! Do you want the whole diner to hear?"

"Well how did you expect me to react?"

"Calm down, Luke."

"I am calm!" he yelled.

Lorelai glared at him, and Luke took a couple of moments to get his anger under control.

"Jeeze, what the hell happened? It's like there's baby's popping up all over the place!"

"These things happen, Luke. Hello, living proof."

Luke scrunched up his face in concentration. "Okay, here's what we're gonna do. First, we're gonna kill Logan."

"We're not gonna kill Logan. Thought about it, but we're not going to kill him."

"Second, she's coming home."

"She'll be home in a few days."

"Third, she gets a job at a local paper and we come up with some sort of schedule where we watch the baby in shifts. Like, I can watch it in the afternoons during the lull between lunch and dinner, or sometimes I can take the morning off and let Caesar open. And you've got maids at the Inn, I'm sure one or two of them can be spared every once in a while to watch the baby. Whatever, we'll figure out a schedule so Rory doesn't have to stop working. She's _going_ to be a reporter; we'll make sure of that."

Lorelai was grinning from ear to ear.

"What?" Luke asked.

"Nothing." But she couldn't stop smiling. "I'm just…remembering why I proposed to you two years ago."

Luke was quiet for a while. Lorelai could tell he was deep in thought, and she didn't want to interrupt him.

"Let's just do it," he finally said.

She furrowed her brow in confusion. "What?"

"Let's just _do_ it. We've waited too long, let's just do it!"

"What, you mean elope? I'm not doing that again."

"So we'll do a big thing in the town square. Right after Rory comes home. We'll say she got some vacation days to buy some time with the rest of the town."

"That'll just make it look like we're trying to cover it up."

"No it won't. She can say that she's not feeling well at the wedding, like it's the first time she noticed. Then she goes to the doctor and boom: she finds out she's pregnant."

Lorelai shook her head. "That won't work. I already set the doctor's appointment for the day after she gets home."

"Okay, so we go downstairs and tell everyone that we're getting married next weekend. We call Rory in front of everyone telling her to come home, bring her to the diner the minute she steps off the plane, and _then_ she tells them she's not feeling well. It'll still buy her a couple of days."

Lorelai felt a little uneasy about the plan. "Are you just saying this to help Rory ease the tension of telling the town she's pregnant, or do you actually want to get married?"

Luke grabbed her by the waist, pulling her in for a deep kiss. She was grinning when they broke apart.

They didn't speak as she followed him back downstairs to the busy dinner.

"Can I have everyone's attention, please?" Luke called out, bringing the chatter in the diner to a stop.

He was serious.

* * *

><p>It was about two weeks before Rory was able to leave the campaign bus and return to Stars Hollow. She felt bad about the vague excuse she'd given to Hugo as to why she needed to leave, but Rory hadn't really wanted to clue him in to such personal information at the time. She was sad to leave, and Hugo was sad to see her go, but Rory didn't really see any way around it. She needed to go to the doctor, and Rory was positive that a doctor would not be okay with the hectic schedule she was kept on. She slept at odd times, was on her feet for hours, and rarely got to eat something that wasn't fast food. It wasn't exactly the healthiest environment for anyone, let alone a pregnant woman. She needed to be able to sleep in a bed every night, for more than four hours.<p>

So it was with sadness and regret that Rory boarded the plane back to Connecticut. However, she couldn't deny the happiness she felt upon seeing her mom waiting for her as she walked through the security checkpoint.

With a smile, Rory ran to meet Lorelai, practically knocking her over with the force of her hug.

"I've missed you!" Rory exclaimed.

"I've missed _you_!"

"Apparently airplanes make me nauseous."

"Well, honey, there's a parasite growing inside of you. Everything makes you nauseous."

"I feel really weird talking about being nauseous while we're hugging."

"You're right, let's stop." The mother and daughter pulled away from each other. Lorelai sighed, looking her daughter up and down. "How you holding up, kid?"

Rory shrugged, leading her mom over to the baggage claim area. "Sad to be leaving; glad to be home. It was getting hard to hide morning sickness from everyone."

"Any word from Logan?"

"Nope."

"Really? No calls? No texts?"

"Not a thing."

"Huh. I thought for sure he'd at least try."

Rory spotted her suitcase and pulled it off the turnstile. Lorelai took the bag from her, wheeling it behind her as they made their way to the parking garage.

"Hey, I told him that he has to figure out what he's going to do. I was very firm in telling him not to contact me until then. And I'm going to stand my ground."

"Well no arguments here, but he's never listened to you before when you asked him to stay away. Why would he do it now?"

"Because now I'm withholding contact from his kid. I didn't have anything big enough to hold over his head before."

They didn't talk much as Lorelai placed Rory's things into the back of the jeep, pulled out of the garage, and made began driving towards Stars Hollow. Finally, as they began to get closer to the exit, Lorelai broke the silence.

"So I made a doctor's appointment for you tomorrow afternoon. I figured you'd want to get a jump on things. I got the name of Sookie's doctor, so she was able to bump you up and get an appointment sooner. Two kids and another one on the way makes for a great referral."

Although Rory was grateful, she felt a little uneasy. "Thanks. Um…the rest of the town doesn't know. Do they?"

"Nope. We're using the wedding this weekend as a kind of cover up for you coming home. So you'll have a couple extra days to break it to the town, and I won't have to field questions from Mom and Dad as to why you're here. We won't be able to hold them off for long, but it'll buy you some time. Just make a point of mentioning that you're not feeling well when you go to the diner today so no one suspects that you're pregnant yet."

"And all this was Luke's idea?"

"He insisted."

"I'm really happy for you, Mom."

"Thanks." Lorelai smiled. "Of course, now if Luke and I decide to have a kid, my future grandchild is going to be older than my potential future offspring."

"Well, when did we ever do things conventionally? It'll be just like Father of the Bride 2."

"Please, Luke is way better looking than Steve Martin! And Logan is a million times better looking than Martin Short. Diane Keaton, however, can give me a run for my money. That woman looks good for her age!"

"Notice how you didn't say I'm better looking than Kimberly Williams-Paisley."

"Are you kidding? She's not even in the same league as us!"

Rory was laughing as they pulled onto her street in Stars Hollow. Then, suddenly, as the house came into view, her heat stopped.

"Oh my god!" Rory exclaimed.

"What? Honey, are you okay?"

Her eyes zoomed in on the car sitting in the driveway. Her sight shifted to the blonde figure sitting on the steps of the porch, waiting for her. She could hear her heart pounding loudly in her ears.

"Logan's _here_!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Sorry to end on a cliff hanger! I was originally going to write their conversation into this chapter. But it was getting a little long, and so much had already happened in the chapter that I didn't want their conversation to overshadow everything else that happened in this chapter. So I made the decision to save it for later, to give you something to look forward to.

Again, thank you everyone for reading and leaving such positive reviews. I love each and every one of you.


	7. Decaf Coffee and Non Alcoholic Beer

**A/N: **It seems that whenever I end a chapter on an intense cliff hanger, I manage to produce the next one a lot quicker. Hence the speedy arrival of this one. Enjoy! I had a lot of fun writing this one.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Seven – Decaf Coffee and Non Alcoholic Beer<span>

Rory stared out the windshield of the jeep in disbelief as the car pulled into the driveway. Logan looked up from his spot on the front porch at the sound of the approaching car.

"What's he doing here?" Rory asked her mom.

"I don't know!"

"Well, did you tell him when I was coming home?"

"No, I haven't talked to him since your graduation party."

"So how did he know?"

"Why don't you get out of the car and talk to him, hun?"

But Rory remained glued to her seat, still in shock.

Lorelai shook her head, and with a heavy sigh left her daughter sitting in the jeep. "Hi, Logan!" said Lorelai brightly as she pulled Rory's suitcase from the back of the car and proceeded to drag it into the house.

Logan stood up. "Lorelai," he replied, nodding in her direction. "How've you been?"

"Oh, you know. Some idiot knocked up my kid. Like mother, like daughter."

Logan winced.

"I think she's in shock," Lorelai continued. She'd reached the house now, and Rory still hadn't so much as unbuckled her seatbelt.

She watched as Logan glanced in Rory's direction, chuckling.

"Crap," Rory mumbled, fumbling for the buckle of her seatbelt as she stumbled out of the car. She silently willed her hear to stop beating so quickly as she approached Logan. He looked a little too gleeful for their current situation, and it was bugging her.

Rory waited until her mother had firmly closed the front door behind her, leaving the two of them standing in the front yard alone. She frowned, folding her arms across her chest.

"What are you doing here, Logan?" Rory asked, traces of anger seeping into her voice.

But her annoyance only seemed to amuse him. "Hello to you too."

"Do you think this is funny?"

His smile faded quickly. "Rory – "

"This isn't a game, Logan! You can't just show up out of the blue – "

"Whoa, Rory! Calm down for a minute." Logan took a step closer to her, reaching out his arm as if to touch her shoulder. Then, as though realizing the gesture might not be appropriate anymore, made a fist with his hand instead, and let his arm fall to his side.

"You told me that I needed to figure out what I was going to do. I kept my word. Now I'm trying to tell you what I decided."

"You can't just call like a normal person?" she snapped.

Logan sighed. "Is this how it's always going to be? Are you just going to jump down my throat at everything I say?" Noticing that his voice was escalating, Logan made a controlled effort to whisper the next part. "I didn't _mean_ to get you pregnant, Rory. You know that. We're both at fault for that, so if you're going to keep blaming me for this – "

"I'm not _blaming_ you!" Rory cried.

"Then what is it, Rory? Huh? Why are you so mad at me now? I came here to try and show you how I plan on being in _our_ kid's life, as per your request. So please, do you want to clue me in on what I could have possibly done this time to piss you off? Did you change your mind since the last time we spoke? Because I don't care what you say, Rory. I'm going to be involved whether you like it or not, and I'd really prefer it if you didn't treat me like the enemy when I'm only trying to do exactly what you wanted."

Each time he called her 'Rory' felt like a knife stabbing into her gut. "No, I haven't changed my mind."

"Are you still mad that I yelled at you? I already apologized profusely for that."

"Of course not."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I don't know!" Rory exclaimed. She sighed, rubbing her temples with her fingers. "I don't know what's wrong with me."

The frustration Logan had been feeling towards Rory crumbled. He tried to remember what Tracy told him before he left Palo Alto. Tracy had reminded him that the pregnancy was going to cause Rory's hormones to go a little crazy. He had to try to be a little more understanding of her mood swings.

"Why don't we sit down," Logan suggested. Rory nodded, and lead him up the steps to the bench on the porch. They sat together in silence for a little while.

"Rory, are you okay?" Logan asked.

"You keep calling me 'Rory,'" she blurted out before she could stop herself.

Logan frowned. "What?"

"You never call me that. You always call me Ace. Even before we were dating, you always called me Ace. You only ever called me Rory when you were being serious or…or when we…when we were intimate." Rory blushed. "And now you won't even call me that. You only call me Rory."

"I…" Logan hadn't even noticed that he was doing it.

"Did I really hurt you that much?" she whispered.

"Ror – No, of course not." He hadn't stopped himself in time before using her name. The truth of it was she _had_ hurt him. But his anger was unjustified, he saw that now.

Rory chocked out a sob. "God, I hate this already. Don't you hate this? Why can't we just be normal?"

"It's not your fault."

But Rory had already worked up a full head of steam. "I just hate this all already. I hate that you can't just call me Ace like everything's normal, because it isn't normal. Look at us. We can't get through a conversation without arguing, or without me crying. I hate that I'm going to have to tell the entire town why I'm really home soon, and they're all going to be so disappointed in me. And my grandpa is going to hate me."

"He's not going to hate you."

"And my mom is being so supportive and perfect and scheduling doctor's appointments while I'm just sitting here freaking out every five seconds, jumping down your throat for reasons I can't even figure out. And I just feel like I'm the only one freaking out about this. Why am I the only one freaking out? Shouldn't other people be freaking out too?"

"Hey, you are _not_ the only one freaking out," Logan insisted.

She gave him a skeptical look, whipping the tears from her eyes.

"I've been having minor panic attacks on and off pretty much since the day you told me you were pregnant. But I've also been making plans and trying to figure out how I'm going to make those plans work, which helped to alleviate most of them. Bu the truth is, I don't have a clue what I'm doing."

They remained in silence for a while.

"What if I'm a terrible mother?" Rory said softly.

"Rory – "

She winced noticeably. Logan squeezed his eyes shut tightly, kicking himself inwardly for causing her more pain accidentally.

"Okay, first of all, you are _not_ going to be a terrible mother. You are caring, incredibly organized and detail oriented, kind, hard working, smart, and loving." _Not to mention incredibly beautiful, and pretty much everything I could ever hope the mother of my children would be_, Logan thought. "You were the only positive influence that I ever had in my life. If you can help an underachiever like me figure out how to get his act together, then you are more than capable of raising a child of your own."

She tried not to let his kind words of encouragement effect her. "Do you really think so?"

"Of course I do." Logan wanted to remind her more than anything how much he'd wanted her to be his wife. Not only that, he'd wanted them to be a family. He still wanted that. But Rory was right about one thing: they weren't normal. Even if Logan thought there was an opening for him to make a move, it wouldn't be a good idea. Logan had learned the hard way that things can't just magically be fixed because he wanted them to be. He thought back to the fight they'd had about the bridesmaids, and how he'd tried to fix the problem by explaining his point of view and begging Rory to come home with him. It hadn't worked in the slightest. Rory had stayed mad at him, and he in response had gone off to Costa Rica without so much as a second thought, and ended up nearly killing himself when he drunkenly fell off a cliff.

Logan couldn't afford to screw this one up. He needed to be patient.

"I know that are last few conversations have been a little awkward, but we _will_ get back to normal eventually. Okay?"

Rory nodded, although she didn't quite believe him. In order for them to be back to normal, they needed to be a couple. That was normal for them. Rory wasn't sure if she even knew how to be around Logan and _not_ be with him. That was something she'd need to relearn.

"I moved to Connecticut," Logan finally said, interrupting Rory's thoughts.

She frowned. "What?"

"That's what I've been doing. You told me to figure things out, and I did. So I moved back to Connecticut."

Rory shook her head in disbelief. "Logan. I didn't tell you to move here."

"I know, but I had to."

"All I meant was that I wanted some kind of schedule. Like, you'd come out here at least once a month to visit or something, and you'd call every Tuesday night. Something like that. I wasn't trying to tell you that you needed to pick up your entire life."

"But that's not enough. Don't you get it, Rory? You were absolutely right about everything. Both of our fathers were never around, and I don't want that to be me. I don't want my child to always wonder where I am. And I want to do everything the complete opposite of the way my own father did things. In order to do that, I can't settle for sporadic visits and phone calls. We can't be living on opposite ends of the country. And I wasn't about to let you move to California, away from your entire family, just to make that happen. Maybe things would be different if we hadn't broken up; I don't know. But this is the way it has to be done."

Rory was having a little trouble believing what Logan was telling her.

"But your job – "

"Taken care of."

She was getting frustrated with him. "What does that mean?"

"You don't have to worry about it, Rory. I'm not going to bolt."

"But…you were so excited about that job, Logan. Are you _sure_ – "

Logan sighed, placing a reassuring hand on her knee. "The day after you came to see me I went into the office and straight into a meeting with the other partners. I told them that, unfortunately, I had to move back home, there was no avoiding it, and so I had no choice but to leave the company. Instead, they had another idea."

Rory frowned in confusion. "I don't get it."

"Well, apparently HPG was looking into buying this new company in Hartford. But the whole thing started to fall through when the CEO and VP met with my dad. It seems they don't particularly like Mitchum too much, and are hesitant to work for him. So one of the guys that works there knows Bobbie, and he remembered her experience with HPG. They go to her for advice, and she sends them in my direction. They've been working on some kind of merger of the two companies. My dad has no idea that he's about to lose this company."

She was floored. "Are you serious?"

"Completely. My partners didn't want to say anything in case the whole deal fell through, in case it got back to my dad somehow. But it looks like this is going to work. These guys really like the fact that we're basically the complete opposite of my dad. If this merger goes smoothly, there might be even further expansions in a few years."

"So wait, where do you factor in with all this?"

"Well, we were going to send someone else out to manage the new Hartford office, but I'm going to do that instead. I handed off control of my project to someone else. These guys in Hartford need a lot of help; their web presence is a bit of a mess. Now, I might need to take business trips back to Palo Alto every couple of months, but other than that I'm not going anywhere."

Logan grinned when he finished telling Rory his story. He was very happy with how well things had worked out. Logan would have been more than willing to leave his job for Rory and the baby, but he was glad they were able to work something else out instead.

Rory, on the other hands, was hesitant. This isn't what she had expected. She wasn't quite sure of his reasoning. Was he trying to prove that he wasn't his father? Was he doing this for Rory? Or was he really just trying to do what he thought was best for everyone?

"Are you _absolutely sure_ that this is what you want? Because once you make this decision, you can't change your mind. You can't decide that doing this whole single parenting, joint custody thing is too much for you and suddenly leave."

He felt slightly crestfallen at the mention of 'single parenting' and 'joint custody.' It was as though Rory was reminding them both of where they stood. She was Rory and he was Logan, and they were not together. But that didn't change his mind one bit

Logan smiled, genuinely smiled. He hadn't done that in a long time. "I am one hundred percent positive that _this_ is what I want to do."

And with his reassurance, Rory felt her tension ease a bit. She wouldn't have to do this completely alone. She was still by herself, of course. But at the very least, Logan would be there to help her out as much as possible. What's more, he _wanted_ to be there.

"I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Do you want to come?"

Logan felt himself relax a bit at her suggestion. Rory wasn't mad at him. She wasn't going to ban him from contact with his kid. Maybe they _could_ figure this out after all.

"Of course," he told her. "I'll pick you up in the morning?"

Rory nodded in agreement. "Um. You haven't told anyone else. Have you?"

"Just Colin and Finn. Why?"

Rory's face flushed a little. "Well, I'm trying to keep this from the rest of the town and my grandparents for at least another week. So if you could just…not tell your parents yet, that would be great."

Logan frowned. "Why do they think you're home, then?"

"My mom and Luke are getting married this weekend. I'm saying that I got some time off for the wedding. It'll just make telling everyone that much easier if I happen to find out that I'm pregnant while I'm home rather than having to explain my sudden reappearance in Connecticut. Plus, it buy's me a little more time."

Logan could understand that sentiment. He wasn't exactly looking forward to telling his parents that Rory was pregnant. His father would tell him how careless and irresponsible he was, while his mother would use it as yet another occasion to bash Rory.

"I'll keep it from them for as long as I can, but they're going to find out eventually. It'll be better it comes from me rather than an outside source."

Rory nodded in agreement. "I'll let you know when it's okay to say something." Finally, she stood up from her seat, stretching her legs. "I'm glad you came, Logan. Really."

"Anytime," he replied, rising as well. He had almost called her 'Ace,' but after the conversation they'd had earlier, it almost seemed weird. Eventually he would say it again, but at least for today's purposes, he needed to keep things formal. It was important to remind himself of where they stood.

Logan reached out as if to embrace her, but then dropped his arms back to his sides. He didn't know how to say goodbye to her anymore.

"Congratulate your mom for me," he said instead. He gave her one last smile before making his way back to his car.

Logan turned around halfway there, walking backwards. "So I'll see you tomorrow then."

Rory folded her arms across her chest, unsure of what to do with them. "Okay."

She stood quietly on the front porch, watching as he got into the driver's seat, backed out of the driveway, and headed out of Stars Hollow towards the highway.

She hadn't even noticed her mother's presence at her side a minute after he'd left.

"What'd he say?" Lorelai questioned eagerly.

Rory let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Then a smile broke across her face. "He moved back to Connecticut so he could be closer to the baby."

* * *

><p>Rory awoke the next morning to the smell of coffee drifting in from under the crack in her door. It smelled heavenly. She sniffed at the air, sighing at the smell as her brain, fuzzy with sleep, slowly pulled itself into consciousness. Then, all at once, her eyes snapped opened.<p>

She hadn't exactly made a conscious decision to stop drinking coffee after finding out she was pregnant. Instead, she had been so stressed out and jittery that the idea of any additional stimulation was a complete turn off. But now things had changed. She still had a lot of things to worry about (such as telling her grandparents, finding an apartment, finding a job, and the whole raising a child thing) the tension she'd been feeling for the last few weeks wasn't nearly as great as it had been. Getting home and Logan had been her two biggest worries over the past couple of weeks. Now that both of those issues were resolved, her stress levels had lowered considerably. With two less things to worry about, Rory had been able to sleep through the night with very little tossing and turning.

Maybe that was why the smell of coffee suddenly sounded so appealing to her. Rory couldn't remember a day going by where she didn't drink at least one cup of the heavenly liquid. Her last detox had been when she had the stomach flu; the acidity of her beloved coffee had made her stomach angry. By the time she was finally well enough to drink the stuff again, she'd been in such a state of withdrawal that she had nearly ten cups in a row.

But this case was different. Rory was pregnant. She hadn't had a chance to do her research yet, what with being on the road, but everything Rory had ever heard told her that she wasn't supposed to have caffeine while pregnant.

Rory pulled on her bathrobe and shuffled into the kitchen to find an interesting scene. The entire kitchen table was filled with coffee. There were ceramic mugs and take away containers from Luke's. The coffee pot was filled with what looked like a freshly brewed pot. The kitchen closely resembled a café.

Lorelai practically danced her way into the kitchen. "Morning!" she sang, extracting a steaming cup from the overflowing table and taking a long sip.

Rory glared at her mother. "What's all this?"

"_Weeeell_, I really wanted some coffee this morning, so I ran out to Luke's and picked some up. But then, silly me, I _completely_ forgot that I'd already made some!" Lorelai smacked her forehead, mimicking the gesture of a forgetful person.

"There's enough coffee here for a small army!" Rory exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at the table.

"One can never have too much coffee, dear." With that statement, Lorelai drained her mug quickly. "Mmm. Good 'till the last drop."

Rory glared angrily at her mother. "I hate you."

Lorelai mimicked a look of shock, gasping and bringing her hand to her chest in surprise. "Whatever do you mean, my lovely daughter? Is that any way to treat your wonderful, loving mother?"

"You know I can't drink coffee!"

"Why in the world not?"

"Because – " Rory was at a loss for words. She glared at Lorelai. "You _know_ why. Because I'm pregnant!"

"Well that's too bad." Lorelai selected another cup and took in the smell of the coffee before taking a sip. "My, this is some _wonderful_ coffee. It's too bad you can't have some."

"Have I mentioned that I really hate you?"

Lorelai smiled an almost evil smile. "I love you too, kid!"

There was a knock at the door, causing Rory to jump.

"Crap, is that Logan already? Why didn't you wake me sooner?"

Lorelai shrugged.

"Well, I'm not even dressed yet! You have to get the door."

But Lorelai only raised her eyebrows, taking another sip of her coffee. "Hey, he didn't knock me up."

"Mom – "

There was another knock.

"You better get that, hun. Wouldn't want to keep him waiting."

Rory groaned in frustration as she shuffled towards the front door. "Mean!" she called over her shoulder, causing Lorelai to laugh heartily.

She pulled the door opened to a surprised looking Logan. He took in the sight of her in pajamas, fuzzy pink slippers, and a light blue bathrobe. He eyed her from head to toe, smirking in amusement at her appearance.

"New look for you, Ace?"

Rory opened her mouth to give him a sarcastic reply only to snap it shut again. He'd called her Ace.

"Um." The use of her old nick name had thrown her off a bit. "No. I just…slept a little late." Rory tried to keep the smile from creeping across her lips, but all she could think about was the fact that he'd called her Ace.

"Well unless you want to go to the doctor's dressed like that…" Logan eyed her up and down one more time, smirking.

Rory gave her head a quick shake, trying to clear the fog that had overcome it. "Right. Um. I'm just going to get changed. Why don't you come in?"

Logan followed her into the kitchen, stopping short at the sight of all the coffee on the table. Lorelai was seated on one of the chairs with one leg crossed over the other, sipping a mug as though she didn't have a care in the world.

"Morning, Logan!" Lorelai said cheerily.

He eyed the table warily. "Uh…what's with all the coffee?"

Rory groaned. "My mom's trying to be funny. Please ignore her while I get changed."

Logan shifted awkwardly from one foot to the other as he stood alone in the kitchen with Rory's mother. Logan wasn't sure what he was supposed to say to his ex girlfriend's mom when the last time he saw her, he was proposing to her daughter. In addition, he happened to have impregnated her daughter. It wasn't exactly an ideal situation.

"So…" Logan said awkwardly, shoving his hands deep into his pockets.

"Do you want some coffee, Logan?" Lorelai asked loudly. "I have plenty."

"Uh…"

"If you so much as drink _one sip_ of coffee in front of me while I'm pregnant with your baby, I will make sure that this is the only offspring you ever conceive!" Rory yelled, her voice muffled by her bedroom door. "In fact, the appendage responsible for said baby will no longer be attached to your body!"

Lorelai was laughing at the threat. "I don't know why you don't just have some coffee, kid. I drank coffee _all the time_ when I was pregnant with you, and you turned out okay. No extra limbs or anything."

"Yes, and look how well that turned out for me. You made me a caffeine addict!"

"Better a coffee addict than a cocaine addict. Lindsay Lohan got arrested for a DUI in May, is that what you want?"

"You're impossible!"

Lorelai giggled to herself, leaving them in silence again. Logan felt like he should say something, but what was there to say. That he was sorry? That didn't seem right. He _was_ sorry that it had come to this, but apologizing didn't feel right. "Lorelai, I – "

"You don't have to say anything," she cut him off, her tone completely serious.

Logan nodded.

"No one understands more than me what it's like to have your world turned upside down by a pregnancy," Lorelai continued. "So I'm finding it really hard to hate you for something that I've done myself."

"If it's any consolation, I never wanted this to happen to her either. We did everything we could to prevent this."

"What matters is that you're doing the right thing here. You're not going to leave her to deal with this all on her own."

"I would never do that," Logan told her, all sincerity in his voice.

Lorelai looked like she believed him. "Look. I'm not exactly thrilled about this. But Rory's my baby, and I will do everything I can to help her. So as long as you continue to do the right thing, I'll try my best to fend off the vultures."

Logan frowned in confusion. "Vultures?"

"You know. My parents. Your parents."

"Oh right, _those _vultures."

Rory stepped out of her room wearing jeans and a nice shirt. She opened her mouth as though to say something, promptly closed it again, and held up a finger.

"Excuse me for one second," she told them, and proceeded to walk down the hall until Logan heard the click of a door closing.

"I'd go take care of that if I were you," Lorelai suggested as she finished her mug and placed it in the sink. When Logan continued to look confused, Lorelai continued. "Morning sickness. Welcome to pre parenthood, kid."

* * *

><p>"I can't do this, Logan!"<p>

They were in the car, on their way to the doctor's office, when Rory had suddenly blurted out the thought that had been running through her mind all morning.

Logan started to reach a hand across the center console to place it reassuringly on her knee, only to think better of his action and place it instead on the gear shift.

"Rory, we talked about this. You're going to be a great mom."

"No, not that. I can't go the next nine months without drinking any coffee!"

Logan chuckled.

"I'm being serious, Logan! Do you know how hard it is for me to go that long without coffee? I _love_ coffee!"

"I _know_ you love coffee, Ace." He was still laughing at her outburst.

"No, you don't understand. I can't remember a time in my life when I wasn't drinking coffee. For my sixteenth birthday, Luke made me a coffee cake and left it on a table at the diner that morning. When I went back to Yale and you were waiting for me at the coffee cart after the breakup mishap, I had a panic attack because I thought I'd have to stop drinking coffee! I _need_ coffee, Logan!"

"So switch to decaf."

Rory laughed. "_Switch to decaf_? Are you crazy? That's like if I asked you to only drink non alcoholic beer. What's the point?"

Logan didn't think there was a safe answer to this question. Luckily, Rory didn't seem to be looking for one.

"I should just drink the coffee. My mom drank coffee when she was pregnant with me and I turned out okay, right?"

"Yes." Logan found it better to agree with her.

"But _what if_ I'm the exception to the rule? What if, say, one in 5 women who drink coffee while pregnant produce normal babies, while the rest had babies with an extra toe or something! I don't want a baby with an extra toe!"

"I really don't think that's what will happen if you drink coffee, Ace."

"But how do you know? What if they just haven't produced an official study yet linking extra toes to caffeine intake during pregnancy? Maybe they're still doing the research!"

She was talking so fast that she was hardly taking time to catch her breath.

Suddenly, a new worry occurred to Rory.

"Oh my god! I haven't done any research yet. I don't know the first thing about pregnancy! I don't know what food's I'm supposed to eat. Aren't pregnant women supposed to take special vitamins or something? What if the baby hasn't been getting the right nutrients? I could have screwed up the baby!"

"Rory – " She was starting to enter full on panic attack.

"Oh my god! I just realized…I had champagne at my graduation party! And at graduation! I had to have been pregnant at that point. And I _know_ that you're not supposed to drink alcohol when you're pregnant."

"Ace!" Logan exclaimed with a laugh. "I'm sure that everything's fine. You can ask the doctor yourself when we get there. As for the research…"

As they pulled up to a stop light, Logan reached across to the passenger's seat and popped opened the glove compartment. A think book fell out, tumbling to the floor.

She picked it up, reading the title out loud. "_What To Expect When You're Expecting_."

"My secretary gave it to me. I read quite a lot of it on the flight back home. Consider it your first of the many books I'm sure you will buy."

Rory felt her heart clench in her chest. Logan had a pregnancy book. He was doing research.

She wanted so much to lean over the center console and kiss him. But they weren't together anymore. It was kind of ironic, really. They'd broken up because Rory wasn't ready to get married and Logan wanted an even bigger commitment only for her to discover that she was pregnant, linking them together for the rest of their lives, whether they liked it or not. It would have been different if she wasn't pregnant. They'd both be able to live the separate lives they'd agreed to. And now, because of those actions, they were living separate lives parallel to each other.

Alanis Morissette knew nothing of irony.

How long could she do it? Could she really not be with him for the rest of her life when he would always be right there? She didn't know if she could. Logan was being so sweet and caring. He'd moved across the country for the baby, and when she got sick that morning he'd followed her into the bathroom and stroked her hair, rubbing soothing circles into her back. He'd let her freak out and panic, taking in all of her crazy outbursts. She could only imagine the millions of other things that he would no doubt do for her throughout the next nine months. How in the world was she supposed to do this with him without _being_ with him?

It would be so much easier if she could just tell him that she was, in fact, ready to get married. But she wasn't. Even though her main reason for turning him down had become a mote point, the idea of marriage itself still terrified her. She didn't feel ready for it, nor did she feel ready to be a mother.

Then there were her fears about Logan. He could have moved on by now. It was a possibility she needed to consider. After all, he was so ready to walk away when she'd said no. Maybe her rejection had been the catalyst, one which caused him to immediately begin moving on. Then, suddenly, Rory became terrified of the thought of seeing him with another woman. She didn't know if she could handle watching him fall in love with someone else, not when her child shared his DNA.

She started crying before she even realized it, and once she did it became a full on sob.

Logan glanced over at the sound of her sobs. Then, as realization hit him, he quickly pulled the car over to the side of the road.

"Rory, what's wrong?" he asked her with concern. This only caused her to sob harder. Logan unbuckled his seat belt and got out of the car, walking around to the passenger's side. He opened her door and crouched down next to her, gathering her into his arms.

"Tell me what's wrong," Logan said again when her breathing was finally under control.

She couldn't tell him the real reason for her freak out; it was too much. So she tried to explain it to him in another way.

"Do you ever get the feeling that the last couple of months just aren't real? The proposal, the break up, you moving to California, me getting a job following Barak Obama, the pregnancy, and then both of us right back here in Connecticut? I just feel like…like I don't have any control over anything anymore. And I'm trying to figure out what I want in order to _get_ everything back under control, but now there are all these other outside factors I have to consider, and it's all too much. Every time I solve one problem, it's like another three pop up out of nowhere. And I don't know if I can handle it."

He gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. He wasn't sure exactly what she was talking about, but he did know how to answer her. "Well then, I will do everything I can to help you figure out how to solve them."

Rory sighed. "That's just it. You can't help me figure everything out. Some things I need to do on my own."

"Such as?"

"Like…" What was Rory supposed to say? "Like the fact that you're my ex boyfriend, but you're still in my life, and always will be."

It would have been so easy to just tell her that he didn't have to be her ex boyfriend, not if she didn't want him to be. But Logan knew that it wasn't a good idea. The many reminders she'd given him that they were no longer together, and of the prospect of single parenthood and joint custody was more than enough of an indication for him. Her plans for the future did not involve him.

"Kind of like how the ex girlfriend that I proposed to turned me down only for me to find out that she's pregnant after we split up."

Rory's eyes widened in horror. "Logan, I didn't mean – "

"I'm sorry it's so hard for you to be around me," he said flatly.

She wanted to cry again, but was afraid to do so in front of him. "How about…let's not discuss the state of our relationship at least for the foreseeable future. I think we just both need a little space from the issue. So from now on, no more talking about how we were, the break up, or how we're supposed to act around each other now. Then maybe, in a couple of months when it's all not so fresh, we can revisit the subject if need be. For now, let's just focus on the baby, and figuring out how we're going to handle that. Okay?"

Logan nodded I agreement. It was probably a good idea. He needed to stop dwelling so much on his feelings for Rory and trying to figure out how to get her back, because that might not happen. He was stuck with her in his life for good now. Most of their arguments lately revolved around the way their relationship had ended, which was doing nothing to help get them back to a state of normalcy. And he didn't want to fight with her anymore.

With a sigh, he went back around to the driver's side of his car, pulling back onto the road to drive the rest of the way to the doctor's office.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I actually ended up spending hours researching ultrasounds and prenatal visits and only to end up pushing the doctor's visit off to the next chapter because this one was getting too long. However, I'm sure that all the Rory and Logan interaction will have made up for it.


	8. Alien Fetus

**A/N: **As I said with the new AE chapter I posted this afternoon, I am SO SORRY for the delay! I've had this chapter almost finished for a while now, but then real life got the better of me, hence the delay. So I've been working my butt off to get this finished and posted.

This chapter is a little shorter than usual, but it contains a lot of necessary information for the story. It's a little slow to begin with because I'm dumping a lot of factual information out there, but it picks up a bit towards the end.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Eight – Alien Fetus<span>

Rory had never had a more extensive doctor's appointment in her entire life. Then again, she probably should have expected her first prenatal visit to be long.

First a nurse came in and gave Rory a general physical exam, taking all the necessary vitals. She was then joined by the doctor, who also happened to be the physician Sookie used for all of her pregnancies, including her current one.

"I'm Dr. Reese," he said as he entered the room, glancing down at the clipboard containing all of Rory's medical history. "You must be the expectant mother, Lorelai Gilmore?"

"I go by Rory," she explained. "My mother named me after herself; it's a long story."

He nodded. "So I take it that makes you the father."

"Logan Huntzberger," Logan replied, extending a hand to shake with the doctor.

"Nice to meet you both. Sookie mentioned you on her last visit, and if you're anything like her, I'm sure we'll get along just fine."

Rory had never had a doctor's visit where they ran so many tests and asked her so many questions about her medical history. She felt a little awkward when discussing her menstruation cycle in front of Logan; even if they were still together, it wasn't something they normally discussed at much length.

"Is it typical for birth control to fail?" Rory finally asked. The question had been nagging her ever since she found out she was pregnant in the first place.

"It's really more common than you might think," Dr. Reese reassured her. "Nearly half of all pregnancies are unplanned, and of those, nearly half of the women used some form of contraception. Generally, failure occurs from an error in use. You could have missed a pill or taken it at the wrong time. Even when you use it correctly 100% of the time, there's still a chance your birth control could fail."

Although Rory felt slightly reassured that this wasn't some weird occurrence, she still had a nagging feeling at the back of her mind. She'd never once missed a pill. Did she?

Rory glanced quickly at Logan before lowering her eyes again. She didn't want to bring up her doubts about whether or not she'd missed a pill in front of the doctor, and especially to Logan. What if it was her fault? What if Logan changed his mind because of it? It was so nice that he wanted to be involved. She knew that her mother hadn't been given that same luxury. Chris couldn't handle it, and Lorelai's parents had been so overbearing that she snuck out of the house the night she went into labor in order to avoid them, choosing instead to go to the hospital completely alone. Lorelai had never once complained about those circumstances; however Rory knew that, deep down, her mother wished it could have been different.

The doctor continued asking her question after question, and even asked Logan a couple of questions regarding his family's medical history.

"Are there any other questions you have before we take a look at the ultrasound?"

"Can she drink coffee?" Logan asked the doctor quickly. "She's kind of a caffeine addict, and her mother drank coffee all throughout her pregnancy. But I've heard you're not supposed to."

"Generally it's okay to have a little bit of caffeine as long as you keep it to only 1 or 2 small cups a day. Any more and you increase the risk of an underweight baby. Just make sure you limit your coffee intake. Maybe switch to half cafe/half decaf if you can't cut it down to 2 cups. Otherwise, you have nothing to worry about."

"See, Ace?" Logan said, smirking at her. "No fear of extra toes."

Rory was nervous about the ultrasound. Up until that moment, the only real proof she'd had that she was pregnant was a few pregnancy tests and the nausea. Actually seeing it on a screen would be a different matter entirely.

She wished she could ask Logan to hold her hand. She'd never felt sadder about the fact that they weren't together than at that moment, when she wanted desperately to take comfort in his touch.

It took a few seconds before she was able to see more than just shades of grey.

"This area is your bladder," Dr. Reese pointed out. "Here's your uterus. This black area is the sac. And that grey blob right here is your baby."

Rory frowned. "It doesn't look like much."

"No, it's still developing its arms and legs. If you look carefully, you can see the buds where they're going to form." He pointed them out, but they still kind of looked like a grey blob to Rory.

"Here's the head," said Dr. Reese, pointing out the slightly larger circle. "The butt is over here."

Rory watched as the blob moved around a little bit, and Dr. Reese zoomed in on the picture. A red line appeared across the screen as he ran it along that of the tiny blob.

"You're measuring at 7 weeks 5 days, which lines up with your expected due date of February 1. Now that's only an estimation, so you could go into labor a few weeks before or after that."

It seemed so far away to Rory.

"Do you see that small flutter in the middle right there?" Dr. Reese pointed to a small bit of movement within the grey blob. "That's the baby's heartbeat." He then brought the heartbeat up on the screen. Rory watched the lines go up and down quickly, measuring the heart rate. Dr. Reese then brought up the sound, and Rory listened to what sounded like rapid drumming.

"Oh my god," she whispered, biting down on her lower lip. "There's an alien growing inside me."

Logan chuckled softly. He'd remained quiet while watching the ultrasound, not wanting to freak out Rory. However, inside he could feel his pulse quicken. His palms had grown sweaty as panic overtook him. He wasn't ready to have a baby.

"Wow," he finally said, his voice cracking slightly, although not enough for Rory to notice. "Look at that."

Now, suddenly, the whole thing was real and scary. And completely terrifying.

"You'll be happy to know there's only one in there," Dr. Reese added. "Everything else looks good. I'll print out some pictures for you, and you can get dressed and be on your way. I'll see you again in one month."

* * *

><p>Logan barely spoke a word as he drove her back to Stars Hollow. His silence scared Rory. Was the reality of her pregnancy finally starting to hit home? Did he realize the life he was giving up by deciding to move home to be father to a child with a woman who turned him down? Was he going to change his mind and leave again?<p>

"Thanks for coming," Rory said softly as Logan pulled into her driveway and put the car in park.

"Sure," he replied, staring straight ahead blankly. It only added to her nerves. The last time she'd seen him this quiet was after the dinner they'd had at his parents' house, just after they'd started dating exclusively. He was so shaken by his mother and grandfather's reaction to her that Rory almost thought Logan was going to break up with her. This, however, was a little bigger than just his family's disapproval.

She hesitated with her hand on the door handle. "Are you okay?" she asked, turning back to face Logan.

"I'm fine," he insisted with a shrug.

"Are you sure? You're not…" Rory sighed.

The worry apparent in her voice made Logan turn towards her. "I'm not what?"

"You're not going to change your mind, are you? About moving here?"

Logan studied her face carefully. He saw her genuine worry on her face, as though she was scared that he was about to bolt at any second.

But his fears were in no way doubts about his decision.

"Do you really think I'd do that?"

Rory shrugged. "I'm not sure if I know what you would or wouldn't do anymore."

"Rory."

She shook her head. "Don't, okay? I can't do the 'us' thing right now. I'm just trying to say that I don't want to presume to know how you'd react anymore. And you haven't said a word since the ultrasound, so the only explanation I can come up with is that you're rethinking this whole arrangement."

Logan wanted to reach for her, to show her some physical form of comfort and reassurance. But he didn't think it was his place.

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly.

"Hey," Logan said, a smile creeping across his lips. He couldn't help it. No matter what had happened to them, the vulnerability she showed still tugged at his heart.

Rory looked at him, hugging her arms around her chest.

"My doubts have nothing to do with backing out on my responsibility as a father. I'm doubting whether or not I'm prepared for this in the first place. Whether or not _we're_ prepared for this. Aren't you…?"

"Scared?" Rory finished for him.

Logan nodded.

"Completely freaked out. There's an alien growing in my uterus, and I don't know how to handle it. I have no idea if I'm even ready for this. But my mom did it when she was sixteen. I mean, if she could do it, so can we."

He felt slightly more reassured, knowing that he wasn't the only one scared. That shook him out of it a little. Rory was giving up much more than he was. He needed to be stronger for her. She was freaking out enough as it was without worrying about him leaving, something he was never going to do in the first place.

"I promise you, Rory, I have no intension of leaving. I made a commitment, and I'm going to see it through. You have nothing to worry about."

But there was still doubt showing on Rory's face. "Are you sure? You're not going to change your mind in like a year when there's an infant and you can't figure out how to make it stop crying?"

Logan smiled. "Nothing will make me change my mind. I promise."

Guilt overtook her. She'd been keeping to herself the realization that she was responsible for the pregnancy. If she was going to tell Logan, she had to do it now.

"I missed a pill," Rory finally said.

His smile faltered. "What?"

Rory swallowed the lump that had been forming in her throat. "The day of my graduation party. I never took my pill. I was getting ready and then I remembered that I forgot to take it in the morning, and I was _going _to take it, but then we…" Rory trailed off, blushing furiously.

_The apartment was covered with boxes. It was sad, really, to think that she'd no longer be living there soon. Rory didn't know _where_ she'd be. Paris and Doyle were off to India for the summer, then to Boston while Paris attended medical school. Logan still hadn't heard about the job in Palo Alto. And as for Rory…she had no job prospects. She hadn't gotten the New York Times internship, and she'd turned down the job at the Providence Journal. Yet for some reason, Rory wasn't worried. Logan's return had helped to ease many of the worries she'd been having about her future. _

"_Soon, you'll graduate from Yale and start a new chapter in your life," he told her. "Something new and exciting will come along soon, Ace, I promise you."_

_And with one smile, all her fears melted away. _

_They'd been busy packing everything into boxes and making minor repairs on the apartment all day. Paris and Doyle had gone out to have dinner with Paris's Nana, leaving the apartment empty except for Rory and Logan. It wasn't even until she was putting the finishing touches on her makeup, getting ready for the graduation party that she realized that she forgot to take her birth control that morning. She glanced at her watch. She was a few hours late. She should be fine, as long as she took it right away. She'd read somewhere that as long as you take it within five hours of the expected time, she should be protected._

_Rory pulled the strip of pills out of the medicine cabinet, and popped out the appropriate one. Logan entered the bathroom just as she was pouring herself a glass of water to swallow the pill with._

"_How much time do we have?" he asked her._

_She set down the glass, turning over her wrist to check the time on her watch. "About 15 minutes before the party starts."_

_Logan smirked, a mischievous glint in his eye. "You can't show up to your own party on time, Ace. Gotta leave your guests in suspense."_

_Rory rolled her eyes. "Tell that to my grandmother."_

_He slowly closed the distance between them, wrapping his arms around her waist. "Not even if you're late because you were taking advantage of the only alone time you've had with your boyfriend in weeks?"His voice was low and sultry as he whispered into her ear. It sent a shiver up her spine. _

_She grinned despite herself, snaking her arms around his neck. "Not sure that would fall under the Emily Gilmore realm of approval."_

_But Logan wasn't listening. Instead, he was kissing a trail up her neck, to her ear, across her jaw. Rory's eyelids fluttered shut as she impulsively extended her neck to give him better access. She hummed in delight and hugged herself closer to him._

"_Did I mention how much I missed you while I was away?"Logan mumbled against her skin. The vibrations from his lips made her tingle. _

"_I believe you left that out when you got back," she teased him. Her hands moved to his hair, running his soft locks between her fingers. _

"_I really missed you, Ace." He nipped at her lower lip, causing a slight whimper to escape. _

"_You're not playing fair," Rory insisted as he continued to place soft kisses all along her neck and face, refusing to increase the intensity of his ministrations. _

"_How so?" he asked as he pulled her earlobe between his teeth. Rory's breath hitched. _

"_We really shouldn't," she mumbled, although her resolve was weakening. "We're supposed to leave, like, right now."_

_Finally, Logan kissed her hard on the mouth, his tongue sweeping across her bottom lip as he sucked it into his mouth. Rory stumbled back against the bathroom counter, gripping his shoulders tightly in order to keep balanced. _

_Logan pulled back and rested his forehead against hers, slightly out of breath. "Do you want me to stop?" he panted. "We can stop right now and go to the party. Pick this up again later."_

_But his hands were running up and down her arms, and his breath was hot against her skin. _

"_Later?" she asked, her brain in a slight fog. His hand slowly crept down her side, inching to the hem of her dress, while the other one remained firmly planted at her back. _

"_Logan," she whispered as he pushed aside the material of her dress, inching closer towards her thigh._

_He paused when he reached it. "We're entering the point of no return here, Ace. Do you want me to stop or not?"_

_She gave it a couple of second's consideration. They _did_ need to get to the party. But she hadn't been with Logan since before he left for Palo Alto, and she could feel his arousal pressing against her. And his hands were so close to the spot she desperately wanted him to touch. She thought back to the way he'd been sneaking glances at her all day, a huge smile on his face. She'd smiled back each time she caught him, unable to remove the dopey grin from her face._

"_You _really_ don't play fair," Rory groaned, leaning into his touch. _

_Logan grinned against her. "Does that mean we can continue this little tryst?"_

"_Will you shut up and kiss me properly already."_

_And he did just that, lifting her up onto the bathroom counter. Rory's dress had risen around her waist and Logan stepped between her legs as she attempted to pull him closer to her. _

"_Bedroom," Rory mumbled, locking her legs firmly around his waist while her arms were wound around his neck. He lifted her off the counter, carrying her back into her bedroom blindly as Rory's tongue traced a pattern down his jaw. _

_The pill she had meant to take had been knocked onto the bathroom floor and sat there, forgotten._

"And then with everything that happened," Rory continued, "I guess I didn't realize that I never took the pill in the first place. It's all my fault." A tear rolled slowly down her cheek.

"How is this your fault?"

"Because maybe if I'd remembered I could have done something. I could have taken Plan B. I could have warned you that we needed to use a condom. I could have….prevented all this."

Logan frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, come on, Logan. We both know that after I said no and we broke up you never wanted to see me again. We were both supposed to live the lives we always wanted, and I ruined that for both of us. There are so many things I could have done to prevent exactly _this_ situation from happening, and I blew it."

"This isn't your fault, Rory! Ace, I didn't want to stop for a condom either, something we're _both_ usually careful to do. I'm just as responsible for this as you are. I don't want you to go around blaming yourself."

Logan left out the part that he _hadn't_ gotten what he'd wanted. What Logan wanted was to spend the rest of his life with Rory. Instead, he'd moved to California without her, and now he'd have to raise their child without ever being able to have a family with her. More than anything, he still wanted to be with her, and he didn't think that feeling would ever go away.

"Please, Ace. Don't beat yourself up about this. We both screwed up, okay? And there's nothing we can do to change that, so worrying about the sacrifices we both have to make isn't going to solve anything. Besides," Logan smirked halfheartedly. "We're going to be getting enough crap about this from our families. We can't be laying blame on each other too."

Rory smiled through her tears. "You're really not going to change your mind?"

"Not unless the baby somehow turns out to be Finn's, but since there's absolutely no chance of _that_ happening…"

Rory laughed, whipping her eyes. She couldn't even come up with a comeback.

"No, I'm not going to change my mind. I'll be here."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **Hopefully the next update won't take me nearly as long to finish. It will also be much longer than this was. It's all going to revolve around the wedding, which I haven't decided if I'm going to need to split into multiple chapters. And that's all the information I'm going to reveal about it for now.

Thank you all for your patience! You're all so great.


	9. Lies I Told My Grandparents

**A/N: **What do I do when I have two papers due in the morning? Stay up way too late finishing this update instead of writing one of those papers! I'm sure I'm going to regret this decision in the morning. So I hope you enjoy this long awaited next chapter, because I'm avoiding a large pile of school work to bring it to you!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Nine – Lies I Told My Grandparents<span>

"I just feel like he's rethinking everything."

Now that the immediate stress of the doctor's appointment was over, Rory was immediately thrown into the chaos of having only a few days in which to help plan her mother's wedding. A lot needed to be done, and it was Rory's job to organize it all. At the moment, she was out looking for a bridesmaids dress with Lane, who had dropped the twins at her mother's house in order to help Rory with her wedding duties.

"What makes you think that?" Lane asked, pulling a dress off the rack and presenting it to her. Rory made a face, scrunching up her nose in disapproval, and Lane carefully placed the dress back on the rack.

"It was just the way he was acting on the ride back. He barely said a word. And I _know_ he promised me that he wouldn't leave, but really, what's keeping him here?"

"Please tell me tour joking," Lane replied as she pushed aside a rather hideous group of dresses. "How about you! Or the baby?"

Rory scoffed. "Since when is that enough to keep someone around? It wasn't enough when my mom got pregnant. What makes this any different?"

"Well for one thing, your dad was only 16, and Logan's 25. Completely different situation."

"Yes, and when it happened to my parents, my dad was still in love with my mom. He hadn't moved on."

Lane rolled her eyes. "Rory, what are you talking about? Logan's crazy about you! The guy moved across the country, _for you_!"

In her heart, she hoped that Lane was right, but Rory's logical side was taking over. She wanted to believe that was the reason behind his move, but he'd made a point of talking about wanting to be there for the baby. Not her. "No, he moved across the country for the _baby_. I had nothing to do with it."

"And you really think he'd do that for just anyone?" Lane asked. "Think about it, Rory. If one of his other exes wound up pregnant, do you honestly think that Logan would drop everything, give up an amazing job and a life, _just_ to be near that kid? If he really wanted to be closer to the baby just for the sake of seeing his kid grow up, he could have gotten a job in New York or Boston."

"He moved to Connecticut because his new job was _located_ in Connecticut. Not because of me."

"That's beside the point!" Lane looked like she wanted to shake some sense into her friend. "Look, from everything you've told me, Logan was moving back to Connecticut whether or not his job took him here. Think about it, Rory. There's a much bigger market for him in some place like New York. Hell, there's a bigger market for _you _in New York! But you want the help of your family while you raise a kid _on your own, _so you moved back home. And Logan rearranged his entire life around that decision. He dropped everything and moved back to Connecticut. Guys like Logan don't do that for just anyone. He's still crazy about you! "

Rory shook her head. She wanted to believe it. She wanted to really believe that Logan wasn't going to bolt. Not an hour ago, she'd listened to him tell her just that. But she had too many conflicting thoughts and emotions making her think otherwise.

"Yeah, he's so crazy about me that when I wasn't ready to get married, he left me."

"Okay, do I really have to dignify that with a response?"

"I'm serious, Lane!" She stopped flipping through the dresses and turned to face Lane. "He's moved on. And now that the reality's starting to settle in, he's reevaluating his decision. It's only a matter of time before he leaves again."

Lane rolled her eyes, letting out an exasperated sigh. "Rory, my friend, you know I love you. But you're being ridiculous."

Maybe she was. Maybe she was completely misreading the situation, and maybe she was just unable to separate Logan now from her past experiences. But she didn't know how to turn the uncertainty off.

"I _know_," said Rory. "I know I sound crazy. I hear myself trying to rationalize Logan's actions and prepare myself for that moment he leaves, even though he's trying so hard to prove to me that he won't, and I don't know how to turn off that doubt. I just…" Rory sighed, her thought trailing off. "I miss him," she finished. "I barely had a chance to get over him." Maybe that was why she refused to believe that he'd stick around. It was easier for her to deal with not actually being with him by preparing for his possible departure. "We keep fighting, and I cry all the time. And I always feel like I'm on the verge of having a major freak out. I hate it. I hate the way  
>I feel."<p>

"You're pregnant, Rory. You've got a good nine months of feeling like this."

Rory turned away, pulling a dress off the rack and draping it over her arm.

"Look," Lane continued, although Rory was trying to ignore her. "I don't blame you for feeling this way, but you've got to relax a bit. You're spending way too much energy freaking out about Logan, and whether or not he still has feelings for you, and whether or not he'll stick around for the sake of your kid. You can't control any of those things, Rory! Stop worrying about what Logan's doing or thinking and start worrying about your baby."

So that's what Rory tried to do. It was easy for her to not dwell on Logan as she threw herself into wedding preparations. There was so much to do! She had to help Sookie plan the menu, work with Lane on the music, organize the decorating of the town square, rent the tables and chairs, pick out the flowers, and organize the guest list. She had more than enough to keep her distracted until the day of the wedding.

* * *

><p>"I look weird."<p>

"You look _great_, Mom!"

It was the morning of the wedding. The town square was packed with waiting guests as Rory and Sookie helped Lorelai put her dress on in Miss Patty's.

"I look like such a bride."

Sookie chuckled. "Well, sweetie, you are a bride."

"Do you think it was a mistake going with the perfect dress?"

The perfect dress, which Lorelai had picked out years earlier the first time she'd planned her wedding with Luke, had been sitting, untouched, in her closet ever since, as though it was waiting to be worn.

"Mom, the dress is _perfect_!"

"That's what I thought _last_ time, and it turned out to be cursed! Oh my god, what if the dress is still cursed? I've ruined the whole wedding by wearing a cursed dress!"

"You're right, you've ruined everything. I guess we're just going to have to do this wedding without you. I'm sure we can get Miss Patty to stand in for you."

"Hey, no mocking the bride. This morning I found you crying over a rerun of 7th Heaven. Which begs the question, 'what the hell were you doing watching a rerun of 7th Heaven?'"

Rory rolled her eyes. "Hey, don't mock the pregnant girl. I couldn't sleep and it was on TV."

There was a knock at the door.

"Give us five more minutes, Patty!" Rory yelled.

"It's not Patty."

It was a familiar male voice, one Rory hadn't heard in well over a year.

She frowned. "Jess?"

The door slide back as Jess stepped into the dance studio, shoving his hands deep into his pockets. "Hey," he said with a nod of his head.

She'd never seen him dressed up before. He was clean shaven, and his usually unruly hair looked as though he'd attempted to tame it. "You're wearing a suit," Rory commented with a frown. "And a _tie_! What happened, did you lose a bet?"

"Someone swiped my jeans at the laundry mat and replaced them with a suit. Imagine that," Jess joked.

"That's some laundry mat you're going to. Think I can exchange my old jeans for a new pair of Jimmy Choo's"

Jess rolled his eyes. "Hey, do you think we could talk real quick? Outside?" he said, pointing towards the door.

Rory hesitated. "Um. Yeah, I guess. Are you all set?" she asked, turning back to her mother.

"Yes, go," Lorelai insisted. "You've been running yourself ragged all week. Take a breather."

Rory hesitated a second time, and then followed Jess out the door. He led her around the studio and away from the town square. She was nervous. They hadn't been alone together since the awkward kiss in Philadelphia.

"So Luke filled me in on…everything," Jess finally admitted. His hands were back in his pockets, as though he didn't quite know what to do with them.

Rory felt her cheeks turning red. "Oh. _That_."

"Gotta say, not exactly what I expected when Luke called to tell me about the wedding."

She folded her arms across her chest. "Well, it was a bit of a shock to me too. And Logan."

"So what, are you and him…together? I thought you guys split up."

"We did," Rory confirmed. She wasn't sure why Jess was asking all these questions. "We're not together, we're just…trying to figure out how to deal with this. I mean…I'm pregnant. God, I still have trouble believing it sometimes." Rory stopped walking. "Why are we even talking about this?

Jess shrugged. "I just wanted to see how you were doing. And to clear the air a bit after our last meeting."

She remembered it well. How she'd driven down to Philadelphia to see him at his publisher's Open House. How she'd let him believe things were over between her and Logan. How she'd kissed him because she was mad at Logan, but she couldn't bring herself to go through with it.

"We were never really right together, were we?" Jess asked.

Rory shook her head. "No. The timing was always off. And…I think we worked better as friends. Don't you think we made better friends?"

"I think we did," he agreed. "That's kind of why I wanted to talk to you. I guess we're technically family now. So I wanted to make sure that we're still friends."

"Jess, of course! You didn't have to pull me aside just to ask that."

"That's not all," he said with a shake of his head. "I wanted to tell you that…I met someone."

"Oh!" Rory said in shock. She'd expected the news to sting, but it didn't hurt in the slightest. In fact, it filled her with a sense of relief. Finally, she could close the door completely on the romantic aspect of their relationship, knowing that they were both on the same page. He'd found someone who made him happy. "Good! Jess, I'm really happy for you. I want you to be happy. You know that, right?"

"I do," he responded. "Her name is Chloe. She's great, you'd really like her. She doesn't put up with any of my crap."

_Like I used to_, Rory thought. But she shook that thought from her head. It was a long time ago, and even if she had stood up for herself, Jess wouldn't have listened. He hadn't been willing to listen to anyone back then. "You didn't bring her with you?"

"No, I think it's a little too soon to put our relationship in jeopardy by introducing her to my mother."

Rory laughed. "Well, I can't wait to meet her."

Jess pulled his hands out of his pocket, running one of them through his hair. "So we're good?"

She smiled. "Of course."

* * *

><p>She couldn't lie to them anymore. The strain was too much for her.<p>

It was easy to pretend she wasn't pregnant for a little while. She could forget for a minute as she walked down the aisle, watched as her mother and Luke finally exchange wedding vow, and shed tears of joy as they were pronounced husband and wife to the raucous cheers of their guests. But then came the part after, where she needed to exchange the champagne flutes for the non alcoholic equivalent without anyone noticing. That took a bit of maneuvering. Luckily Sookie, the person whose pregnancy was public knowledge, was able to slip Rory her own glasses, dumping the contents of Rory's cup on the ground discreetly and running back to the bar for her own refill.

It was even harder when she had to talk to people. The whole town was hammering her with questions about her job. She didn't want to lie to them, but it was hard hold a conversation about work while conveniently leaving out the part about her not returning. She'd already managed to work in the fact that she'd been feeling 'under the weather' for weeks; she'd even 'let slip' to Miss Patty that she had a doctor's appointment the next day. All in all, she was playing her part as best she could.

But what she felt the worst about was lying to her grandparents.

She was standing next to her mother, with April standing by Luke's side, as the new family greeted guests who were offering their congratulations. Rory didn't know if it was something in the water, or if they really were happy to see their daughter married, but Richard and Emily politely came over to offer their best wishes to Lorelai, not a hint of insincerity in their voices.

"So Rory, when do you have to return to life as a campaign reporter?" Emily asked her granddaughter.

Rory glanced at her mother, unsure as to how to respond. She didn't want to outright lie, but she couldn't tell the truth here. Besides the fact that it wasn't the appropriate setting, this was her mother's day.

It was hard enough lying to her town, who had supported and encouraged her as she worked her way through Chilton and Yale. Who had sent her off to her first real job by throwing her a wild going away party in the rain. But her grandparents? They were the ones who had made it all possible. If there were two people whose pride from her achievements could rival even her mother's, it was Richard and Emily Gilmore. She couldn't lie to them, but she dreaded shattering the perfect vision they had of her.

"Well, I actually have some free time tomorrow evening. How about dinner?" Rory propositioned nervously. "It'll be just like old times; you, me, and mom."

Lorelai discreetly placed her hand on the small of Rory's back, trying to offer her an unseen touch of encouragement.

Richard frowned. "You don't have to go back right away?"

"No I…" Rory tried to swallow the lump in her throat, willing her voice not to crack. "I can do dinner tomorrow."

"Well that's _wonderful!_" Emily gushed. "But just the two of you? No Luke and April?"

April skillfully jumped in. "Actually, Dad already promised me that he'd take me out on the boat for a few days before I have to go back to Arizona. And since I won't really be around this summer like I thought, Dad _promised_ - "

"_Anyway_," said Lorelai, jumping in before April got too off track. "The point is they can't make it. So how about it, guys?"

Richard and Emily looked at each other quickly before returning their gaze to Rory and Lorelai.

"Tomorrow night sounds perfect," Richard responded.

"Great!" Rory said, trying to make her voice sound enthusiastic. All she felt was dread. "If you'll excuse me, I just have to make a quick phone call. Business stuff, you know?"

Without waiting for a response, Rory discreetly stepped away from the group, clutching he purse tightly to her chest. She headed away from the noise of the town square, trying to find some place for a little privacy.

Rory was happy for her mom, she really was. But there was something about weddings that constantly made her thoughts return to Logan. They had a rocky history with weddings. There was her grandparents vow renewal that had been the home of many firsts for them: the first time Rory expressed her jealousy at seeing him with another woman, their first dance, the first time they were openly honest with each other about their feelings for one another, their first kiss. There was his sister's wedding, which she hadn't even seen because she spent the whole time sitting frozen in the dressing room after finding out that Logan had slept with all of Honor's bridesmaids while they were apart. There was Lane's wedding, which he would have been at if they hadn't been so mad at each other that Logan had gallivanted off to Costa Rica. Despite the fact that she'd needed to rush to the hospital after receiving the phone call about his near death fall, the way her heart tightened in her chest in fear for his survival had cemented in her mind the way she felt about him in a way that nothing else ever could. And of course, there was the way their relationship had ended: with a proposal. There was nothing quite like a wedding to remind her of the way things could have been: the ring that could be on her finger if only she was ready for all that it entailed.

But she wasn't ready for that, and Logan wasn't willing to continue without it. In any case, Rory _had_ to be ready for her pregnancy to become public knowledge. That started with telling her grandparents.

Rory sat down on the steps of Miss Patty's with a sigh, pulling out her phone and dialing Logan's number.

"Hey, Ace," he said casually when he answered. "How's the wedding?"

"Good," she answered, her voice shaking slightly. "Still in cocktail hour, and mom's three glasses of champagne in. She'll be dancing on the tables in no time."

Logan chuckled. "Well, it's her wedding. She can be as drunk as she wants." Rory sensed a bit of hesitation in his voice. "Is that why you called? To tell me about the wedding? Not that I'm not happy you did, I just didn't expect to hear from you. Is everything alright?"

"No, I'm fine. It's just…" What was she supposed to say? That she just wanted to hear his voice? That she wanted reassurance from him that they would be okay? That she wished he was here with her, his arm wrapped firmly around her waist as he spun her around the dance floor? That she missed _them_? That she wished with all her heart that she had been able to just say yes so that she didn't have to face carrying his child without him?

But she couldn't say any of those things.

"Rory?" he said softly when she didn't finished her train of thought.

She sighed. "I'm going to tell them tomorrow. Richard and Emily. Tomorrow night at dinner."

"Oh," said Logan, his voice a little stiff.

"I'm sorry, I'm sure you're not ready to tell your parents yet. It's just…I can't lie to them. I have to do this."

She heard Logan sigh. "Are you sure?"

"Not at all. But it's not like I have a choice."

There was silence for a long time. "Do you want me to come with you?"

"No," Rory insisted. "It's better that you don't. Mom will be there for backup and moral support. But really, it's better that you're not there. It's going to be bad enough as it is."

"Oh yes, I'm sure the Gilmore's and the Hutzberger's will be having a field day." She heard Logan take another deep breath. "Okay. I guess I'll tell my parent's tomorrow too. Maybe I can get Honor to come as my backup."

"Strength in numbers is always good," Rory added lamely. "I'm sorry."

She heard Logan chuckle. "For what?"

"I dunno. I feel like I should be apologizing for something." She sighed again. "I should go. I guess I'll call you tomorrow after I talk to them." She hesitated for a moment, giving Logan a chance to respond. When he didn't, she hung up without saying goodbye, giving her no chance to say something she'd regret.

* * *

><p>Logan held his phone to his ear for a long time after Rory hung up on him. He wasn't exactly thrilled at the prospect of telling his parents that he'd knocked up his ex girlfriend. It had been humiliating enough listening to them berate him after news reached their ears of the failed proposal. He didn't really know how they'd react, or what he'd need to do to protect Rory from the inevitable fallout. Maybe if he knew what they'd say he could mentally prepare.<p>

What he did have to do was mentally prepare himself for pretending like he wasn't still completely in love with Rory Gilmore.

His heart had leapt into his throat when he saw her name flashing across the screen of his phone. But she'd been all business. Maybe that was the way their relationship was now. It was his own fault really. If he hadn't been so pig headed...but Logan was always like that. He'd dug his heels in the sand, convincing himself that it had to be all or nothing. Now they were stuck in this weird in between limbo. They couldn't talk about their relationship it turning into an argument, Logan couldn't act on his feelings for Rory, and he couldn't tell her that he'd take it all back if he could. She was simply there, and there wasn't anything he could do to change that. His only option was to pretend like he didn't still love her, pretend like he didn't regret pushing her away, pretend like it didn't kill him to think that they were having a baby but weren't together.

He knew she had her doubts about him; she had to. What with the less than stellar father figures in both their lives, it was no wonder that she was hesitant to trust him completely, especially coming right after he'd abandoned her after turning down his proposal. If she didn't want to get married before, she _certainly_ wouldn't want to after the way he treated her.

Logan sighed as he put his phone down on the nightstand, running his hands over his face. He'd gone to stay at his sister's in New York for a few days while the realtors get the papers in order for the apartment he planned on renting in Hartford. Logan leaned back on the guest bed, closing his eyes against the light.

"I take it that was Rory," said Honor, who was standing in the doorway.

Logan opened his eyes, but didn't sit up. "She's telling the Gilmore's tomorrow. You up for facing the Huntzberger warzone?"

Honor stepped across the threshold, taking a seat at the edge of the bed. "I'll bring the battle armor, you bring the grenades."

Logan didn't respond, instead choosing to close his eyes again. "I'm already mentally exhausted, and I haven't even told them yet."

Honor patted his knee sympathetically. "I'm sure. The strain of pretending you're not in love with Rory must be killing you."

Logan frowned, pushing himself into a sitting position. "Hey, I haven't said - "

"Not to me, no. But seriously, Logan, it's written all over your face. You might be able to fool her, and our parents, but you can't fool me."

He ran a hand through his hair. "There's nothing I can do about it. We agreed not to talk about us because when we do, we fight. So I can't tell her how I feel or what I've been thinking, and she's such an emotional mess right now that I don't think she'd even believe me if I told her." Despite himself, Logan laughed slightly. "The funny thing is, it doesn't even matter. Especially now that she's pregnant, I know what I want."

Honor gave him a puzzled look. "I'm sorry, but how does it not matter?"

"I mean when I left her because she couldn't say yes, I thought that I was leaving because I wanted to get married and she didn't. But that's not it at all. I want to be married to _her_. I want to be with _her_. I can look for a hundred years, and I won't find anyone else in the world that I care more about that that woman."

Honor smiled. "_That's_ the Logan I know and love. We Huntzberger's don't go down without a fight."

But Logan shook his head. "That's the old Logan. The old Logan would fight took and nail to get Rory back, whatever it takes. But that's not what she needs right now. She needs trust, and she needs patience. So that's what I'm going to do. If she doesn't believe that I'm always going to be here, then I'll wait for her to start believing."

"Logan," Honor said with a sigh. "Are you out of your freaking mind? You're just going to sit there waiting for this girl to come to her senses?"

Logan nodded.

"I'm sorry, but that's insane. You could be waiting for a very long time."

"I don't care," Logan said. "I'll wait as long as I have to. She told me once before that she just wasn't ready yet, and I didn't trust her enough to believe that she'd ever be. Now she doesn't trust me when I say that I'm not going anywhere. But I get it now. One day she'll be ready to get married, and one day she won't be so afraid that I'll bail on her."

Honor pushed herself off of the bed. "Well, little brother, for your sake, I hope you're right."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **I'm sure you wanted to see way more of the wedding than I showed here, but to be honest it wasn't really all that relevant to the story line. Which is probably why this chapter gave me so much trouble for a while. So instead you got to see Logan and Rory angsting, as well as some insight as to what happened to Jess. I always thought that they worked better as friends, and I thought that they'd both realize it given enough time. As for the Rory/Logan angst...well, that seems to be what they're good at. At least they're not arguing anymore! The next chapter, whenever I get a chance to actually work on it, will be the long awaited Gilmore/Huntzberger confrontation. It's gonna be quite the showdown!


	10. Don't Give a Damn Bout My Bad Reputation

**A/N: **Well it seems that having multiple papers to write/finals to study for makes me think that writing this would be a good idea. That, and I've been planning this confrontation for a long time, so now that I finally got to it, I was a little bit too excited to get it all written. Even though I should probably be working on other things. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Ten - I Don't Give a Damn 'Bout My Bad Reputation<span>

Rory had never looked at the front door of the Gilmore residence with more dread in her entire life.

There was one instance when her apprehension could _almost_ rival her current fear. It was the first Friday Night Dinner since she'd moved out of the Gilmore house during her brief time away from Yale, after her grandparents had learned that her father would now pay for her remaining semesters. That dinner had been the most emotionally exhausting three hours of her entire life. They'd yelled at each other, they'd laughed, they'd eaten dinner like nothing was wrong, and Rory sat silently as the argument had warped into something that wasn't even about her anymore.

But she had a feeling that tonight's dinner would trump even that.

"I can't do it," Rory stated matter-of-factly as she stood side by side with Lorelai, staring at the wooden door. She shook her head. "Nope. Can't do it."

Lorelai remained silent, which was unusual for her.

"I mean, do I _really_ even need to tell them?" Rory asked. "They'll figure it out eventually. Can't I just skip the actual telling part?"

"Because not telling them things has always worked out so well in the past."

"But what can they do _really?_" Rory asked, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. "Get mad? Gee, that's something new. They're already going to be mad. At least this way I won't have to _be there_ when they find out!"

"Quit stalling, babe" said Lorelai.

"Hey, I always let _you_ stall when you don't want to go in there! Let me be the kid for another couple of minutes!"

"What are you talking about; you _never _let me stall!"

"I so do!"

Lorelai turned to face her daughter. She was on the verge of asking a question that might be met with some resistance. "Okay, I'm gonna say something here, and I don't want you to get mad. But…are you _absolutely sure_ that you want to go through with this?"

Rory frowned. "Telling Grandma and Grandpa? Absolutely not, that's what I've been saying!"

"No, not that. I mean the pregnancy. Because Rory, if you _really_ don't want to do this, there are options."

"What!" Rory exclaimed, completely flabbergasted at the direction the conversation had taken. "Mom! How can you even suggest that?"

"Hey, I'm sorry!" Lorelai said, raising her hands slightly in surrender. "I just needed to check before you go through with telling the grandparents. Look, I know how stressful this has been on you, and that your biggest worry has been the career you're giving up. And if you really don't want to go through with this, you don't have to. You don't have to be pregnant if you don't want to be."

But Rory shook her head, unwilling to even entertain the thought. "I can't do that! No. The only thing worse than this whole mess would be…doing what you're suggesting. _No._ Absolutely not."

Lorelai smiled sadly at Rory. _Like mother like daughter_, she thought. Lorelai hadn't even considered an abortion when she found out she was pregnant. Not that she would have been able to easily walk into an abortion clinic at the time, like Rory could if that was the route she had chosen. Instead of responding, Lorelai quickly leaned over and rang the doorbell, giving Rory no time to protest.

She glared at her mother. "Mean!"

Lorelai grabbed Rory's hand, squeezing it quickly. "It'll be fine, babe. And I'll be right here to back you up."

Rory sighed as her mother dropped her hand, glancing down at her stomach. _Here goes nothing, little guy, _she thought as the door was pulled opened.

A smiling Emily greeted them at the door. "They're here!" she called out. "Richard, they're here!"

"Yes, I heard the doorbell, Emily!" Richard called from living room.

"Hi, mom." Lorelai stepped across the threshold, Rory following behind her.

"Hello, grandma!" said Rory a little too enthusiastically. Lorelai spun around to look at her, trying to signal through subtle eye gestures alone that Rory needed to calm down. She bit her lip as she gave her grandmother a hug, trying to will her pounding heart to stop beating so loudly. Surely it could be heard by everyone in the room.

"Well, come in, girls! Don't just stand there!" Rory tuned her grandmother out as she followed Emily into the living room, hugged her grandfather, and sat down on the couch next to Lorelai. She was too busy concentrating on her breathing to pay attention. In. Out. In. Out. It wasn't until Richard was handing her a club soda that she realize she was being addressed.

"I'm sorry, what?" She asked, smiling politely to cover up the fact that she hadn't been paying any attention.

"I said, how's life on the road?" Richard asked as he sat down across from her. "I'm sure you find it invigorating."

"Oh!" How was she supposed to respond without lying? "Yes, it's been very exciting. A little exhausting, but the experience has been great."

She didn't know how to continue.

"Well, come on. Tell us everything!" Emily gushed. "Did you get to meet Senator Obama? I have to say, I don't think he'll get the nomination. Not enough experience, and I don't care for his politics. Not that I hope he _doesn't_ get the nomination, of course, because I hope you can follow him all the way to the election next November. I'm sure you must be so busy following him all over the country. How did you get time off, anyway? Do you have to go back soon?"

Rory remained frozen. She'd never seen Emily talk so quickly before; she could almost rival Lorelai. Her enthusiasm at having her granddaughter home for the moment was putting her in overdrive. Rory hated that she was about to burst that bubble.

She took a deep breath, glancing at the drink she was holding in her lap. "Well, that's the thing," she finally said. "I'm…I'm not going back to the campaign."

She looked up at the sound of Emily's laughter. "Oh, Rory, you and your little jokes! You get that from your other."

"I'm not joking, grandma. I'm not going back."

Emily frowned. "Well, why on earth not? Is this your mother's doing? Did she convince you to quit your job so you'd be closer to her? Honestly, Lorelai, what could you possibly be thinking? That job is perfect for her!"

"This has nothing to do with mom," Rory said. "And while yes, the job is perfect for me, and I'm sad that I won't get the opportunity to finish my run there, the circumstances have changed, and it's no longer feasible for me to take that job."

She was beating around the bush, trying as hard as possible to stall.

"But I don't understand," said Richard. "If you love this job so much, why would you leave it?"

She looked down at her hands again, placing the glass she was holding on the coffee table. Lorelai reached over and took hold of one of Rory's hand, squeezing it comfortingly.

She took a deep breath.

"Because I'm pregnant."

* * *

><p>Logan didn't think he'd ever seen his childhood look less welcoming.<p>

He was sitting in the living room with his sister, mother, grandfather, and surprisingly his father. Honor had so far successfully managed to keep the conversation off of Logan's sudden appearance back on the East Coast after nearly two months of living in California, filling the room with polite chit chat and small talk. She'd never been more thankful to have his sister on his side in his entire life.

But she couldn't keep their parents away from focusing on him forever.

"So Logan, I hear you stole a company out from under me," Mitchum finally said bluntly. Logan couldn't tell if his father was more angry or proud of him.

"Yeah and believe it or not, I didn't even know about it until we were signing the papers. But it's a big step for us; we're very excited about the merge."

Mitchum downed his drink quickly. "So I'm assuming that's what brings you back home. You're overseeing the merge?"

"Sort of. I'm heading the new office."

His father frowned. "I'm surprised your partners would send you back east after such a short time in California. West Coast not working out for you?"

"No, California's been great for the most part. I volunteered for the location change."

They didn't press him for answers. He didn't expect them to. Like all Huntzberger family gatherings, his parents knew that the bad news was coming. They were going to drag out of him as painfully as possible.

"Mom. Dad. Grandpa. I know that you haven't always respected the choices I've made. Actually, I take that back. You've _never_ respected my choices. So before I tell you what I'm about to say, I want you to keep in mind the fact that I'm an adult, and whatever you think or say won't change anything. I don't expect your support, but I hope that you can accept what I'm going to tell you and move on. Your opinions and your feelings won't change anything, so please don't try."

When he finished his speech, Logan was greeted by silence. Silence, and the sound of ice clinking against his grandfather's empty glass as swirled the cubes around. He was reminded of a time years ago, when he'd first brought Rory home to meet his family. That hadn't gone well either.

"Oh Logan, that's nonsense!" Shira finally said with a fake laugh. "What in the world can we possibly do to influence your choices?"

"She's right son. You've never given a damn about our opinion. Why should now be any different?"

That wasn't true. Logan cared far too much about what his parents thought of him. That was the whole problem; forcing himself to stop caring. He had to figure out very early, when he was still young, that it was better if he didn't care at all. It would have been so much easier if Logan never cared to begin with.

"Because this is different."

"Damnit, Logan!" Mitchum said, his voice rising slightly. "Stop beating around the bush and tell your mother and I whatever it is you're trying to say."

"Right." Logan glanced down at his scotch and drained the full glass quickly. "The real reason I decided to move back to Connecticut is because Rory reached out to me a few weeks ago. She's pregnant."

* * *

><p>Rory's declaration was met with stunned silence.<p>

"You're joking," Emily insisted. "You're not _pregnant_. This is one of your mother's sick jokes. Honestly, Lorelai, I expected this sort of behavior from you, but from Rory?"

"Mom, I didn't put her up to this, and she's not lying." Lorelai's voice was calm, and that comforted Rory.

"I'm really sorry, Grandma," Rory mumbled. She felt like a child again, upset that she'd forgotten to return a library book on time.

But Emily ignored Rory, instead choosing to glare at Lorelai. "This is all _your _fault," Emily accused, her voice growing harsher by the second.

Lorelai scoffed. "I'm sorry, did I impregnate my daughter? Last time I checked, I lacked the proper anatomy to do that. Also, I'm not really into incest."

"Well _obviously_ she picked up your loose morals from you! Where else would they come from?"

"Excuse me!" Rory interjected.

But Emily wasn't finished. "You're her mother, Lorelai! You're supposed to set an example!"

"I'm twenty two years old, Grandma! I'm not twelve!"

There was no stopping Emily once she was on a roll. "You run around doing whatever you want. You have these wild flings with men, providing no stable father figure for your daughter -"

Lorelai let out a groan of frustration. "For the last time, we didn't want to get married!"

"- so of _course_ she makes the same mistakes as you! You never provided her with the proper discipline!"

"It's like I'm a broken record," Lorelai said as she rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "Seriously, I don't even know why I bother."

"Grandma, this has nothing to do with mom," said Rory, trying to keep her emotions under control. "She did a great job raising me. This is about me."

"Of course this is about your mother!" Emily snapped. "Who else would teach you that it's proper behavior to run around wildly having _illicit relations_ with men?"

"Illicit relations?" She was having trouble staying calm. The implication that her relationship with Logan was wrong in any way angered her. "It's not like I've been running around having tons of unprotected sex with random men. I was in a committed relationship for almost three years! We lived together! What did you think we were doing, having a tea party?" Rory didn't know how she managed to keep herself from yelling the last part.

"This shouldn't have happened in the first place!" cried Emily. "Honestly, Lorelai. How could you let this happen?"

"And once again, it's somehow my fault," Lorelai murmered.

"This isn't mom's fault, Grandma. It's mine and Logan's. Honestly, we did everything possible to prevent this. But accidents happen."

"If you _really _did everything to prevent this, it wouldn't have happened in the first place! Your mother should have set a better example. She made you think that it's acceptable behavior to get pregnant and throw away everything you've worked for. You're going to do _exactly _what she did. You'll take a job that's beneath you, throwing away your entire career, and you'll refuse to even get married."

"Oh my god, I was sixteen!" Lorelai yelled. "I did what I had to do to take care of my daughter _on my own_ like I wanted. If I could figure out how to provide for my kid at sixteen, Rory's more than capable of doing to at twenty two, _with a college degree_!"

"It's not proper! When you get pregnant you get married, that's how it works! But not for you, you have to do everything on your own. Won't accept help from anyone. Not even from a husband! And _that's_ what you're lifestyle has taught your daughter. She doesn't understand that when you get pregnant, you get married."

"I don't want to get married. Logan and I are not _going_ to get married just because I'm pregnant!" It was almost painful to admit. Not because she wanted to get married, but because she was also admitting that her and Logan would _never_ get married.

"Oh, yes you are!" Emily yelled. "He's a Hutzberger, Rory. That's how things work in this world."

"Grandma, I'm an adult. You can't tell me what to do."

"When you get pregnant, you get married. That's the way it works!"

"And in case you forgot, Logan already asked me to marry him before I even knew I was pregnant. And when I said no, he dumped me. I wasn't ready to get married two months ago; what makes you think I'd suddenly be ready now?"

"A child needs a mother _and_a father, that's the way it works!"

"Okay first of all, I grew up just fine without Dad. And second of all, my child _will_ have a father. Logan and I are going to work this out on our own. _You're _not going to dictate what we do, because this decision isn't yours to make. It's mine."

"Don't you raise your voice at me!" Emily shouted.

"Well what do you expect, mom, after the way you're treating her," Lorelai said. "And me. God, you're doing to Rory _exactly_ what you did to me. You're trying to punish her for screwing up and _make_ her do things the way you think they should work. But what works for you doesn't always work for the rest of us. All you're going to do is push her away, just like you pushed me away."

"Look, Grandma," Rory continued, trying once again to get herself under control. "I'm _sorry_ that I've disappointed you. I screwed up, I know I did. And I want you to be involved, but not if you're going to treat me like some stupid little kid incapable of deciding anything for herself."

"Well you've _clearly_ demonstrated by your actions that you're not mature enough to be a mother. Otherwise you wouldn't have let this happen in the first place!"

"Oh, for the love of god!" Lorelai yelled.

"For the last time!" Rory yelled back. "It was an accident, okay? I was on birth control and everything! But one day I accidentally forgot to take it, and poof! Now I'm pregnant. It's not like I thought, 'gee, you know what would be fun? If I got pregnant right as I'm about to graduate college and break up with my boyfriend!' It happens!"

"No!" Emily insisted. "This doesn't _just happen_."

"You know what, Grandma? It does. It _does _just happen! You know, I expected you to be mad, and I expected you to be disappointed, but I didn't think that you'd blame mom and treat me like I'm still twelve. I was really hoping you'd try to be just a little sympathetic, considering all the sacrifices that I'm willingly making for this, but what was I thinking? I'd heard all the stories about what mom went through when she got pregnant. Silly me for thinking that you'd act any differently."

"Young lady, how _dare_ you speak to me like that!"

But Rory wasn't done yet. "I mean, I didn't exactly expect you to be _happy_, but I was hoping that you'd at least be a little nicer to me, once the anger wore off. Isn't this what you always wanted? You were picturing the little Logan and Rory babies running around ever since I brought him to dinner. It's not enough for you that we _broke up _and I'm still hurting from that, or that I'm giving up an amazing job so that I can be in one place and raise a baby. No, you have to punish me even more and make me feel like crap about this. Are you happy? Do you want t rub some more salt in the wounds? God, I don't know why I even brought the ultrasound picture to show you." Angrily, Rory shoved her hand into her purse, grabbing the print out images, and throwing them across the table at her grandmother. "Here. I'm about eight weeks. Happy?"

It was then that Rory realized that her grandfather hadn't said a word throughout the entire argument. The sound of a slamming door suddenly made her look wildly around the living room, searching for Richard. She hadn't even noticed his absence.

"Where's Grandpa?" Rory asked Lorelai.

She too spun around wildly. Then, suddenly, her eyes widened in horror. "Oh no," she said.

"What?" Rory asked.

"Oh _no_!"

"Mom, what is it?"

"Grab your purse, hun, we've gotta go."

Rory frowned as her mother ran from the room. "Go where?" she called after Lorelai. She hadn't left her seat on the couch, and Emily was staring after Lorelai with an equally flabbergasted look on her face.

"To stop your grandfather from killing the father of your unborn child!"

* * *

><p>There was no explosion of anger. No yelling. No real response to Logan's declaration. Finally, after a minute of silence, Mitchum folded his arms across his chest.<p>

"How much?" he asked.

Logan frowned. "I'm sorry, I'm not following."

"How much will it take to make this go away?"

Logan stared at his father blankly, completely confused by the question. "What?"

Shira jumped out of her seat. "I'll be right back!" she exclaimed in a high pitched voice, scurrying quickly from the room. As Logan watched his mother go, he caught Honor rolling her eyes at Shira's retreating back. It was typical behavior of their mother. When confronted with an awkward situation, the cigarettes always came out.

"Please tell me that I'm somehow misunderstanding you," Logan continued. "It's sounds to me like you're asking me how much money it will take for Rory to _not be pregnant_."

"No, I'm asking you how much money it will take to keep you from being connected to it."

Logan laughed. It was an unnatural response, but he didn't know how else to react. "I don't believe this," he murmured. "Are you _seriously_ trying to buy off Rory?"

"Everyone has a price, son."

"Rory doesn't!" Logan yelled. "First of all, there's no amount of money in the world that she would accept to get her to do what it is you're suggesting. Second, there's no amount of money that could keep _me_ from being at all connected to this. I'm not _you_, Dad. I can't _believe_ you're seriously asking me to deny paternity. To my _own kid_!"

"This kind of thing can ruin your reputation, Logan! Did you ever think about that when you were busy gallivanting around with your little playmates?"

"Whoa, Dad! Crossing the line," said Honor, trying to play the role of peace keeper.

"I don't give a damn about my reputation!" Logan shouted, jumping out of his seat in anger. "And Rory was my _girlfriend_. Jesus, I wanted to _marry _her! Not that you and mom would have supported _that_ either! You never liked Rory, even from the beginning."

"Don't you put that on me, son. That was your mother - "

"No, Dad. It was _you_. You should _never_ have treated Rory like that at the internship. She was my _girlfriend_, and you made her feel inadequate. And then you'd try to use her to manipulate me. What kind of person does that?"

"Hey, I treated her just like I'd treat anyone else."

"That's not how people do things! You don't make them feel small and unwelcome. And if you even _think_ about trying to buy Rory off, that's exactly what you'll be doing. But not to her. You'd be telling _your grandchild_ that it's not welcome because you don't like the circumstances around how it got here. Well guess what, Dad. You can't control me, Rory, or the decisions _we_ make regarding _our kid_!"

At that moment, an angry Richard Gilmore stormed into the living room. Logan hadn't even heard the doorbell ring.

"How _dare_ you do this to my granddauther!" Richard yelled, spit flying everywhere as he overemphasized every syllable.

Although he was still angry at his father, Logan tried to get himself under control. "Look, Richard - "

"_That girl_ has more talent and motivation in her right hand than you do in your entire body, and you've _ruined_ it for her by getting her pregnant!"

"Richard, I'm sorry that - "

"If you know what's good for you, you'll stay the hell away from my family!"

"I can't do that, Richard. You can't ask me to stay away from my kid. Because I won't."

"Don't you think you've caused her enough damage? I don't want you coming anywhere near her!"

Logan was about to reply, but was saved the trouble when Mitchum jumped in. "What about the damage _she's_ done? Your granddaughter is going to ruin my son's reputation!"

Richard's fury was then turned on Mitchum. "Don't you talk about my granddaughter like that! Logan's lucky she ever even _looked_ at him, considering his reputation prior to their courtship. And after the way your family has treated her, you're lucky I didn't make this demand sooner."

"Grandpa, what are you doing here?"

Again, Logan must have missed the sound of the doorbell ringing. A slightly pale Rory hurried into the room, followed closely by Lorelai.

"I'm giving this _scoundrel_ a piece of my mind, _that's_ what I'm doing. I'm not going to let him or anyone related to him anywhere _near_ my family ever again."

"But that's not your decision to make," she said. Logan was surprised at the level of calm in her voice. Judging by her red eyes and puffy eyes, it looked as though she'd been crying. If only her eyes didn't look even more beautiful when she was crying.

Her presence calmed him a little, giving him a chance to gather his thoughts.

Rory stood at Logan's side, trying to show some solidarity. "Look, I know you're upset right now, and there's nothing that I can really do about that. But Logan and I are going to decide how we want to handle this situation _on our own_. And if you don't like that, then I can't be held responsible for the decisions I make regarding your involvement in the baby's life. Okay?"

But neither Richard nor Mitchum were paying any attention. "They're going to get married. We can do it before Rory starts showing."

Mitchum laughed. "You really think my son would marry her _now_? If they got married now, she'd _insist_ on having some kind of crazy, iron clad prenup that leaves Logan paying millions of dollars in child support if he even _thinks_ about leaving her. You're crazy if you think I'm letting your granddaughter's screw ups get anywhere near my son's inheritance!"

Rory looked like she wanted to jump in and say something, but at the touch of Logan's hand on her arm, she stopped. He jerked his head towards the door silently and Rory nodded. As quietly as they could, Rory and Logan scurried out of the war zone, followed just as quietly by Honor and Lorelai.

"Ladies and gentleman, I give you the fight of the century," said Lorelai sarcastically once they were safely outside.

"I wonder how many rounds they're going to go," Rory commented, although there was no feeling in her tone.

"You know what really astounds me?" said Honor in an offhand sort of way. "What _really_ astounds me is the fact they seem to think that what they say will in any way effect what these two decide to do."

"It comes with the territory," Lorelai replied. "Moneyed people seem to think that they have power over everyone, _including_ other moneyed people. I'm Lorelai, by the way." She extended her hand to the blonde woman.

"Honor. It's good to finally meet you."

"Likewise. I guess we're the only two supportive people in either camp."

"Not so. I've managed to bring Rory's dad around, and her stepdad. It's a small team, but at least it's something."

Logan, who had been ignoring the exchange between his sister and Lorelai, turned to face Rory, touching her arm lightly. "You okay?" he asked.

Rory shrugged. "They just…they said so many hurtful things. Grandma. Grandpa. Your dad."

"You know I don't care what they think or say, right?" Logan asked her. Their opinion won't change anything."

"I know," Rory said with a sigh. "I was just hoping that…I don't know what I was hoping." She took a deep breath. "Do you think we could just…talk for a little while? Just you and me?"

Logan glanced at Honor. He'd _love_ to just stay and talk to Rory, but he'd driven down with his sister. She was going to stay for a few days in his new apartment in Hartford, helping him to get resettled. He didn't want to just abandon her.

"You two go," Honor insisted. "Lorelai can drop me off. Right Lorelai?"

"Of course," she agreed, filling Logan with a sense of relief.

"Thanks, sis," Logan whispered to his sister as she hugged him goodbye.

"Any time, little brother," Honor responded. As she pulled back, she smiled sadly at him. "It'll be okay. Don't worry."

* * *

><p>"Do you want to get something to eat?" Logan asked hesitantly. "I don't know about you, but I never made it to the meal portion of the evening. I could use some sustenance."<p>

"Chinese?" Rory suggested. "The baby really wants some kung pao chicken."

Logan grinned. "You're going to use that excuse whenever you want a specific food item, aren't you?"

"Hey, being pregnant has to have _some_ perks. I might as well milk it for all it's worth."

Logan laughed. This is what he missed the most. The casual banter and the light teasing. Of course, the second he realized that he missed it, the moment was gone, replaced by the awkwardness that was their breakup. Silence filled the car again, leaving Logan's thoughts to wander back to better times.

Rory leaned her head against the window, closing her eyes. Tears rolled silently down her cheeks. As Logan caught a glance of her tear stained face, he reached a hand across the consol and placed it on her leg. It was no use asking her what was wrong, because he knew that was wrong. Their family was wrong. _They_ were wrong.

Rory sighed at his touch. For a minute, she could forget that they were broken up and that she was pregnant, and that they'd just gotten into huge fights with their families. She pretended like his touch was more than just a gesture meant to make her feel better. She thought about other places his hand had been: tangled in her hair, caressing her lower back, slowly moving its way up her thigh and towards her -

She stiffened, sitting bolted upright, and pulling her thoughts back into the present. What was she doing thinking about _that_?

Logan's hand had dropped away at her sudden movement. "You okay, Ace?"

"Fine," she replied, her voice cracking slightly. He glanced at her as he pulled into the parking lot of a Chinese restaurant, concerned.

Rory swallowed the lump in her throat. Her face was a little flushed. She felt like some silly teenager, unable to control her hormones. "Really, I'm fine," she insisted.

What was the matter with her? Why couldn't she get these images out of her head? Her mind flashed with images of her and Logan together, and what it had felt like to have his hands slowly make their way underneath the edge of her shirt, pulling it over her head and discarding it on the floor. Where had these thoughts come from? What prompted them?

Finally, when they were seated at a table, Rory took a long gulp of her water, trying to calm her hormones. _Stop that_, she told herself. _You can't be thinking like that anymore_.

"Why don't I start," Logan finally said after they placed their order. Rory nodded politely, waiting for him to continue.

"Look. I know you overheard my dad say some pretty hurtful things. And I want you to know that I don't for one second think that you'd use me like that, or that you in any way orchestrated this whole situation."

"I know that," said Rory quietly. "And I don't care what my grandpa says; I don't want you to stay away. I'm _really happy_ that you decided to be here, Logan. Not just for the baby, but for me as well. You're support really means a lot to me. And I know that things ended badly between us, but - "

Logan cut her off, shaking his head. Part of him really wanted to tell her that he was still in love with her, but the other part knew that it was a bad idea. For starters, they were both still a little emotional from the confrontation with their families. But for another, he needed a break from talking about _them_ so he could clear his head. "Look. It's still all a little fresh. And there's a lot of things that I want to say to you, but I'm still not ready to talk about it, okay?"

Rory nodded her understanding. She wasn't really ready to talk to him about it either, to be quite truthful.

"But I _do_ think that we need to talk some business regarding the baby. I think that we can _both_ agree that's more important than hashing out all our issues. Agreed?"

"Agreed."

"Now, I know you don't want to accept child support money, but I think we should still come to some sort of monetary agreement. I'm assuming that you're going to want to split all expenses fifty-fifty."

"You really don't have to do that, Logan. I can take care of it myself."

"I know you can, but I don't agree. If you really want to do joint custody, you have to allow me to take on some of the financial burden. Now, I will completely stick to an even arrangement, my only stipulation being that when it comes to education, you let me take care of it. I know that you won't really have the money for fancy private schools and Ivy League colleges on your own, so I don't want you to worry about that. I can afford to set up those funds, so let me do that."

Rory couldn't see any reason to disagree with him. When the time came, her dad would have been more than willing to pay for those sorts of things. But that kind of arrangement would have reminded her too much of the deal she'd had with Richard and Emily in order to pay for Chilton and Yale. And that did _not_ appeal to her.

"I'll accept your terms, but that means buying other expensive things that I can't afford either. I have full veto power over all purchases. Agreed?"

Logan nodded. "Now, as far as custody goes, I think we should do something like every other weekend, plus one or two other days during the week, as well as alternating holidays. We can come up with the exact details later, but does that sound sufficient?"

"I can accept that."

"Good. Now, here's my last thing. I want you to _promise_ me that having a baby won't stop you from taking jobs that could keep you travelling for long periods of time."

Rory frowned. "Logan, you know I can't - "

"I'm not backing down on this one, Ace." His face looked completely serious. "I'm not going to let you give up your dreams. I understand that you need to be close to home now, but when the baby gets older it will be okay if you have to go away to cover a story every once in a while. I won't let you turn down something that you've wanted for so long because of the baby."

She studied his face carefully. "Logan - "

"Don't argue with me, Rory. Part of the reason I moved here is to make sure that you don't put your entire life on hold for the next eighteen years.

Now more than ever Rory wished that the chasm that had been between them ever since the proposal wasn't there. _This_ is the sort of thing she had been worried about when deciding whether or not to accept Logan's proposal. She'd been worried that, by getting married right away, she would turn down some amazing jobs so that she could be closer to him. And she would have, too. Logan had proposed so that she'd come out to California with him, meaning that she would have turned down Hugo's job offer following the Obama campaign. Because she wouldn't have been able to leave Logan for an unknown amount of time if they were engaged.

She knew that she'd made the right decision in turning him down, at least at the time. It wouldn't have been right to put her career on hold right when they would have been getting engaged; she would have ended up resenting him for it. She only wished Logan had understood that at the time.

Doing so because of a baby, however, was a completely different story.

"Promise me, Rory," Logan insisted.

Rory sighed. "I can't guarantee that I'll take _every_ extended business trip that comes my way. But alright, I won't put my career on hold for eighteen years. And thank you for wanting to push me, even after…well, thanks."

Logan cracked a smile. "I'll always be there to push you, Ace. I promise."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **So here's the thing. I know that all of you lovely readers have been bugging me for a while now to just let Rory and Logan get back together already. And while I would LOVE to fulfill that request, there's not really much I can do on that front. Of course, they'll sort out their issues eventually. But I can't really change WHEN that happens. What I CAN do, however, is try to speed up the timeline a bit to get to that point faster. That's the best I can do.


	11. Move Along

**A/N:** I have a final tomorrow, so what do I do instead of studying? Finish writing this chapter. And, surprisingly, I really love how this chapter turned out. As promised, I managed to speed up the timeline a little bit. Rory goes from being eight weeks pregnant at the beginning of the chapter to twelve weeks by the end. And don't worry, I didn't cut out anything essential in order to get there.

Anyway. Enjoy! And good luck to everyone who's suffering through finals like I am.

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Eleven - Move Along<span>

"Can I ask you something?"

Truth be told, Honor didn't feel that it was right to intrude. Logan's relationship really wasn't any of her business, no matter what she thought about him. Normally, Honor wouldn't get involved. But this was different. Logan was shooting himself in the food with this Rory situation. Maybe if she just had some more information, she could figure out how to give him the right push - the push he needed to fix things with Rory rather than waiting for them to fix themselves.

This wasn't like him. He wasn't the sit back and wait sort of guy. And Honor couldn't for the life of her figure out why he was being so cautious. There was something that Logan wasn't telling her; some reason that he was holding back when he should be charging forward.

"I know what you're thinking," said Lorelai. "I'm not going to conspire with you about my daughter and Logan. Not going to happen."

"But don't you think this is crazy?" Honor asked. "I mean, they're clearly still nuts about each other. At least Logan still is, anyway. This whole thing is just so _stupid_!"

Lorelai shook her head. "I can't answer that for you. Look, if they want to work things out, they'll work things out. _On their own_."

Honor sighed. She recognized a losing battle when she saw one. "I'm sorry, you're right," she said. "It's just, Logan's been so cautious and hesitant ever since Rory told him she's pregnant. That's not like him. I thought that maybe it had something to do with Rory, and if I could just figure out what it was…" She let her voice trail off, silence filling the car.

"She doesn't say much," Lorelai finally said. "I know that she regrets saying no, but at the same time she couldn't have said yes. And I also think that she's more hurt than she's letting on that Logan wouldn't wait for her."

Honor frowned, not quite following. "What do you mean?"

"Rory asked him to wait. She said that her life was just opening up, and that she wasn't ready to decide everything right away. She wanted time. She asked him if they could do long distance while she figured the rest of her life out. Logan said that it was now or never."

Suddenly, Logan's hesitation made perfect sense. He was waiting because Rory had once asked him to, and he'd screwed up by denying her that. It would probably be his hardest challenge, learning to be patient. But he'd made that mess in the first place.

"What are you _doing_ to yourself, Logan?" Honor muttered with a sigh.

"Does that answer your question?"

"He's an idiot. But yes, everything makes a lot more sense now."

"Look," Lorelai continued. Rory has a lot of things she needs to work through emotionally. And being pregnant isn't helping her to do that. Just be patient and let them figure it out on their own. There's nothing we can do."

* * *

><p>Rory felt a sense of calm wash over her after she had the chance to talk to Logan following the disastrous 'dinner.' But then again, he'd always had the ability to ease her worries during times of heightened emotions. When she was stressed or something was troubling her, Logan always had a knack for simply being able to make it all go away. After nearly two months apart, during which time most of her greatest worries revolved around him, Rory had almost forgotten what it was like not only to have him calm her, but to allow it to happen.<p>

She hadn't even realized exactly how on edge she was until he was dropping her back at home, and the sadness of his departure lingered. But of _course_ her stress levels were high; it was to be expected. Her pregnancy hormones were holding a circus in her body, making it nearly impossible for Rory to think about things rationally. And until Logan had brought up the technicalities of joint custody, (something that normally, Rory would have been on top of immediately) she hadn't realized exactly how much she needed him to balance that out for her. Rory, normally so logical that she'd get in the way of her own heart if she had a good enough reason, had never met anyone who could calm her down when she was in an emotional uproar the way Logan could. Even her own mother couldn't do it justice. She needed that; she needed the stability that only Logan could give her.

And what stung the most was knowing that she couldn't just take comfort in him the way she used to. She'd never needed him more, and she'd never had him less. He wasn't hers anymore, and she had no one to blame but herself.

Even so, he was still there for her completely. Just like before, when they were still together, Logan was making every effort to be one step ahead of her, thinking everything through before she even had the chance to do so herself. It was one of the many things that had changed about him over the course of their relationship. Whereas before he'd just jump in without looking, thinking that the details of a problem could be figured out later, now Logan tried to examine things from multiple angles, making it almost unnecessary for Rory to do so herself.

She was grateful, actually, that he'd planned out exactly how to handle joint custody, thinking of all the little details without her even needing to say a word. With Logan's suggestions, she came to the realization that she'd been avoiding thinking about the actual technicalities of it. If she was really being honest with herself, Rory would have to admit that she was avoiding it on purpose. Because what really scared her the most wasn't being a parent, but being a _single_ parent.

In a way it would have been easier for her if had Logan never gotten his act together, instead choosing to stay away from her. At least then she could come to terms with their break up for good. But now, Rory didn't think she'd ever be able to, not really. He was doing everything right, and it made her feel happy and sad at the same time. Happy because it took some of the burden off her shoulders, but also sad because of the constant reminder that, despite it all, despite all he was doing now, he hadn't been willing to wait for her.

She couldn't bear the thought of having him right there, but not in her life fully. If only she'd been ready. If only Logan had been willing to see things from her perspective. Now he would always be there, just out of her reach. What happens when he finds someone who's ready for all that Logan is looking for: the ultimate commitment? She didn't think she'd be able to handle seeing him marry someone else and having children with someone else, not when she already had his child.

But what exactly was she supposed to do? She wasn't ready to get married. Logically, she knew that she _should_ be. She loved Logan, and she did want to be with him. They were old enough to make this commitment; Lane was married with children already, and her grandparents had gotten married when they were her age. Logan had an excellent job and plenty of money in his trust fund, despite the millions he'd lost in the deal that went bad when he quit his father's company. Add in the trust fund Rory was sure to inherit from her grandparents when she turned 25 and they were more than financially stable. And the baby, logically, _should_ have made things simpler rather than more complicated.

All those factors _should_ have lined up to marriage, but they didn't. Especially after the breakup, they still had a few issues to work out, that much was obvious. Isn't that what they should be doing now? Shouldn't they _want_ to work out their problems? Rory knew that she wanted to talk about everything that went wrong with Logan, but they never did. They'd fight, or Logan would brush it off, easily avoiding the subject. So instead of talking about whatever problems they were having, they were discussing joint custody agreements, dancing around the real issue: why each one was upset about how things went wrong. Maybe that was fine for now - at least they were back to getting along. But how long could Rory go without explaining to Logan exactly _why_ she still couldn't marry him. She'd touched on it during one of their fights, but she needed him to understand.

Because, despite every reason she now had sitting in the pro column telling her to run to him, right now, and beg him to forgive her for saying no, there were still far too many cons outweighing them. The biggest one being that he hadn't been willing to wait for her. After everything they'd been through, all the patience she had for him, he hadn't been able to understand when she needed him to. When she had been so sure that they were on the same page, Logan had decided to jump ahead to another book entirely. How did she know that he wouldn't do that again? What if, in the suture, she got an amazing job offer reporting in Europe for two years, and Logan didn't want to move their family? If she was going to marry him, she had to be able to trust completely that, even when they didn't agree about everything, he wouldn't stand in her way. She needed to know that he wouldn't change his mind on her like he did when he asked her to move to California with him as his fiancé.

But that was only the logical reason as to why her answer was still no. Deep down, in the parts of her psyche that she rarely let see the light of day, she was completely terrified by marriage.

It wasn't all too surprising, really. When first confronted by intimacy, her first instinct was always to run. She'd literally run away after her first kiss, she completely panicked when a boy first told her that he loved her, and she had pulled away at the first few opportunities she'd had to have sex. Even with Logan she'd been shy at first, despite their casual relationship at the beginning. Rory had always needed time to adjust to a new idea in a relationship, the exception being when she moved in with Logan.

She didn't want to blame her mother. It wasn't that Lorelai had influenced her decision in any way, because that wasn't exactly it either. It had nothing to do with something her mom had said to her, it was more everything she'd come to know about relationships from growing up in her mother's home. Lorelai had never really gotten close to a man before, not until Max. And then, at the last second, she panicked. What if that happened to Rory? She couldn't do that to Logan, couldn't put him through that. She didn't think she could handle it if things fell apart with him the way they'd fallen apart with Lorelai and Max, Lorelai and Luke part one, and the biggest being Lorelai and Christopher. Her mother had jumped into marriage with Christopher far too quickly, blinded completely by the romantic haze she was in. Rory needed time to think before making this decision. She needed to be completely sure she was ready for this. No, her mother was wrong. She didn't hesitate because she was unsure of Logan. She hesitated because she was unsure of herself.

* * *

><p>Lorelai hadn't really given much thought as to how she would break the news about Rory to the rest of the town. It was a delicate situation that needed to be handled with care. What she hadn't counted on, however, was Babette watching her pull into the driveway, alone, after the Gilmore family "dinner."<p>

"How ya doing, dollface?" Babette called from her spot on her porch steps. "I thought you and Rory were at your parent's house for dinner. Where'd Rory go?"

"She, uh…" Lorelai had to think fast. "She went out with a friend. She'll be home later."

"Well, isn't that nice? Catching up with friends while she's home. Is she going back to work tomorrow?"

"Not exactly, no."

"That's nice. A few extra days for you to have some girl time. She going back soon?"

"Well…" Lorelai wasn't quick enough to think of an evasive enough answer. "No, she's not. Going back, that is. She's going to look for another job, actually."

"Oh, that's too bad!" Babette said. "Was it not working out for her?"

"No, the job was great. She just…needed something a little less hectic, that's all."

Babette laughed. "That girl? What happened? She's not pregnant, is she?" Babette asked with another laugh.

Lorelai opened her mouth to reply, but no words came out.

"Oh my god, she's pregnant, isn't she? Oh, that poor baby! How is she doing? Is she alright? Oh, she must be a total mess!"

Lorelai sighed. She hadn't meant to let the cat out of the bag; Babette just caught her off guard. But it was better now, while Rory wasn't home, than later. "She's doing alright. A little stressed out, but you know Rory. She can handle anything."

"Oh, I just feel so awful!" Babette continued. "Is there something I can do? Maybe I can make her some cookies! Or some hot cocoa!"

"I'm sure she'd love that," said Lorelai with a smile. It was a nice contrast from the way things had gone with her parents. Once she got over how invested the town was in her business, Rory would appreciate the gesture. "Anyway, I need to get going. Lots to do tomorrow. You can talk to Rory tomorrow."

After that, news spread through the town about Rory's pregnancy like wildfire. Everywhere they went, Rory and Lorelai were followed by stares, the curious townspeople whispering behind their hands as they walked by. Babette became the center of attention as the town, thirsty for information but too hesitant to ask with Lorelai around, or with Luke glaring in the background, approached the only source of knowledge available to them.

"But how far along is she?" Gypsy asked Babette one day in the diner.

"I don't know, a few weeks I guess."

"So what are Rory and Logan going to do?"

"No, didn't you hear?" said Miss Patty, keeping her voice down so as not to alert Luke as to their topic of conversation. "They broke up months ago, right after her graduation! Turns out that Logan _proposed_ to her!"

"No way!"

"There's more! He wanted her to move to California with him, but she said no, so they broke up. They went their separate ways and everything."

"But I _saw_ him here dropping Rory off the other day," Babette said, her voice rising a little bit.

"Say, Lane," said Miss Patty, stopping Lane on her way back to the counter with the coffee pot in her hand. "What do you know about the whole Rory situation? Is she back with that handsome Logan? I thought he went to California?"

"Yeah, and how far along is she?" Babette asked.

Lane glanced over her shoulder, making sure that Luke wasn't within earshot. "Look, guys. It's not my place to talk about it. You're gonna have to ask Rory yourselves."

But with Rory's protection agency hanging around, the opportunity never presented itself. That is, until Luke and Lorelai left for their honeymoon a couple of weeks later. With no Luke around glaring at everyone who so much as glanced in Rory's direction, and with no Lorelai to keep the paparazzi away, Rory became prey for the vultures.

"Come on, sugar, we're dying to know!" said Babette, who was practically bursting with curiosity when she and Miss Patty approached Rory in the diner that morning. Rory had been sitting at the counter, sipping coffee while chatting with Lane. Rory had a full day ahead of her of sending out resumes to every news paper in the state of Connecticut, a day that could not begin without the help of coffee. (She was sticking very strictly to the two cups per day rule the doctor had insisted on, sometimes switching to half decaf in order to make her daily allowance last just a little bit longer.)

There wasn't much use in holding them off much longer. During the two weeks that the news had been public knowledge, Rory had gotten some time to get use to the way the town would be treating her in the future. It was a little awkward at first, walking around town when she _knew _that everyone was whispering about her.

"Everyone's staring," Rory had said to Lorelai that first morning as they walked to the diner for breakfast.

"They're not staring," Lorelai lied. They both knew it, but it was easier to pretend that it wasn't happening. "Don't worry, kid. I think everyone's so afraid of what Luke will do if they're caught harassing you that they won't really say anything to you directly."

That much was true, but Rory couldn't really hold them off forever. It was like she was testing the waters a bit, and now it was time to openly discuss the matter. Besides, maybe if she got used to talking about it with other people, she'd get used to it herself. Maybe she could even start to feel happy about it, sooner or later.

"I'm about ten weeks now," Rory told them, her heart pounding the whole time. "And I'm still looking for jobs in the area, but I expect to be hearing from some of them soon."

"And your boyfriend…?" asked Miss Patty, leaving the question hanging in the air.

"Ex, actually," Rory verified. She should have known that Logan would be a topic of much curiosity for the town. They'd want to know everything about their situation. "But we're fine. He moved home from California and we're getting along pretty well. Everything's fine."

But everything wasn't fine. Sure, on the surface it was. But Rory hadn't spoken to Logan since the day he dropped her off after telling their families. She wanted to call him, if only so they could talk, but she had no reason to. Not anymore. With nothing new to report to him, Rory couldn't think of a legitimate excuse to pick up the phone and dial his number. So the silence continued.

The worst part wasn't even the lack of communication from Logan. It was letting her mind wander to thoughts about Logan during his absence. It must have been the pregnancy hormones; it was the only real explanation. Because it wasn't just that she was thinking about Logan all the time, it was that she couldn't stop imagining herself having sex with Logan. Her mind had _never_ been that dirty, not even when her and Logan were still together. Not even when Logan was in London and they'd send each other dirty text messages to make up for the lack of intimacy.

"Can I ask you something?" Rory asked Lane one day when the two of them were out taking the twins for a walk in the stroller. She hadn't really needed to rely on her friend for much pregnancy advice before now; that came from the mountain of books Rory had bought from the bookstore a couple of weeks ago.

A lot of the information she experienced before she even read about it. The morning sickness, now that she was on week twelve, was staring to get a little better. At the very least, Rory was no longer throwing up every morning and evening. Her clothes were starting to feel a little tighter, her breasts a little more tender. And her moodiness was getting out of control. Lorelai, upon returning from her honeymoon with Luke, had to duck as Rory threw a slice of pizza at her, the reason that Rory chose to throw it was still a mystery. All of this Rory expected, but what she _didn't_ expect was to constantly be thinking about sex.

"Of course you can," Lane told her. "You know you can ask me anything."

"Okay," said Rory with a sigh. "When you were pregnant with the boys, did you…" she hesitated, unsure as to how to ask this question. "Okay, this is going to sound really weird. But all I can think about is having sex with Logan. Like, all the time."

Lane laughed. "Oh god, when I was pregnant that was _all_ I thought about for like, two months straight. And let me tell you, thank _god_ I got pregnant, otherwise I may not have _ever_ had sex with Zack ever again!"

"Really?" Rory asked with a smile.

"Totally normal," Lane insisted. "We were practically having sex twenty four seven for a while!"

But upon hearing that, and coming to the realization that there was nothing she could do, Rory deflated slightly. "So you're saying this feeling won't go away?"

"Well it will _eventually_, but…" Lane glanced at Rory's crestfallen face, realizing the problem. "Oh. No, I'm sorry. What I meant to say is - "

"Its okay, Lane," Rory said, trying to keep the sadness off of her face. "So it's just something I have to deal with. Like my boobs getting bigger. So what if I can't have sex even though my hormones make me feel like I'm a teenager? Lots of people deal with it, right?"

Lane sighed. "Maybe if you talk to Logan…"

"And say what, exactly?"

"I don't know. Maybe that you're still in love with him?"

Rory laughed. "What difference would that make, Lane? We can't be together, end of discussion. We both want different things."

"How do you know?" Lane asked. "It's been three months now and you guys haven't talked about it since the break up. Why don't you just _talk_ to him?"

"Because I can't even _think_ about it without wanting to cry!" said Rory, nearly on the verge of tears. "I told him. I told him _months_ ago that I wasn't ready to get married. That hasn't changed. So I have nothing more to say about it."

They had arrived back at Lane's apartment. Rory helped her friend carry the boys, who had both fallen asleep, back inside, putting them down for their nap. They returned to the front porch in order to continue their conversation without waking them.

"So what, you're just going to pretend like pretend like you're not still in love with him forever? You really think that you can just act like you've moved on?"

"Logan won't know the difference. He hasn't figured it out yet."

Lane shook her head. "Says the girl who can't stop thinking about having sex with her ex boyfriend."

"Well, what am I supposed to do? I can't just call him up and be like, 'hey Logan, I know that I broke your heart when I said that I couldn't marry you, but I'm really horny right now because I'm pregnant, and since you're kind of the one responsible, do you think you can do something about that?'"

"Yeah, that sounds pretty good to me. Do that."

"I can't do _that_!" Rory exclaimed, turning bright red in embarrassment.

"Well you need to do _something_! You've been home for almost a month now, and all you ever talk about is Logan. Seriously, Rory. You can't just pretend like you're okay with being apart."

Rory rolled her eyes. _Just watch me_, she thought.


	12. The Price Is Right

**A/N: **This chapter ended up taking incredibly long to write. I needed to have a bunch of little things happen while also jumping the timeline up several weeks in a short amount of time. So if it seems a little choppy at times, I apologize. The next chapter will be much more fluid. Also, it will probably be finished in a day or so, so there won't be as long of a wait. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Twelve - The Price Is Right<span>

Rory thought that that summer might possibly be the longest summer of her life. Since she'd graduated from Yale, Rory had made one of the most difficult decisions of her life, inevitably ending a nearly three year relationship. She'd gotten an amazing job only to find out a few weeks later that she was pregnant. She'd fought with and made up with Logan several times, although never quite repairing the damage she'd done to their relationship in the first place. She'd moved back home, watched her mother finally marry Luke, and gotten into the worst fight she'd ever had with her grandparents. And all of that had happened before June was over.

Her life was in chaos, and she needed to get it back on track. Rory had a strict list of things that she needed to get done, and she wasn't willing to compromise on it. First, she needed a job. Second, she needed an apartment. If she could just do those two things, then maybe she could start to feel like her life was on track. She needed to get some stability back into her life. She had no job and she was _still_ barely in contact with Logan. She'd seen him briefly at her twelve week doctor's appointment, but the two had only interacted politely. All of the things that she wanted to say to him - that she was sorry, that she missed him, that she wished things could be different - remained on the tip of her tongue. Soon she'd have permanent bite marks from the things left unsaid.

To make matters worse, Rory wasn't on speaking terms with her grandparents. That's not from lack of trying - on their part, anyway. Rory was still mad at them. Emily had said appalling things to both her and Lorelai when she told them she was pregnant, and Richard's reaction wasn't much better either. Worse than that, though, was the way the Gilmores seemed to think they had any control or say over the situation. It was Lorelai all over again, only this time, Rory wasn't a 16 year old. She was a woman with a Yale degree, and was more than capable of making her own decisions. It was almost laughable that they thought they had any say in the decisions Rory made about how she'd raise her child. They had no say when this was happening to their own child. Rory wasn't sure where they got the idea that they could tell Rory what to do.

And yet, even after their argument, Emily was still acting as though no fight had happened.

Just like the town had waited until Lorelai was away to begin asking questions, Emily waited until the day she knew her daughter had left on her honeymoon; she was clever like that. Rory had been sitting in the diner eating breakfast and talking to Lane when her cell phone rang. She answered it absentmindedly, thinking it could be about a job.

"Hello?" Rory said. She hadn't even checked the caller id which, admittedly, was her first mistake.

"Hello, Rory, it's your grandmother!"

Rory's body tensed immediately. Lane frowned at her in confusion.

"Hello, Grandmother," Rory replied, letting the tension seep into her voice as she emphasized her words. Lane gave her a knowing look and wandered away to refill some coffee mugs. "What can I do for you?"

"I was just calling to tell you that I've had a little chat with the Huntzbergers. After a lot of discussion, we came to what we believe is a fair agreement. Now - "

"I'm going to stop you right there, Grandma," Rory said. "I don't what to hear whatever agreement you guys came to. The only people involved in the decisions about me and the baby will be me, Logan, and my doctor. So unless your name is Logan, or you've suddenly gotten an MD and are legally permitted to practice medicine, then you will have no further involvement in what decisions are made regarding the baby."

"Young lady!" Rory knew that tone. It was the tone of the financially superior, used by those who always thought they knew better than those they were speaking to, no matter the circumstances. "I am only trying to do what's best for you! Now - "

"No, you're trying to do what's best for _you_. Now, I didn't come to you looking for help, I came to you as your granddaughter looking for support. So I'm sorry, but if you don't want to give it, then your involvement ends here."

She knew that wouldn't be the end of it, not really. But Rory hung up the phone anyway, and refused to answer any further calls from her grandparents.

So, in response, Rory dove into finding a job completely. If she was going to start a new life for her and her baby, then she had to get started. That began with finding a job and getting an apartment.

"Babe, you really don't have to move out right away," Lorelai insisted one night as they placed all the snacks for movie night on the coffee table. "Luke and I are more than happy to have you here. You know that, right?"

"I know." Rory poured the bag of chips into a bowl and unscrewed the lid on the salsa jar. "I just need to do this on my own. I know you want to be there and help me, and I'm so grateful for that, but I need to get my own place."

Lorelai sighed. "I know, I get it. You want your independence. I just wanted you to know that you don't have to rush it. You can relax, maybe save a little money up."

But Rory shook her head. "I need to get control of something in my life. That starts with an apartment."

Luke walked through the front door at that moment, taking in the sea of junk food already sitting out on the coffee table. He threw down the bags of food he'd brought at home at Lorelai's request, completely disgusted.

"There is not one single item in that arrangement that could even be considered good for you," Luke commented, horrified by their food choices. "Rory, you're pregnant. You should be eating healthy."

"Hey, you're right. I don't think this is enough," Rory said nonchalantly. "We do have one extra mouth to feed."

"Chinese food?" asked Lorelai.

"But we already ordered pizza. _And_ Luke brought home burgers and fries."

"Chinese food?"

"You're right, what was I thinking?"

"Well, it's been awhile since you've done a Gilmore movie night. I can forgive the indisgression."

Rolling his eyes and muttering under his breath, Luke shuffled into the kitchen.

"Hey, do we have to change the name of movie night now that you're married to Luke?" Rory asked. "It can't really be a true Gilmore Girls movie night if you're not technically a Gilmore."

"Why? I didn't take Luke's last name."

"No, but you hyphenated. Is it now the Gilmore-Danes movie night or something?"

Lorelai gasped, mocking shock that she could even suggest such a thing. "No way! Luke will try to introduce healthy food into our tradition! We must keep his good eating habits away from our future inductee, Gilmore Junior."

"I might not have any control over that. Logan likes to eat things that are good for him, for some reason. He might feed the baby vegetables or something when my back is turned."

"At least one of you will give that kid something good!" Luke yelled from the kitchen.

"Hey, you're supposed to be on my side!" Rory yelled back.

* * *

><p>Logan was not very good at being patient.<p>

He'd always been the kind of guy who went after the things he wanted. He never sat around and waited for them to come to him. Instead, he'd go out and get them himself. It was how he lived every aspect of his life. If he wanted to go to Spain, Logan would hop on a plane and go to Spain. If he wanted to go skydiving, he would go skydiving. And if Logan wanted a girl, there was no way he'd just sit back and wait. Logan would be sure to have her in his bed within hours; a day or two at most.

Of course, Rory was different; she had been from the beginning. Logan had debated with himself for weeks as to whether or not he should ask her out; he only even began dating her after she made the first move. And despite his efforts to keep things casual, he was in too deep right from the very beginning. He saw that now. But the main difference between now and then is that he wasn't afraid of ruining his relationship with her when he screwed up before. (Because sure enough, Logan kept screwing things up.) Logan couldn't afford to screw things up this time. Not only could he lose Rory forever if he screwed things up, but he could lose the baby. He wouldn't let that happen.

So Logan waited. He was cautious and hesitant, and he waited for some sign that he should do something, _anything_ to try to win Rory back. But no sign came. He didn't know where he stood with Rory anymore. Part of him was curious, but another part of him still wasn't ready to talk about the proposal. He _knew_ that the proposal had gone wrong. He shouldn't have made it so big, he shouldn't have given her an ultimatum, he should have talked to her about it first. There were a million things that he could have done differently. And yet despite all that, Logan was still a little hurt by Rory's refusal. He knew that he had no right to be; Rory had every right to turn him down. But that didn't keep her rejection from stinging a little.

So he kept waiting, something that Logan had never been good at. Which is what brought him to Finn's penthouse apartment in New York one weekend.

"What you need, mate, is a distraction," Finn insisted as he mixed Logan a drink at the bar. "You need to go out, find some random sheila, do lots of naughty things to her, and then forget about her."

"Are you crazy?" Logan asked, accepting the drink that Finn offered him. "Do you want me to sabotage my chances of fixing things with Rory?"

"You're absolutely right, don't do that. I have a chance of winning the bet, now that Colin's out of the running."

"Not unless Rory decides to get back together with him in the next couple of months," Colin commented.

Finn shook his head. "You said one month, and that month has passed."

"We're not betting on the Price is Right scale, Finn."

"Of course we are. It's whoever is closest without going over. You guessed one month, and it's been a month. Which means that I win of they get back together before the baby's born."

"We never judge on the Price is Right scale! It's whoever's closest, that's always been the rule."

Logan shook his head as his friends argued. "I'm glad to see my life is providing you two with so much entertainment. I should be getting royalties from this. And aren't you guys supposed to be _distracting_ me from Rory? This isn't helping."

"Sorry, man," said Colin, sitting in an armchair across from Logan. "But we both think you're crazy. You're just sitting around _waiting_ for Rory to give you some sort of signal that's never going to come. Why can't you just _tell_ her already that you want to get back together?"

Logan shook his head. "Come talk to me when the woman you love is having your baby. _Then_ tell me that I'm crazy."

"Enough already," Finn interjected. "No more talking about Gilmore. Tonight we're going out."

* * *

><p>Rory found a job sooner than expected, and from there, everything fell place quickly. What surprised her was the fact that she was back in New Haven, working as a reporter at the New Haven Register. Almost the minute she'd received the official job offer, Rory was on the streets with Lorelai searching for an apartment.<p>

That, it turned out, was much harder to accomplish. Not because there weren't any places in Stars Hollow. It was the fact that her standards needed to be high. Logan wouldn't allow her to live in some run down dump, of that she was sure. She would have happily gone to battle with him on that; after all, he had no say in the matter. But he _did_ have a say in the matter. His child would be living there, after all.

"I can't afford it," Rory whispered to her mom as they looked out the window of the ninth apartment Rory had found. "It's beautiful, but I can't afford it."

It was too, it was absolutely perfect. It was a walkup overlooking the town square with huge windows and a balcony, a fairly large living room and master bedroom, and two bathrooms. The kitchen was tiny and there was no dining room, but it was still spacious. The kitchen opened up into the living room so that there was still plenty of room for a small table, and there was tons of storage space. Plus, it was partially furnished.

"Are you sure?" Lorelai questioned. She didn't necessarily want her daughter to move out, but Rory had set her mind to it.

"I'd be barely scrapping by," Rory replied with a sigh. "Sooner or later Logan would figure that out and insist on giving me more money. I don't want to be one of those girls. His parents already think I'm a gold digger."

Rory glanced one last time around the apartment with longing. It was everything she wanted in an apartment, and more. It was even perfectly placed between her mom's and the diner, as well as a short walk to Lane's. And it had been newly renovated.

She wanted that apartment, but Rory didn't know how she could make it happen without spending all her money on rent and utilities every month, not to mention food.

"Give me a minute," Lorelai said quickly, disrupting Rory's thoughts. She watched curiously as Lorelai pulled aside Hank, the superintendent. She could see them having a lively discussion, although Rory couldn't quite hear what they were talking about. Finally, Hank nodded, and Lorelai skipped back over to her daughter with a rather animated hop in her step.

"I just got Hank to agree to include the utilities with your rent, _and_ waive the security deposit. Can you afford it now?"

"What?" Rory was flabbergasted. "Wait, are you serious? How did you do that?"

"A lady must never reveal her secrets," Lorelai replied evasively. Seriously, kid. You got the apartment if you still want it."

"Want it? Of course I want it! Oh my god, thank you, Mom!" She flung herself into Lorelai's arms, squeezing her mother tightly. She didn't know how her mother managed to pull off those things, or how she'd learn to pull amazing stunts for her child when the time came. She thought that it might be some sort of secret Mom Gene, one that only kicks in when the baby is finished with the whole gestation period thing. After nine months of being a walking incubator, suddenly mothers know how to Get Things Done. It was how Rory's own mother operated. Whenever things seemed impossible and Lorelai needed to make something happened, she somehow managed to pull it off. It must, she thought, be something that only mothers were capable of.

* * *

><p>Weeks passed, and the summer was winding to a close. After the initial whirlwind drama that came with his move back to Connecticut, Logan's life began to calm back down as the days grew hotter and longer. His life resettled into what he assumed was normal. It was as normal as he could make it with a pregnant ex girlfriend.<p>

The silence between him and Rory was growing. He kept expecting to hear from her, waiting for an update on her life. Did she have a job yet? How was the baby? He'd barely heard from her since the fallout with their families, and it was making Logan anxious. He picked up his phone a million times to call her, but what could he say? Their relationship, or whatever you could call them, wasn't what it once was anymore. He hated to think that this was how things were going to be in the future; contacting each other only when necessary. He missed having her in his life. And he hated to think that he couldn't be as involved in this process with her as he'd like to be. But Logan didn't know how to bridge that gap.

Logan tried to shake the thoughts out of his head as he got out of his car and made his way towards a familiar café in Hartford. It was Sunday, what should have been his day off, until his old secretary Tracy flew to town delivering information from the Palo Alto office. Tracy was the only one who had been involved in Logan's project back in California every step of the way, and therefore had been volunteered to work as a go between with Logan and Anthony, who had taken over after Logan's departure. In a similar capacity, she'd also been working as a go between within the two offices, passing along information from Logan to the partners. Since Logan was unable to leave Connecticut at the moment due to his need to concentrate on getting everything up and running in Hartford, Tracy no choice but to take a business trip to the East Coast.

Naturally, a pre work meeting before the real business was discussed during office hours was necessary. Hence why the two were meeting in a coffee shop on the weekend.

"Hey, sorry I'm late." Tracy was already sitting at a table by the window, a cup of coffee sitting in front of her. She had a few folders spread out, going over charts and documents, but thankfully it didn't seem to be too much paperwork.

Tracy smiled as Logan approached her. He had to admit, it was nice to see her again. He could use another ear to listen to him as he panicked about his impending fatherhood without being berated, as his sister surely would.

"Good to see you again, Logan," said Tracy as she stood up from her seat and gave him a warm, welcoming hug."

"Logan?"

* * *

><p>Rory froze when she saw Logan walk into the café. She'd been running errands in Hartford and had decided to stay to work on her article, desperate for a change of scenery. There were too many distractions in Stars Hollow, too many people wanting to talk about every intimate detail of her pregnancy every time she set foot outside of the apartment. She was roughly eighteen weeks along and everyone from Babette to Miss Patty to Andrew to Kirk had some bit of advice for her. (Which Rory found ironic, considering that none of these rather colorful characters had children of their own.) She couldn't even go to the market without Taylor dissecting her food purchasing choices!<p>

So Rory decided to leave town for a while so she could by some clothing that didn't feel quite so much like an extra skin, because only in Stars Hollow would her need to buy a couple new bras and some sweatpants turn into a topic for discussion at the Town Meeting. And while she was out, she decided to get a jump start on her next article. There was nothing quite so distracting like diving head first into research writing, and she was in desperate need of a distraction.

What she hadn't expected was for Logan's voice to pull her out of the haze she usually fell into when in full on research mode. She hadn't even noticed him walk in at first. She had a steaming cup of coffee sitting next to her, her laptop was set up with multiple internet windows going all at once, and she had a notebook in which she was fiercely scribbling notes, highlighting, and placing post-its. Rory whipped her head up at the sound of his voice, her heart racing furiously. He hadn't seen her. He was giving a hug to some woman whom she didn't recognize, but was smiling at him in a way that showed familiarity.

Rory narrowed her eyes. She was pretty, whoever she was. And Logan looked very comfortable with her. Panic began to settle in. This is what she'd feared all along, having to watch him with another woman. Who was this woman anyway? And how exactly did she know Logan? Were they dating? It was very possible that Logan had met someone else since moving back to Connecticut; he'd been back for a couple of months now. That was plenty of time for him to meet and begin dating someone else.

"Logan?"

She hadn't meant to say it out loud; she'd wanted to leave the café without being noticed. But both parties had looked up when she'd said her name, giving Rory now means for an easy escape.

Heart still racing, Rory stood up from her table and walked awkwardly over towards them, adjusting her shirt carefully as she did. Whoever this girl was, the last thing she wanted to reveal to her was the fact that she was pregnant with Logan's baby.

"Wh-what are you doing here?" Rory stuttered. She bit her lower lip nervously, mentally kicking herself at her inability to simply play it cool in front of him.

Logan raised an eyebrow. "I live here, remember? In Hartford. I'm meeting a friend for coffee." He gestured towards the woman who was now sitting across from him. "What are _you_ doing here?"

"Oh! I was just…running some errands."

"With your laptop?" He glanced over at her table, which very obviously resembled the work stations she so often set up when she was researching.

"Well, and working on an article. You know me. I like my research."

"You got a job?" he asked her curiously. "Huh. I guess we haven't talked in a few weeks. I kept expecting you to call with an update, but…"

Rory glanced nervously at the woman, wondering how much she knew.

Logan must have noticed her movement. "Oh! Sorry, how rude of me. Rory, this is Tracy. She was my assistant back in Palo Alto. Tracy, this is Rory."

"Oh!" said the woman in a surprised tone that indicated she had a very clear picture of who Rory was. She stood up, extending her hand to Rory. "It's so nice to meet you," she said sincerely.

Rory plastered a smile to her face, and reached out to shake the woman's hand. "It's nice to meet you, too."

Rory wondered what Tracy was doing there, and what the real nature of their relationship was. She had flown all the way out from California to visit Logan, that wasn't the sort of thing that people who are just friends do, especially when they've only known each other for a few months.

"So, you got a job?" Logan asked again.

She'd completely forgotten what they were talking about. "Huh?"

"You said you're doing research."

"Right. Yeah, I'm working for the New Haven Register now." Her voice sounded far shakier than she wanted it to. "So, you know. Back on the old stomping grounds."

She felt like such a fool. She'd been holding onto hope, thinking that there was some possibility that maybe Logan still had feelings for her. But she was being naïve. Of course he had moved on. What kind of person held onto someone who didn't want to marry him, even if she was pregnant with his child? She was stupid. She was an idiot.

She had to get out of there.

"I should go, actually," Rory said. "I'm, uh…meeting my mom for dinner. So. Bye."

* * *

><p>Logan frowned as Rory turned his back on her, and quickly proceeded to pack up her things.<p>

"Rory, hold on." He followed her to the table, placing a hand on her arm to still her motions. "Is everything okay?" he asked her. He couldn't figure out what the problem was, or why she was acting so jumpy. He hadn't heard from her in weeks.

"I'm fine, Logan," she whispered.

"No you're not," he replied, lowering his voice a bit. Maybe she was uncomfortable talking about what was bothering her in front of a stranger. "What's going on, Ace?"

Rory sighed audibly, relaxing a bit at the use of her old nickname. She finished putting her things away a bit more slowly, and then gave herself a moment to collect herself before standing up to face Logan. "You should get back to your friend."

He glanced over at Tracy, who was looking at the pair of them curiously. "She's fine," Logan insisted. "It's you I'm worried about. Come on, why haven't I heard from you?"

Rory shrugged as she pulled her bag onto her shoulder. "There's been nothing really to say, I guess."

"Except that you have a job."

"I got an apartment, too."

"Aren't those things you think I should know?"

"Why?" Rory replied. "We're not together anymore."

Logan was a bit taken aback by the hostility in her voice. "Do you really think I wouldn't want to know those things? Come on, Ace. You haven't even called to tell me when your next doctor's appointment is. I know that has to be coming up. Are you avoiding me?"

"Why would I be avoiding you?" Rory asked. But she didn't meet his eye when she responded.

"I don't know, Ace. You tell me."

"I'm not avoiding you, Logan!" Rory finally snapped. "Look. I have to go. I have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday. Come if you want, I don't care." And she shoved past him on her way out the door, leaving Logan standing stunned behind her. The coffee that she had just purchased was still sitting at the table.

"So that was Rory," said Tracy knowingly when Logan finally returned.

"Yeah," he said, still a little confused by the encounter. "Yeah, that was Rory."

"She's pretty."

Logan softened a bit. "I think she's mad at me."

"It probably has nothing to do with you," Tracy reassured him. "Really. When I was pregnant, the slightest thing set me off."

But it wasn't just that, of that Logan was sure. He couldn't quite shake the feeling that there was something Logan was missing, some piece of the puzzle he couldn't see.

* * *

><p>Rory was positively shaking by the time she stormed into her mother's house after having driven home from Hartford as fast as possible, breaking several speed limits along the way.<p>

"He's moved on!" she yelled at a stunned Lorelai, who was sitting on the couch watching TV.

Lorelai reached for the remote and shut the TV off. "What are you talking about, babe?"

"Logan. He's moved on." She was now pacing in front of her mother.

"What makes you think that?"

"Because I just ran into him in Hartford. He was meeting some woman there who was visiting from California. And they looked awfully chummy!"

Lorelai frowned. "Rory, are you sure - "

"Of course I'm sure, Mom!" She threw her arms up in the air, emphasizing her point. "People don't just fly all the way across the country on a whim. They do it for a reason."

"How do you know she wasn't there on business?"

Rory scoffed. "Oh come on, Mom. They were clearly know each other as more than just business associates. They hugged and everything!"

"And as we all know, hugging is the equivalent of consummating right there in front of you."

"Exactly!"

Lorelai rolled her eyes. "Well, sweetie, I was joking. Look, why don't you sit down, take a deep breath, and tell me what happened?"

Rory was clearly not ready to calm down just yet. "What more is there to say? I saw him with another woman. He's moved on."

"Rory - "

"Oh god! If they me in California and she's flying out here to visit him, that must mean that they started dating before he left. We were only broken up for a month when I told him I was pregnant! I can't believe he proposed to me and then started seeing someone else so quickly!"

"I'm sure that's not the case."

"Well, what other explanation is there, Mom?" Rory snapped. "Because I can't come up with any other solution as to why some woman would fly across the country to see him. I mean, here I am, with his _baby_ growing in my stomach, still holding out some sort of home, when he's fallen in love with some other woman! How stupid am I?

"You're not stupid! Will you just sit down already so I can talk to you?"

Rory glared at Lorelai. "What could you possibly say to make this better?"

"Logan's still in love with you."

That stopped Rory from pacing madly. She walked around the coffee table and sunk into the couch, staring blankly straight ahead. "What?"

"Honor told me."

She shifted in her seat so she was facing Lorelai. "Honor told you."

"That day we told your grandparents. When I was dropping her off, she was prying for information about you."

Rory hesitated. "You didn't…"

She shook her head. "I told her nothing. But she let slip accidentally that Logan wasn't over you."

She didn't know what to make of this new revelation. "Logan told her that he wasn't over me?"

"Well I don't think that's exactly what he said. But she's his sister. She probably doesn't need to hear him say it to know it's true."

"But that doesn't mean - "

"Of course it does. Just like I don't need you to tell me that you're still in love with Logan for me to know it's true. I _know_ you, kid. You wouldn't come storming in here, freaking out because you saw Logan _hug_ someone else if you still completely head over heels for the guy. Of course, you may have had a little help from your pregnancy hormones, but that doesn't change the fact that you're clearly not over him."

Rory sighed. "Why didn't you tell me any of this sooner?"

"Because it's your relationship to fix, not mine. You have to be the one to want it."

Rory lowered her head into her mother's lap, and Lorelai gently ran her fingers through her daughter's hair, like she was a child again."

"You really think he's still in love with me?" she asked softly.

"There's only one way to find out, kid."


	13. I Want It That Way

Chapter Thirteen - I Want It That Way

Try as she might, Rory couldn't forget what her mother had told her about Logan. Logan still loved her. He still loved her. He hadn't moved on like she feared he would.

But how could it true? If he really still loved her, why hadn't he said anything? Was he afraid that she didn't love him anymore? How could he think that? When Rory told him about the pregnancy, she had let him know that it broke her heart to turn down his proposal. He _had_ to know that she still loved him. Didn't he?

Maybe their differences were too great. Maybe the failed proposal was standing in the way. Logan was too hurt by her refusal, they wanted different things, and the pregnancy wasn't enough to change his mind. _She_ wasn't enough to change his mind. Maybe, despite everything, despite his feelings for her, he didn't want to be with her anymore.

She wondered what he was thinking. Why couldn't he just tell her how he felt? What was he waiting for? It wasn't like Rory could just go to him and tell him how _she_ felt. She told him where she stood the day she turned down his proposal. She told him what she needed, and he couldn't give that to her. _He_ was the one to walk away from them, not her. Rory hadn't gone anywhere.

And then who was that woman she'd seen him with, and what was she doing visiting Logan from California?

"Pull yourself together, Gilmore," Rory muttered to herself as she changed into pajamas at last. She ran her hands along her tiny baby bump as she pulled a tank top over her head. She lowered herself onto the couch slowly, sinking down into the cushions with a sigh of relief. It was late; she hadn't planned on staying at her mother's house for so long. They'd ended up talking for hours, and then watching a couple movies to get her mind off things. She had to stop obsessing over what was going on in Logan's head.

"I guess it's just you and me, little one," Rory whispered to her stomach as she ran her hands over it again. Her stomach growled in response, and Rory grinned. Now that she wasn't throwing up all the time, midnight snacks were becoming a necessity. It wasn't enough that Rory was constantly eating when she _wasn't_ pregnant; now that there was a parasite inside her stomach that relied on her for food, Rory's hunger never ceased.

"Alright, I get it," she told her stomach, pulling down the tank top that had ridden up slightly. "I hope you're okay with pizza again, because that's all I've got."

It was then, as Rory went to push herself up off the couch, that she felt it. At first it felt like a slight fluttering in her stomach, almost like butterfly wings brushing against her. Rory frowned at the sensation, staring down. Was it a muscle spasm of some sort? Or was she just really hungry?

Then Rory felt a very distinctive kick against her lower abdomen.

* * *

><p>Logan groaned at the sound of his cell phone ringing. He was beyond frustrated after his run in with Rory. She was giving him nothing and getting angry for reasons he couldn't understand. He was trying, god knew he was trying. But it was as though that wasn't enough for Rory. He didn't know what to do about her anymore, how to get through to her.<p>

He had just gotten to sleep when his phone started making that irritating, high pitched ringing noise. He willed it to stop, assuming that once it went to voicemail, the ringing would go away. Which it did for about ten seconds, before the noise started over again.

Half asleep, Logan groped his night stand in search of his cell phone, desperate to make it stop that incessant ringing sound. "Hello?" he grumbled.

"Logan?"

Logan rolled onto his back and pushed himself into a sitting position. "Rory?" His voice was rough with sleep. Logan switched his phone to his opposite ear and reached over to turn on his bedside lamp. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," she said, but there was something in her voice that he couldn't quite identify. It worried him. "I'm just…" her voice trailed off. "Can you come over?"

Logan frowned, glancing at his clock. "It's one o'clock in the morning, Rory. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's - " He heard her breath hitch slightly. "Please, Logan?" Rory pleaded.

He sighed, his heart melting a little despite his frustration with her. There was no way he could deny her when she asked him like that. In any case, her sudden middle of the night phone call made him nervous. What if something was seriously wrong?

"I'll be right there."

* * *

><p>She ate one slice of pizza. She ate another. Before there had been more than half a pie left, but as Rory waited impatiently for Logan to come over, she ate it all. She had called him on pure instinct, not wanting to be alone. She hadn't thought about what time it was, or that it was probably inappropriate to call her ex boyfriend in the middle of the night and practically beg him to come over, especially after the way she'd snapped at him earlier. It didn't matter. At that moment, Rory needed Logan to be there. All logical thought had gone out the window.<p>

At long last there was a knock on her door. Rory practically stumbled off her couch and over to the door, yanking it opened quickly to reveal a very worried looking Logan standing with his fist raised, ready to knock again.

"Are you okay, Ace?" he asked her as he stepped across the threshold. Rory closed the door and walked back into the living room, Logan following close behind her.

Rory turned around quickly to face him. "I felt the baby kick!" she blurted out in a rush.

Logan was flabbergasted. It wasn't what he expected her to say. "You…"

"I felt the baby kick," she said, a little slower this time. "I'm sorry, I know it's late. But I had just gotten home and I was sitting on the couch thinking about reheating some pizza, and then all of a sudden I felt this like…" Rory gestured with her hands, trying to find the right word. "…this weird flutter in my stomach. And, I don't know, I didn't really think. There I was, sitting alone in my living room, and I'd just experienced what is supposed to be this _huge _milestone in pregnancy, only I had no one else to talk to or to share it with. And I just…I didn't know who else to call." By the end of her speech, her voice revealed a vulnerability in it that she hoped he wouldn't notice.

Logan processed her words for a few seconds while she took a moment to catch her breath. "You…felt the baby kick…?" Logan asked slowly.

Rory nodded. "I don't know if you'd be able to feel it. I've felt it a couple more times while I was waiting, but it's very faint. Here." And without even pausing to think first, Rory grabbed his hand, pushed it underneath the edge of her tank top, and placed it on the small bump of her stomach.

At first, they waited in silence as nothing happened. Then it occurred to Logan that this was the closest they had been since before the breakup, months ago. Sure, Logan had touched Rory since. He'd held her as she cried, or held her hair as she threw up. But neither of those gestures was nearly as intimate as this one, his hand resting lightly on her stomach. He felt his heart speed up at the realization of their closeness. Logan attempted to swallow the lump that had formed in his throat as he willed his thumb not to stroke her stomach. It would have been an unconscious gesture if he had, done purely on instinct. He wanted to keep touching her, to run his other hand down her arm slowly or through her hair. Anything to relieve the tension he was feeling. But it was a bad idea. So instead, Logan let his eyes wander.

He hadn't really given himself an opportunity to take in her figure fully since the breakup, too afraid of what he'd see if he really looked at her. But now he indulged in her, and he couldn't help but notice the changes he saw. It wasn't just that she'd filled out a little since she'd gotten pregnant; her breasts looked slightly bigger and her curves were a bit more pronounced than before. Now, Rory seemed to have a certain glow about her that hadn't been there before. He'd always thought that pregnancy glow was just a myth, and maybe it was. Even so, in his eyes, Rory positively radiated at that moment, standing before him in sweatpants and a tank top, her hair falling messily down past her shoulders, while his hand rested carefully over her stomach.

She'd never looked more beautiful to him.

Unconsciously, his gaze drifted to look at her directly, traveling up her body until he reached her face. That was a mistake. Rory was gazing down at her stomach expectantly, biting her lower lip, her hand still holding his in place. She was completely unaware of the tension in Logan's arm as he tried desperately to keep himself from holding her and feeling her in ways he hadn't in months. But finally, upon feeling Logan's gaze on her, Rory's eyes drifted up to meet his, freezing him into some sort of staring contest with her. _Shit_, Logan thought as their eyes locked, and the full intensity of her gaze fell over him.

"I don't feel anything," Logan whispered, hoping that Rory wouldn't notice the slight break in his voice.

Rory sighed and looked away, breaking whatever silent moment they were having. "Sorry," she murmured. "I was really hoping that - "

She felt it again, a slight punch in her abdomen, exactly where it had been the first time. Rory grinned as she looked back up at Logan. "Did you feel that?" she asked excitedly. The squirming continued inside her belly, and Rory's eyelids fluttered shut as she let the sensation of feeling her baby - _their_ baby - moving inside her stomach wash over her completely. She was smiling. It was the first truly genuine smile she'd had in a long time.

"Yeah I feel it," Logan said with a chuckle, his grin widening as he took in Rory's elation. Rory's hand covered his, moving it a little lower on her stomach so he could better feel the baby's movement. It was the oddest feeling in the world, one that made him intensely happy and sad simultaneously. To think that that small movement came from a life that he'd help to create was beautiful. At that moment, he wasn't scared. Creating a baby with Rory, however it had come into being, could only be something wonderful. It was what he had in mind when he proposed. He'd been thinking about their future together, and sharing moments like this one day. And he still wanted it. He wanted it all, and he didn't care what order he got it in. As long as he could have her too, none of it would matter.

But if it wasn't what she wanted, then Logan didn't think he could be this close to Rory. He needed to get out of there.

"I should probably…"

Rory's eyelids snapped open at Logan's suggestion. She didn't want him to leave just yet. Maybe the woman she'd seen him with _did_ have something to do with it.

"Oh," she said simply. "You have to get back to your friend?"

Logan frowned. "Who?"

"That woman I saw you with. The one visiting from California."

"Who, Tracy? She was my secretary. She's here on business. She's acting as a liaison between the two offices because she was my secretary. She's also married with two children." Logan studied her face carefully, wondering why it mattered to her so much who Tracy was.

Rory let out a sigh of relief. "Do you really have to leave then?" she asked him. "I could make some coffee or something. We could just talk or…" Her voice trailed off. Or what?

Logan sighed, finally pulling his hand away from her stomach. He'd left it there longer than he'd intended. Rory let the hand that had been covering his drop to her side. She made no movement to readjust her tank top, although it had ridden up quite a bit, revealing her rounder stomach.

"I don't think that's such a good idea." Logan said each word deliberately. He was trying to convince himself as much as her that his staying would result in nothing good for either of them. After her display this afternoon, it seemed very clear to him where he stood. She was trying to set boundaries, make their lives as separate as possible considering they were in each other's lives for good now. He should try to do the same, despite every instinct telling him not to. Despite the fact that he wanted to take her into his arms and not let go.

"Oh." Rory felt her heart sink. She turned away from him, worried that she'd start to cry in front of him, and folded her arms across her chest. "No, you're right. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. It's late, that was inappropriate of me." She had been so sure. She'd wanted to believe what her mother said, and had given him an opening to say something to her. His refusal said all she needed to know.

"Rory, come on. Don't be like that."

She turned around to face him, her emotions switching from heartbreak to anger instantly. "Like what, Logan?" Rory snapped.

"It wouldn't be a good idea for me to stay. We need…" Logan hesitated. "We need to have boundaries."

"And why's that, Logan?" Her anger was building. She'd gone from thinking that Logan still loved her to sharing what she thought was an intimate moment with him, only to have him back off when she handed him an open invitation. "Because I thought that everything…" She couldn't figure out how to say it.

"You thought what, Rory?" Logan pressed.

"I thought that you still loved me, alright?" Rory finally burst out. "But obviously I was mistaken. You know what, you're right. You should go."

"Rory - "

"Lock the door on your way out, will you?"

"Rory, just stop."

"Logan, please!" It was a very different plea than the one that had dragged him out of bed and over to her apartment in the middle of the night. "God, don't you get it? I can't take this anymore. It's hard enough…please, just go."

Logan studied her face carefully. The way she was staring down at her feet, avoiding eye contact. The way her lower lip was trembling, as though she were fighting to hold back tears. The way she stood stiffly with her arms folded across her chest.

"Do you love me?" Logan finally brought himself to ask the question he'd kept himself from asking her since she turned down his proposal, and all the doubt about her feelings for him had entered his mind.

Rory stopped staring at her feet, although she couldn't quite bring herself to look at him directly. "I'm not ready to get married!" she said in a rush.

"That's not what I'm asking!" Logan replied, his words coming out a little harsher than he'd intended. He took a deep breath to attempt to calm his frustration.

"But I can't answer that question, Logan!"

"Why not?"

"Because you wouldn't wait for me!" There was no holding back now; no amount of jaw clenching could keep her from crying. "You walked away from me. It doesn't matter what I think or feel, because when it came down to it, you didn't want to wait."

"Forget all of that." He needed a definitive answer. "Forget about the proposal and everything I said. Forget that I gave you that stupid ultimatum. Forget all of it and just answer me this one question: Rory Gilmore, are you still in love with me?"

She was crying too hard to answer right away. Rory shut her eyes tightly, trying to push the tears out of them with force. She was afraid of the after effects of her answer, of what it would mean.  
>Because even if she still loved him, he hadn't given her any inclination that he reciprocated her feelings.<p>

"Rory, please," she heard him plead.

Finally, Rory brought herself to look at him directly. His eyes were desperately searching her face for some sort of sign, worry written all over his features.

"I never stopped."

There was no sound in the room but their breathing as Logan took in her words, processing them and giving them meaning. He'd spent months doubting her, letting his hurt pride speak louder than what he really knew: Rory loved him. He'd let himself forget that, but she did love him. And that was all that mattered; more than what he wanted or any problems they may be having. She loved him.

"Screw it." Logan closed the gap between them in two large strides, took her face between his hands, and captured her lips with his own.

It felt like a sigh of relief. After all the missing and wanting, having her lips move against his again felt like he was coming home. Her arms moved up to wrap around Logan's neck, and Logan moved one hand down to her hips to pull her closer, wanting to feel her against him. He felt her tears, which were still flowing freely down her cheeks, wet against the hand that still gently cupped her cheek.

Logan broke away, resting his forehead against her. "Why are you crying?" he asked in a whisper, the hand gripping her waist rubbing a soothing circle against her skin.

"I'm just…I missed you. You have no idea how hard it's been."

"Shh." He kissed her once, trying to calm her. "I'm right here, Ace. I'm not going anywhere. And I think I've got a pretty good idea how hard it's been."

This time, Rory closed the distance, her hands wandering into his hair as her tongue asked for entrance into his mouth. And Logan was not about to deny Rory of something she wanted. Especially not when she was making little kitten noises with every breath.

"We should probably slow down," Rory murmured when they finally needed to pull back for some air.

"Right. Talk." He was kissing his way slowly down her neck. "Words are good."

"You know. Make sure we're both on the same page."

"I'm on whatever page that would allow me to keep doing this." He'd reached her collarbone now, and was a busy reveling in the feel and taste of her soft skin.

It was hard to concentrate, but Rory needed to stay focused. She bit back a groan and forced the words out. "You know what I mean, Logan. We shouldn't do this if we're still in different places. We could both get hurt if one of us leaves again."

Logan sighed, and forced himself to pull away from Rory slightly. "I'm not going to leave you again, Ace. Not now, not ever. And I don't think that either one of us is up for sorting out the exact details right this second. So can we just save that conversation for later?"

"Like on Buffy."

Logan frowned. It had been awhile since he had to keep up with her ever present pop culture references. He really must be off his game. "You lost me."

"There's an episode of Buffy when Willow and Tara seem like they're about to get back together. Then Tara comes to Willow and gives this whole speech on how a relationship can't be fixed overnight or with a cup of coffee, and how trust needs to be rebuilt. Then she asks if they can just skip that part and jump right to the kissing. Only she said it a lot more eloquently than I just did."

Logan smirked, running his fingers through a loose strand of Rory's hair. "I'm happy with that if you are." And he brought his lips back down to hers with greater force this time, the hand resting at her waist pushing her closer to him again.

Every touch, every sensation felt amplified to Rory. Her skin was on fire just from the feel of Logan's hands on her lower back, or his tongue swiping across her lips. She was trying to hold back, to savor in the moment, but she didn't think she could. She was in too much of a fervor to even be embarrassed by her need.

"Logan?" She tried to make it sound like a question, but his name came out as more of a groan when she broke away to give some much needed attention to his neck. When he took no notice of her, she was forced to stop her attack.

"What's wrong?" His hand was tangled in her hair and he was breathing heavily.

"Nothing's wrong _exactly_." She resumed her actions as a form of reassurance. "It's just…you know how being pregnant can make a girl's hormones go a little crazy?" She inched along his jaw line, making her way up towards his earlobe.

"Yeah, I've been thoroughly warned about the emotional overload train."

"Well, in addition to all that..." She took his earlobe between her teeth, causing Logan to suck in his breath. "Pregnancy kind of…increases your sex drive a little."

"A little?" he teased. Considering the way she was practically attacking her neck, Logan doubted it was only a little.

"A lot, actually." Her hands, which had been holding onto his shoulders for dear life, slowly made their way down his arms and underneath his shirt. She was surprised by her boldness; very rarely did she act so forward. But her body was on high alert, too much so for her to care. "I was hoping that we could move this party along a bit…more quickly. If that's okay."

"If that's okay?" Logan smirked. It always amazed him how she could act incredibly sexy and innocent at the same time, almost as though she was doubting her ability to seduce him. Little did she know that she really didn't need to try so hard. He was turned on by her just being herself. That was the thing he loved the most about her. She always kept him interested, whether or not she was trying to.

It was when she _did_ try that Logan usually lost his composure.

He placed a hand on the side of her neck and leaned down to capture her lips again, taking her lower lip between his teeth. She whimpered, and Logan held onto her firmly as he felt her knees begin to buckle underneath her.

"I think I'm going to like this side of you, Ace," Logan commented as he stumbled in the direction of what he assumed was the bedroom. "I like it when you're bold."

Rory kicked the door closed behind her with her foot. She broke away from Logan so she could lie down on the bed, waiting for him to follow. Logan pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor, pushed his pants down while also kicking his socks and shoes off, and then joined her, hovering cautiously over Rory.

"This won't hurt the baby, right?" he asked her, hesitating slightly. Logan brushed a stray piece of hair away from her cheek. His hand kept moving past her shoulder and down her arm, inching underneath her shirt.

"It'll be fine," Rory insisted, likewise running her hands across his exposed torso. Logan shuddered, partially from the cold air hitting his exposed skin, and partially from her touch. "Now, no more talking."

Logan had to agree. He made further conversation impossible by bringing his lips back down to meet hers, to which she responded hungrily. He had been holding himself up with his elbows, trying not to crush her stomach, but the fervor with which she was responding to him was making that impossible. Logan shifted to the side so he didn't need to hold himself up anymore, freeing his hands to pull Rory's tank top over her head, exposing her breasts to him. He pulled away for a minute so he could take her in fully, smiling to himself.

Rory suddenly became self conscious, folding her arms across her stomach. "I look fat," she commented.

Logan shook his head. "You look _beautiful_," he promised, and he went on to prove exactly how beautiful he thought she was.

* * *

><p>"I missed this."<p>

Logan chuckled softly as Rory snuggled against his side, her head resting on his chest. He was holding one of her hands and stroking her hair absentmindedly with the other.

Logan leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "You missed having sex with me?"

"No," Rory replied a little too quickly.

"No? Hey, that was some of my best work, Ace!"

Rory laughed. "Well, yeah of course I missed _that_. But that's not what I meant. I missed _this_ part. The afterwards part. All the intimacy stuff. The stuff that can't be replaced."

Logan smirked. "So you tried to replace me, huh? I'm a little disappointed."

"You know what I mean, Logan."

Logan let go of their intertwined hands so he could turn her chin so she was facing him. He kissed her softly, trying to keep from laughing. "I'm only teasing, Ace. Besides, I know you couldn't replace me."

"Hey, there was a three week gap between us breaking up and me finding out I was pregnant. That's more than enough time for a little replacement therapy if I wanted."

"Was that a dig at the time I slept with those bridesmaids? You're bringing that up now?"

Rory giggled. "I'm only teasing, Logan," she bit back in a mocking tone. She rested her head back on his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. "Besides," she said with a sigh as she hugged herself closer. "You wouldn't have been able to replace me either."

"Oh, I have no doubt about that." He circled his arm back around her shoulder. "I couldn't replace you even if I wanted to. That's part of why I - " Logan stopped himself. He didn't want to bring that up now, right when everything seemed to be coming back together for them.

"That's why you what?"

Logan shook his head. "It's not important."

Rory pushed herself into a sitting position, tugging on the comforter to keep her chest covered. "That's why you proposed. Is that what you were going to say?"

Logan sighed, sitting up as well. "We don't have to talk about this now."

"I think we do, though. Before we both get in too deep, we should sort this all out. Make sure that we both understand each other. Because if this is going to work, and I mean _really_ work, I need to know that we're both on the same page."

Logan brought his hand up to cup her cheek, gently stroking it with his thumb. She looked so vulnerable, like she was still afraid that he'd change his mind and leave again. He needed to reassure her that he was never going to do that. He stood to lose too much this time.

He let his hand drop away from her face. "I never told you where I got the idea to propose, did I?"

Rory shook her head.

"I was in Palo Alto having those meetings. We were negotiating my contract when a secretary came in to refill our coffee. And then all of a sudden I started daydreaming about my apartment back in New York. There was this one morning when you were making coffee wearing only one of my shirts."

"I remember," Rory replied, blushing furiously. "You were staring at me."

"Right. Anyway, I was sitting there thinking about something so insignificant in the grand scheme of our relationship, and I just remember thinking, 'I need to marry that girl.' That was it. No doubt. I was so sure about you and us. So I went out and did what I thought I had to do in order to make it happen. I bought a ring. I looked for a house. I researched newspapers. I even went to your mom the day I got back and asked for permission."

"Yeah, she told me about that later."

"I planned out everything so carefully that I forgot the most important detail. You're not impulsive like I am. You can't make those decisions on the spot. I was asking you to marry me when we hadn't once given the subject any discussion. I should have remembered that"

The story made Rory's heart ache a little bit. "It's not like I'd never _thought_ about it, Logan. Of course I have. But there's a huge difference between thinking about it whimsically and it being a reality."

"I know that. Trust me; my sister gave me an earful when she found out that we'd never had The Talk before. Apparently I'm still learning how to do relationships."

"You're not the only one," Rory muttered. "I didn't even fight you. I just let you leave. I couldn't say yes, and I couldn't stop you from leaving. I felt like I had no right to be missing you because I let it happen."

"I wasn't your fault, Rory. I batched the proposal. I was so…I let my pride get the better of me when you turned me down. I thought that you must not love me as much as I loved you if you didn't want to get married. It was dumb and petty, and I wasn't really paying any attention to the reason you said no. An armed guard probably couldn't have kept me from leaving after that."

"I don't blame you for being hurt. It hurt _me_ doing it."

"But that's not all. I thought that making it this big thing in front of your family would be romantic. I didn't even think about the fact that we'd never discussed it before. Or that you hate grand gestures. I should have done it differently. I should have waited. I'm so sorry."

Rory rested her head on his shoulder. "I know. And I'm sorry too. It hurt me just as much to have to turn you down, but I didn't see any way around it. I just thought that if I sacrificed my career for my relationship now, then I'd always be doing that. I had to make a decision. And it hurt so much, but I had to do it. I just remember thinking about how when you were in California, Paris was getting her acceptance letters to every single medical and law school she'd applied to. She even tried to break up with Doyle so he wouldn't be part of that decision making process for her. But it backfired. He said that he'd follow her wherever she went, no matter what. That's how I knew that I had to do the same. I couldn't move to California with you and hope my career would get going. I had to keep my options opened. And I was so _sure_ of our relationship that I assumed you'd let me have that freedom. So I said no, and I let you walk away, and it called me"

Logan wrapped his arm around Rory's shoulder and kissed the top of her head. "I went back on everything I said to you before I left. I'd told you not to factor me in when making your decision, and then I asked you to come with me. I was trying to be romantic."

"You _were _romantic. Really. But I had to put my career first."

Logan sighed. "That can't be the only reason you said no. Otherwise we'd be engaged right now."

"But this is different. My mom spent my entire life putting everything on hold for me. I have to do the same."

"I know, and I'm not saying that you shouldn't be making that sacrifice for our kid when you wouldn't do it for me. I'm saying that there has to be something else. I know you, Rory. I know that you probably sat down and made a pro/con list to figure out whether or not you should say yes. But I can't possibly believe that your career is the only thing holding you back. There has to be another reason."

Rory turned slightly, burying her face in his side. "It's silly," she mumbled.

"Whatever it is, I can handle it. Please, just tell me why."

Rory giggled despite herself.

"What?" Logan asked.

She pulled away so she could look at him. "'Aint nothing but a heartache."

Logan still didn't get it.

"The Backstreet Boys? I Want It That Way."

"Why do you know the words to a Backstreet Boys Song?"

"Lane and I went through a boy band mocking faze for a couple of months. My mom hated it; it didn't last very long."

"No, I can't imagine Lorelai being too happy with anyone playing nineties boy bands in her house. But don't change the subject, Ace. I still want to know what's holding you back."

Rory pulled her knees up to her chest with a sigh, wrapping her arms around her legs. She noted that this whole process wasn't as easy as it once was; her stomach was beginning to get in the way a little.

"Marriage freaks me out," Rory finally admitted. "It fills me with this feeling of complete dread that I can't really explain. I've seen marriage ruin some truly great relationships. And I just…it terrifies me Logan. I don't want that to be us. I don't want to be the one panicking and leaving you the day before our wedding because I'm afraid. I can't do that to you. And I'm not sure enough of myself to know that I'd never do that. I _have_ to be sure, Logan."

Logan reached out and ran his hand up her arm. Rory sighed into his touch.

"I'm sorry," Rory said with a sigh.

"For what? I asked you to be honest with me. And I understand."

"Do you really, though? Because I'm not even sure if I do."

"Of course I understand, Ace. Hell, I was afraid to even get in this relationship in the first place. You scared the crap out of me, Ace, right from the minute I met you."

Rory grinned. "Liar. I didn't even talk to you during our first encounter. And our second one we were debating the whole time."

"You never did call me Master and Commander like I asked," Logan teased. "Alright. I think it really began at the Life and Death Brigade event. I had at least five girls there vying for my attention, but I kept seeking you out. Colin was making fun of me the whole time, it was pathetic."

Rory giggled. "Did he use the letter E at all while making fun of you?"

"The _point_," Logan said, trying to get the conversation back on track. "The point is that I was dragging my heels the whole time. I was afraid to get involved, but not so afraid that I was willing to let go of you either. And then one day it just clicked. One day I realized that I'd been in love with you this whole time, and I was stupid for trying to act otherwise. And I think that's what you're waiting for. You need that moment of clarity that tells you beyond a shadow of doubt that you're ready to get married, and you were stupid for thinking otherwise."

She was tired of sitting up. Rory sunk back down into the bed, resting her head in Logan's lap on top of the comforter. He ran his hand through her hair.

"It feels so silly. I mean, of all the things for me to be scared of now. I have so many other things to be afraid of."

Logan chuckled. "How long is the list?"

"Not as long as you'd think. I'm worried that I'll be a bad mother, that I'll never get to be a real reporter, and that I'll have to watch you fall in love with and marry someone else all the while I'm raising _your_ baby on my own and I'll always be in love with you. All of which, for some reason, doesn't scare me nearly as much as the thought of marriage." Rory sat back up. "I'll understand if you change your mind."

Logan frowned. "Why? Because you're not ready to get married?"

"Because nothing's changed."

Logan smirked. "That's where you're wrong, Ace. Everything's changed." Placing a hand on her neck, Logan leaned down to give her a slow, lingering kiss. Rory felt her whole body tingle. He pulled away just as Rory moved to wrap her arms around his neck in an attempt to deepen the kiss.

"I've got an idea. Now you say that the problem is you're afraid of marriage. But you're not going to be afraid forever."

"No, I don't think that I will. That's all I need, Logan. Some time."

"Alright. So when the time comes and you're ready to get married, you just let me know."

Rory laughed. "Just like that? And what do we do until then?"

"Exactly what we were doing before, Ace. Only with a baby."

"I can't ask you to do that, Logan. You want to get married."

"I want to be with you more. And this is what you need."

With a sigh, Rory sunk back into her bed, folding her arms over the comforter. Logan lay down next to her, pulling her into his chest with an arm. She wasn't mad per say. But she was skeptical.

"This is what I want, Rory," Logan insisted. "I don't want to do joint custody. I don't want to meet anyone else or marry anyone else or have kids with anyone else. I love you and I want to be with you; married or not. And I know that scares you. It scares the crap out of me too. But if these past few months have proved anything, it's that being apart won't change anything. So why fight it?"

"I don't want to make you wait."

Logan couldn't help but laugh. "You're not making me do anything, Ace. I'm doing what I should have done the day you asked me for more time. I want you and only you, whatever it takes."

Rory had never seen Logan this emotionally raw before. It was how she knew she could believe him. It gave her a little thrill in her stomach, and not because of the baby.

Rory rolled onto her side so she was facing Logan. Propping her head up with her arm, she gave Logan a mischievous grin. "So, you just want me to let you know when I'm ready to get married? That's not very romantic."

Logan smirked. "Oh don't worry, you'll still get a proposal."

"Can I get any hints?"

Logan rolled his eyes. "Nope."

"What if I guess. Will you tell me then?"

"Nope."

"Are you gonna do the whole order a glass of champagne thing and put the ring at the bottom of my glass? Because I always thought that to be a little gross. Wouldn't the ring be all sticky afterwards?"

Logan chuckled. "Not that I'm going to tell you, but if I _was_ planning to do that I certainly won't now."

Rory pushed herself over him until she was hovering inches away from his lips. Her hair fell around her shoulders like a curtain, touching the edges of Logan's shoulders. "I have ways of making you talk, you know," Rory whispered in the most seductive tone she could muster.

Logan distracted her by skillfully rolling her underneath him. Rory squealed in surprise as he trapped her underneath him, each of his arms placed on either side of her head. "You're not gonna get me to crack, but I won't stop you from trying."

"Is that a challenge?" Rory asked, raising her eyebrow.

"Make of it what you will, Ace." Logan's voice actually was low and seductive, sending a shiver down Rory's spine. She pulled Logan's head down to hers and attacked his lips like they had the ability to breathe life back into her.

"I love you, Logan," Rory whispered as those same lips and tongue slowly traced a pattern along her jaw and down her neck. "Thank you."

Logan paused his motions so he could look at Rory directly. "You don't need to thank me, Ace. I love, too."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **So now you understand why I couldn't get these two crazy kids back together sooner. I've been planning out this chapter pretty much since I came up with the idea for the story. I think it was well worth the wait, don't you? Because I've been planning it for so long, I worked very hard on this chapter. So I hope you enjoyed i.t :)


	14. I'm Happy If You're Happy

**A/N: **Hey guys! I'm sure you thought that all my stories were dead. It's been an insane several months. I was away all summer sans technology, so I couldn't write. Then when I came home and the semester started again, I've been overwhelmed by my schoolwork and writing articles. But I'm trying to get back on track with my stories.

I kept this chapter short and fluffy so that I could get it finished as quickly as possible for you guys. I had more planned, but I wanted to get this up quickly. I'm going to try to go back to regular posting. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><span>Chapter Fourteen – I'm Happy if You're Happy<span>

Despite only getting a few hours of sleep, Logan woke up feeling completely rested. It took a moment for his sleep addled brain to remember why he woke up feeling so content. He was technically awake; that is to say, Logan was conscious. But he had yet to open his eyes or move at all; his body was still numb and his brain was still filled with fog. He was in the process of trying to remind his body how to function when he heard a sigh, and felt another body curling into his.

Logan smiled, his brain finally waking up enough to register where he was. Rory was still sound asleep, her mused hair falling across her face. Logan carefully pushed the hair aside, not wanting to wake her just yet.

It was hard for Logan to believe that they had only been apart for a few months. So much had happened between them in that short amount of time. Now they had come full circle; or at least Logan had. He was happier than he'd been all summer. He felt like they were back to where they had been before the proposal, before Logan screwed everything up. He felt content in that feeling.

He would never admit it to her, but Logan was thanking God, his lucky stars, or whatever higher power there was that Rory had gotten pregnant. If she hadn't, it might have been years before his anger subsided enough to try and win her back, if ever. He was a fool to think that they had to push their relationship forward; they were developing just fine on their own. Now he couldn't even remember what had made him think that it had to be one way or the other. Rory may have been his first real relationship and the first person he'd ever fallen in love with, but Logan wasn't an idiot. He knew that what they had, what they had grown into with time was something special. It didn't come around very often, and Logan had been so stupid to think he should just let it go so easily, especially considering how hard he'd fought in the past to hold onto them when it looked like they would fall apart. What made him think that not being ready to get married meant the end of their relationship?

He would be eternally in debt to that baby for willing itself into existence right at the moment when his own pigheadedness was getting in the way. But he could never tell Rory that. Logan could tell that she was still a little on edge about the whole pregnancy. And why should she be happy? She was giving up so much in order to have that baby; she was putting her dream on hold for it. She'd left a dream job to move back to Connecticut and work for a small paper. She wasn't traveling and covering what could be one of the most historic presidential elections in the country's history, she was back in her small hometown. Except for a few meltdowns, most of which Logan hadn't even witnessed, she hadn't once complained about how much she was giving up.

If Rory had come from any other family with any other upbringing, Logan would have expected Rory to get an abortion. She was the most determined person he'd ever met, and he'd never doubted that she'd let anything stand in the way of her high journalistic aspirations. Even during her time away from Yale, he'd always thought she'd get back on the right track eventually. A pregnancy was possibly the only thing that could derail her; she was knocked off course without a second thought of going back. Not because she didn't want to, but because she couldn't. She, like her mother, was willing to sacrifice everything for the sake of her child. He admired that in her.

In a way, Lorelai had almost had it easier than Rory. When Lorelai ran away with baby Rory to make a life for the two of them, the only thing she was giving up was easy financial support. What she was gaining, freedom, was far more valuable than any dollar amount. And in a way, Rory had become the solution to a problem Lorelai barely knew the answer to. She'd wanted a way out, though maybe not this way out, and Rory had provided it. Logan knew all too well the life Lorelai had left behind, so he could pretty much guarantee that Lorelai hadn't given a single thought to her future before finding out she was pregnant.

Rory, on the other hand, had done nothing but think about her future. Going to Chilton and Yale, becoming editor of the Yale Daily News, interning at smaller papers: they were all merely stepping stones on the way to becoming a journalist like Christiane Amanpour. Even her first job out of college was the perfect next step towards achieving that goal. It must have been heartbreaking for Rory to watch it all come crashing down the minute the strip turned pink. He'd seen firsthand how hard she was willing to work for something she wanted, particularly when it came to journalism. Logan kicked himself again for thinking that she would put their relationship first. Not now, not when the thing she'd wanted her entire life was in such close reach. But she was putting all of that aside now so she could stay healthy and take care of the baby.

Logan kissed her head lightly before carefully extracting himself from her tangled limbs. This wouldn't be forever, he told himself. He wouldn't let it. Logan was going to make sure that this little hiccup in her plan didn't keep her from achieving everything she ever wanted. Stars Hollow was fine for now, but Rory needed someplace bigger. His new goal in life was to make sure that this didn't stop her. He had no clue how he'd do it; there were so many other factors now that a baby was involved. But Logan would make sure that Rory would still get to be everything she'd always wanted.

He gave Rory's hair one last gentle stroke before finally getting out of bed, collecting his discarded clothes off the floor. He didn't want to leave. If he could, Logan would stay there with her all day. But he couldn't avoid his meeting at work, and Logan really needed to get back to his apartment beforehand to shower and change. Logan pulled his clothes on with a sigh, and headed into the kitchen to find something to leave a note for Rory on.

* * *

><p>Rory felt a rush of momentary panic when she woke up to find the bed empty.<p>

"Logan?" She pushed herself upright, dragging the blanket up to cover her chest. Her heart was racing. For a moment, she let her imagination run away from her. Had he left her in the middle of the night? Was everything he'd said last night a lie?

A terrible thought flashed through her head. In the panic of finding that Logan wasn't there, Rory remembered a time when she was seventeen, talking with her father at Sookie's wedding. He'd promised her that it was for real this time; that he was in it for the long haul. And then, mere minutes after making that promise, Christopher had run off because something else had gotten in the way. Again.

Christopher's promises had all been for nothing. She wasn't enough to make him stay back then. What made Rory think that this was any different? She was still the same person, and Logan had made promises to her before that he hadn't kept. Recently, in fact.

Then, a few seconds after that thought crossed her mind, Logan came striding into the room, and Rory felt herself relax.

"Sorry, did I wake you?" Logan asked, sitting on the edge of the bed next to her.

Rory glanced at the clocked, noticing for the first time the early hour. It was barely even six o'clock.

She frowned. "Why are you up so early?"

Logan grasped one of her hands in his and stroked the top of it with his thumb. "I've got meetings all morning, and I still need to shower and change before I head into the office."

When Rory didn't respond immediately, Logan sighed. The disappointment must have shown on her face.

"Trust me," Logan continued. "I would much rather skip the meetings and stay here with you." He smirked, eyeing the blanket that she was clutching to her chest with her free hand. "For one, the view alone is significantly better."

Rory grinned, comforted by his comments. "What about the company?" she teased.

Logan shrugged, his smirk growing wider. "Ah, I could take it or leave it."

She smacked him playfully in the chest, the blanket slipping to reveal her naked chest.

"Oh yeah," Logan commented casually, not bothering to avert is gaze. "_Much_ better view here."

"So come back to bed," said Rory as seductively as she could. She didn't feel particularly sexy at the moment, but the teasing and the casual banter made her feel almost normal again.

"I would if I could," he promised.

"Five more minutes?" Rory suggested, biting down on her lower lip.

"What would we do for five minutes? Go back to sleep?"

"Hey, who said anything about sleeping?" A sly grin spread across Rory's face.

Logan gaped at her. "I think I'm going to like you being pregnant, Ace." He leaned down to kiss her softly.

"I'll remind you of that the next time I'm crying over an empty bag of Redvines."

"Nah, I think I'll enjoy it even then."

The sense of normalcy that Rory felt during the exchange did more to calm her than Logan still being there. She'd been feeling as though her emotions have been on high alert since becoming pregnant. Nothing made her feel normal quite like witty banter between her and Logan.

"Now, I'm gonna be in meetings pretty much all day, so you won't be able to get in contact with me," Logan told her. "But I'll see you tonight?"

"Dinner?"

Logan nodded his assent, but didn't so much as shift his position to get up and leave.

"You sure you're about to leave?" Rory asked.

He took a deep breath. "I'm just trying to figure out how to say goodbye to you without feeling like a giant cliché."

"What are you talking about?" Rory asked, frowning.

He kissed her once on the lips, then pushed the blanket aside and kissed her once on the swell of her stomach.

* * *

><p>It had been hard for Rory to really take note of the toll that pregnancy stress had taken on her. She'd been dealing with anxiety for months, even before realizing she was pregnant. That anxiety only increased when the tests came up positive. There were questions, never ending questions of why's and how's and the lists she would normally fall back on did nothing to ease her. There was only so much reassuring her mother could do for her, even though Lorelai had been through it all before. She was too emotional, too hormonal to think rationally.<p>

The Logan Question, at least recently, had been the source of many of those anxieties. And nothing made her feel confident that she could, and _would_, work everything out quite like the feel of Logan kissing her stomach as he said goodbye before leaving for work.

It wasn't gone completely. She was still worried about how everything would work out. But that little voice in the back of her head was now telling her that she _will_ be able to make it all work. That one small gesture from Logan did more to ease her than anything he could have said.

It must have shown, somehow. When Rory stepped into Luke's that morning to meet her mother for breakfast, Lorelai gave her a puzzled look as she sat down at the table across from her.

"What?" Rory asked as she scooted her chair in.

Lorelai frowned. "You're smiling," she stated simply.

So she was. Rory hadn't even noticed. "I'm not allowed to smile?"

"No, I mean you're _really_ smiling."

Rory frowned, but it was the sort of frown that couldn't mask her happiness. "Does this have a point?" she asked.

"You look happy," Lorelai commented in the same tone as before: point blank, but still with an air of question.

"I ask again, does this have a point?"

"I mean _really_ happy," Lorelai repeated, folding her arms across her chest. "You're…are you _glowing_?"

"I don't know," Rory said, squirming a little under the scrutiny. "What does that even mean?

"Why are you so happy?"

"I'm not allowed to be happy?" she asked as Luke came over to take her order. "Just coffee some pancakes, Luke."

"No way, you're not having any coffee!" Lorelai pulled Rory's empty mug away from her so Luke couldn't fill it.

"Hey!"

"Sorry, no coffee for you."

"You cannot be serious!"

"You are way too happy this morning!"

"Since when am I not allowed to be happy?"

"Should I leave?" Luke asked.

"Yeah thanks," Lorelai said without taking her focus off of Rory. "No, you're not allowed to be happy when the last time I saw you, you were having a panic attack because you saw Logan _talking_ to another woman. So you've either had way too much coffee this morning or something's happened since you left my house last night. Either way, you're not getting your mug back until you explain yourself."

It wasn't that Rory didn't want to tell her mother. She just thought she'd have longer than 30 seconds to revel in the moment before letting someone else in.

"I felt the baby kick last night," she said quietly.

Lorelai's face changed immediately. "Really?" She placed the mug back on the table. "Oh, Rory, that's so exciting!"

"Yeah," Rory replied with a laugh, biting down on her lower lip. She glanced down at her stomach quickly and placed a hand there unconsciously. "It was…wonderful, and terrifying. And…and I was just sitting there alone in my apartment, and I remember thinking that this is what it was going to be like for the rest of my life. The baby would take its first steps and I'd be happy…but no one else would be there to share it with me."

"Oh, hun." Lorelai reached a hand across the table to grasp one of Rory's.

"No, it's not a sad thing." Rory took her hand back and placed it in her lap. "I just…I felt weird being alone for that. So…I called Logan."

Lorelai folded her arms across her chest again. "You called Logan."

"Yes."

"And you what, chatted about the weather?"

"No, I asked him to come over."

She scrutinized Rory without saying a word for a few minutes. In that time, Luke came to their table, placed their breakfast in front of them, and poured Rory some coffee, and all the while the two of them didn't speak.

"So let me get this straight," Lorelai finally said. "Last night you feel the baby kick. And in a fit of insanity you decide to call the father of your child to come over. In the middle of the night. Did I get everything?"

"Yeah, that about sums it up." Rory took a sip of her coffee.

"What could possibly possess you to do that?" Lorelai asked. "Did you think having yet another argument about who did a better job of screwing up your relationship was a good idea?"

"I just wanted him to be there," Rory insisted. "I kept thinking about how he's _here_, but he's not really here the way I want him to be. And, I don't know, I didn't really think about it. I felt the baby kick and I wanted Logan to be there too." Rory studied her mom for a moment. "Are you mad?"

"Why would I be mad?"

"I don't know, because you're not saying anything."

"I'm just bit confused. You feel the baby kick and all of a sudden everything's okay between you two?"

"No! I mean, yeah we worked things out…"

"Just like that?"

"Yes, Mom. Just like that. God, why are you trying to ruin this for me?"

Lorelai frowned. "I'm not…why are you behaving like a teenager?"

"I'm pregnant; I'm allowed to be immature. It's in the handbook."

"Look," Lorelai said. "I'm not trying to ruin anything. I'm just trying to get all the facts here." She paused to take a sip of her coffee. "I'm sorry. I _am_ happy for you. I just want to make sure you've thought it all through."

"Well I have." Rory finally picked up her fork and began piling eggs into her mouth. "I love him, Mom. And he really wants it to work out, for real."

"And this is what you want? What about getting married?"

"He says he'll wait until I'm ready."

Lorelai frowned. "He goes from wanting to marry you right now to waiting indefinitely?"

"It's not like that." Rory put down her fork as she tried to think of the best way to explain things. "We talked about the proposal and what we were feeling at the time and everything that went wrong. And then we talked about where we stand now, and after all that he told me to let him know when I'm ready to get married."

"He's okay with that?"

Rory shrugged. "Apparently."

After a few minutes of silent contemplation, Lorelai finally let the skeptical expression drop from her face. "Well I'm happy if you're happy, sweetie."

"I am," Rory promised. "I really am."


End file.
